Options The Fuzzy Glove Hour with Ken and Andy: Playlist from January 18, 2017 Options

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The program formerly known as Seven Second Delay, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

Wednesdays 6 - 7pm (EDT) | On WFMU | 91.1, 90.1, 91.9 FM & wfmu.org
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Options January 18, 2017: Time Travel with the Robots


Today's topic is “Time machines”, with the question being, “What would you do if you had one?” To make it even more interesting, everyone, including Ken and Andy, is required to use a computerized robot voice generator. Robot callers flock to the airwaves to contribute non-stop one-liners. People call in with legit answers to the topic question, ranging from poignant to silly. Others offer up robot zingers, while some simply opt to provide random nonsense. It all adds up to form quite the robot bouillabaisse! (Recap by Andrew M)

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Listener comments!

Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:02pm -Ken:

Hello to all of my friends
  6:02pm AndyBreck:

This is my first comment post ever!
Avatar ♥ 6:02pm Hoboken Jack:

What was that closest intersection to Andy's location again?
Avatar 6:02pm Cliff in Prague:

Hello Ken & Andy! I actually stayed up late for this show today
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:02pm -max-:

Can't believe that you got through!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:02pm -Ken:

You did that very well, Andy.
  6:02pm ScottC:

I have a tin taste in my mouth like a robot.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:03pm Stevel:

First the keyboard, then the keyboard on the airwaves. Today is a great day.
  6:03pm oh I like that new app:

Amazing
Avatar 6:03pm Kolob Drone:

Greeting Ess Ess Dee Listeners and Great Job Andy and Josh and Ken
  6:03pm Torbjørn:

First time robot, long time listener, can't believe I'm experiencing sentience. Are there any other robots in the house tonight ?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:03pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Zebra Trucks!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:04pm melinda:

I like the robot voice that sounds kind of strangled.
  6:04pm woy:

Greetings from Berlin
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:04pm dgg:

i have a huge anticipation for this show.
Avatar 6:04pm Cliff in Prague:

Andy's son is a tech genius. I, for one, welcome our new voice-synthesized overlords.
  6:04pm woy:

Are we really going to do this????
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:04pm joe mulligan:

that's nice background music but if there's no one there i will need to disconnect the call. ok i'm disconnecting the call.
  6:04pm Rai:

this seems like good way to drum up more comments. and only a little desperate.
  6:04pm ScottC:

Arise metallic minions and eat the flesh of the weak human race...
Avatar 6:05pm Kolob Drone:

i have a fancy accent see see can you hear my accent i am fancy robot
Avatar 6:05pm Linda Lee:

greetings human beans!
  ♥ 6:05pm AndyBreck:

Hey Boys and Girls- this is Andy- we have a great topic tonight! Here it is- ready? If you had a time machine, how would you use it?
  6:05pm sue:

Shout out to little man Soren
  6:05pm woy:

Well, this is new
  6:05pm Torbjørn:

I would suggest to any voice-enabled robots to call in on the new number, 241-209-9368, and try out their vocal processors.
Avatar ♥ 6:05pm Hoboken Jack:

I am a robot in a rowboat with a rabbit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:05pm Folsom:

domo arigato mr roboto
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:05pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Hold it, I am the only one on WFMU thats gets to have a computerized voice. this is unfair in all regards.
  6:06pm Sam:

Are you taking calls?
Avatar 6:06pm Cliff in Prague:

Hey why do I hear the robot voices only on the RIGHT channel?! Ken???
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:06pm Glenn L:

The store cored is morbidly flawed.
Avatar 6:06pm geezerette:

Hail,harbingers of multiple singularities.
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:06pm steveplusone:

i left my masturbatiorium for this?
  6:06pm Sean d:

wish I was a time machine
  6:06pm Sam:

What if someone curses????
  ♥ 6:06pm AndyBreckm:

Hey boys and girls- this is Andy- We have a great topic tonight-- here it is-- are you ready? If you had a time machine how would you use it?
  6:06pm wild neil:

me love you long time!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:06pm WFMU listener WADE:

all comments on the playlist read aloud in computer
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:06pm -Ken:

Cliff, the robot only works on the right channel. I am sorry.
  6:07pm Mr. Roboto:

; DROP TABLE "USERS"; -- J/K!
Avatar ♥ 6:07pm Jeff:

Do I have a fancy robot voice, or a terrible robot voice?
Avatar 6:07pm Linda Lee:

the more a thing tends to be permanent, the more it tends to be lifeless.
  6:07pm Sam:

Comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero comma zero
Avatar 6:07pm Kolob Drone:

aaron's voice is super whiny el oh el el oh el el oh el
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:07pm Sebastian:

F asterisk asterisk asterisk, this again!
Avatar 6:07pm Cliff in Prague:

Ken, that triggers my OCD, but I will deal with it for the duration of the hour.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:07pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Oh sure make me sound like a whiny girl. real mature
Avatar 6:08pm Kolob Drone:

andy knows how to copy and paste. great job andy!
  6:08pm woy:

''No wonder the Today Show on biased @NBC is doing so badly compared to its glorious past. Little credibility!" Donald J Trump
Avatar 6:08pm geezerette:

:D !!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:08pm -max-:

Uh.... Clem.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:08pm -Ken:

Cliff, the left channel is back.
Avatar 6:08pm Linda Lee:

are you my mother?
Avatar ♥ 6:08pm Jeff:

Sit Lola, Sit!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:08pm Glenn L:

Papa ooh mow mow. Papa ooh mow ma mow.
  ♥ 6:08pm AndyBreckma:

If I had time machine, I would go back to Germany in 1938 and find Adolph Hitler and pull a prank on him. Like, maybe, I would short his sheets!
  6:08pm wild neil:

i would go back to my 12 year old self and explain women.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:08pm WFMU listener WADE:

I am Frightened
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:08pm steveplusone:

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
Where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
Avatar 6:08pm Cliff in Prague:

Thanks Ken!!
  6:08pm some guy in space:

When zombie Optimus came under Quintesson control,
Destruction of the Autobots became his primary goal!
He tricked Wheelie and others into a terrible trap
Full of missiles and explosions to turn them to scrap!
But Wheelie survived when Rodimus Prime returned
And left the zombie Optimus behind to be burned.
Dark Awakening
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Ya'll go ahead and type any old cuss words you feel like. There's a built-in swear filter, as I understand the situation.
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm Walt:

I'm alive.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm Glenn L:

Yes robot now in both channels.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm -Ken:

Hey everybody. We do have a topic. The topic is what would you do with a time machine?
  6:09pm sue:

Ssssssssssssssssssssss
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm common:

brilliant!
  6:09pm Payton:

I hope my husband is listening to this. Hi Keith.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm dgg:

El amor no se puede olvidar
El amor no se puede olvidar
El amor si fue amor de verdad
El amor no se puede olvidar
  6:09pm woy:

I am your father
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm sweeks:

I see what's going on here
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm Folsom:

Bird Bird Bird is the word
  6:09pm Mr. Roboto:

¡noʎ ǝɹɐp I 'sᴉɥʇ pɐǝɹ
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:09pm Walt:

Wild Neil - could you do that for me?
  6:10pm Rai:

if I had a time machine I'd go back and tell myself not to stress so much about girls, and invest lots in microsoft
  6:10pm Sam:

Scooby dooby dooby dooby doo, diddly doo wah diddly doo way
  6:10pm ?:

Chopper in bound soisoisoisoisoi
Avatar 6:10pm Kolob Drone:

i would go back to the glorious moment the angel moroni appeared to the prophet smith in the sacred grove and i'd take a selfie for proof that he truly restored the lord's gospel here on planet earth
Avatar ♥ 6:10pm Hoboken Jack:

If I had a time machine, I'd hammer in the morning, and then hammer in the far distant future.
  6:10pm wild neil:

walt i would love to.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:11pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to march of last year and take back my pledge, oh wait I never pledged. Crap
Avatar 6:11pm Cliff in Prague:

I would use my time machine to go back to 1 day ago and talk Andy and Ken out of doing this. No, who am I kidding? This is fantastic!!
  6:11pm Sean d:

this is a test, a test of the unemergency system...you fail this test
Avatar 6:11pm Linda Lee:

asheville jon. tag you are it.
  6:11pm ScottC:

I would go back in time to when we had the old wfmu mobile app.
Avatar 6:11pm Kolob Drone:

shout out to my cat ethel and my other cat berry and my other cat edgar
  ♥ 6:11pm AndyBreckma:

Hey children- this is Andy- if I had a time machine I know exactly what I would do-- I would sell the time machine and buy a bunch of Playboy magazines
  6:11pm Torbjørn:

Where is the robot version of the Breckman family ? Robot-Beth, please sign in.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:11pm WFMU listener WADE:

In a time machine, I would cry. It would be such a lonely place. How long does a time machine take?
  6:11pm Frank in:

Is the sap running?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:11pm Ken From Hyde Park:

If I had a time machine, I'd invest all my money in a robot voice company.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:11pm -Ken:

OK everybody. I am going to ban people who say the same word over and over again. That is what we like to call "uncool." bEING UNCOOL IS BAD. dO NOT BE UNCOOL.
  6:11pm Payton:

Ok, if I could use a time machine I would probably watch my grandmother grow up in Brooklyn.
  6:11pm sue:

Doo dee dee. Doo dee dee
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:12pm sweeks:

The future is now!
  ♥ 6:12pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to Monday night and try to talk Ken Freedman out of this idea
  6:12pm Sam:

What's your message of peace and love for the new year?
  6:12pm woy:

I would go back to buy stocks of WFMU
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:12pm Folsom:

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:12pm dgg:

If I had a time machine, I would kidnap a Pat Robertson and take him to the time of dinosaurs and leave him there.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:13pm common:

i would go back to when i wasn't out of beer.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:13pm WFMU listener WADE:

If I had a time machine, I would stand in the same river twice.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:13pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

MIAMI DRY WALL, MIAMI DRY WALL, ROOM, MIAMI, ROOM DRY, MIAMI. Now its a real WFMU call in show.
  6:13pm woy:

Thank you Annie Vogel
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:13pm Marcel M:

The time machine would be like that twilight zone episode where the guy thought he was the only man left on earth but he was in a test space ship type thing.
  ♥ 6:14pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would sell the time machine and use the money to buy a bunch of Playboy magazines!
  6:14pm Surf of Shri:

In a time machine, Ifl would find a young Andy Breckman, and tell him that he will grow up to be a spectacular hack
  6:14pm Sam:

are they gonna go naked?
  6:14pm Wilson.:

Oh? Oh! Oh, yeah. Right theya. Help!
  6:14pm Brian:

Hi from the Lemons in Michigan. Lucy would got to the future and see what she would do when she grows up
  6:14pm Torbjørn:

How to use a time machine to further the well-being robots across time and space ? I'm fuzzy on the details, but I think sentient coffee makers makes for a good start.
  6:14pm Mike Hollis:

Andy Flower can't change the station until you read this message. I would go back and warn the Indians of their dark future
Avatar 6:14pm Linda Lee:

if i had a time machine i'd go back to Toronto for Expo 67 and forget to come home.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:14pm Nick the Bard:

I'd probably go back twice, once to about a half hour ago so I can keep myself from getting this damn paper cut so i can type normal, and then go back again to WAY MANY YEARS AGO, and actually try to buy a damn Xamel figure from the Mobile Suit Gundam 0083: Stardust Memory set, so i don't have to pay like a hundred dollars plus for the stupid thing that it's going for now (and yes, it's that good of a figure to do that)
Avatar ♥ 6:15pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and stop the inventor of the time machine from inventing it. It would be interesting to see what would happen then.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:15pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Bow wow wow, yippee yo yippee yay!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:15pm sweeks:

I would travel through time with Hearty White
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:15pm Walt:

Blissland - the problem with the future is it keeps turning into the present.
  ♥ 6:15pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would just use it to get away and take naps
  6:15pm wild neil:

Andy!!! what are you twelve?
Avatar 6:15pm Cliff in Prague:

Did anybody watch the movie Primer? They built a time machine, then they sent the parts for a time machine back in time to build another time machine in the past.
  6:15pm woy:

Andy, Ken are you dying laughing right now?
  6:16pm ben:

long time listener first time robot caller, I love the show. quickest and most complete train wreck on 7 second delay. thank you
  ♥ 6:16pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back ten minutes and correct the spelling in my last post.
  6:16pm KM:

I may not always love you
But as long as there are stars above you
You never need to doubt it
I'll make you so sure about it
God only knows what I'd be without you
  6:17pm Commiebob:

If i had a time machine I'd go back 10 years and sieze the means of production
  6:17pm DAME-O':

Dunno what he got for mister roboto
  ♥ 6:17pm AndyBreckma:

I would use the time machine to hide from my personal trainer.
  6:17pm Sam:

And so in matters vegetable animal and mineral I am the very model of a modern major general
  6:17pm woy:

Was I waiting for this? It's darn midnight in Berlin. I need to work tomorrrow!
  6:17pm woy:

I love it
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:17pm WFMU listener WADE:

If I had a time machine I would expedite everyone's death.
  6:17pm Sean d:

if I was a time machine I would be a delorian not on the radio
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:17pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Can I get a change of voice please, or am i stuck with this one?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:18pm -Ken:

hELLO TO MY cO-hOST aNDY. sAY aNDY, CAN YOU TELL THE JOKE ABOUT THE PLAYBOY MAGAZINES AGAIN? i LOVE THAT JOKE. i ALSO LOVE YOU. lET ME LOVE YOU, aNDY.
  6:18pm Mr Fab:

Oh superman. oh judge. 0h mom and dad. mom and dad ah ah ah ah ah ah ah.
  6:18pm Sam:

I loved that story! It had something for everyone!
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:18pm andrew:

OK google, what will the weather be tomorrow
  6:18pm herb.nyc:

I'd go back in time and introduce the baby Donald Trump to Professor Dum Dum.
  ♥ 6:18pm AndyBreckma:

I use my time machine to go back ten years and go to Burger King and buy a double whopper for a dollar fifty!
Avatar 6:18pm Heyjoletsgo:

Will there be snacks in the time machine?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:18pm Greg from ZONE 5:

That was the first episode of the Twilight Zone. It was called "Where Is Everybody?" Several other episodes used time machines as a plot device, including "Once Upon A Time" starring Buster Keaton.
Avatar ♥ 6:18pm Jeff:

@Linda Lee - Expo '67 was in Montreal, not Toronto.

(I went there as a lad.)
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:18pm Folsom:

If i had a time machine i would go back in time to keep upsala college solvent.
Avatar 6:19pm Kolob Drone:

aaron whine much? el oh el sorry aaron i don't think it's fair you got that voice either but please keep calling in please please pretty please
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:19pm Sebastian:

if I had a time machine I'd go back to the time before they thought of the grandfather paradox and ruined all the fun.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:19pm common:

what is that watermellon doing there?
Avatar 6:19pm Cliff in Prague:

It's good that there's a nominal topic, or else everyone would post random crap just to hear what it sounds like through the speech synthesizer.
Avatar 6:19pm Linda Lee:

yes Jeff! Expo was held in Montreal. but the first choice was Toronto! smile emoji.
  6:19pm Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would travel back in time to acquire a listing of old sports results. I would then use this listing to acquire money and power, enabling robots to rule the future. I think this is only possible in a vehicle from the 80's.
  6:20pm Bklyn kid:

illtell you later
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:20pm Marcel M:

I once knew a man from Nantucket
  6:20pm ben:

crofundogamusticalistimumreprigamus
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:20pm sweeks:

ここにから私を出しなさい!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:20pm -Ken:

hELLO TO MY FRIEND aARON. jUST TYPE in a different name and you will be given a different voice.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:20pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd sell my time machine for a huge amount of money.
  6:20pm Leninluvr4:

If I had a time machine, I would put dope rims on it.
  6:20pm ScottC:

You can reduce your credit card payments with one easy monthly bill. Call now to take advantage of this one time offer from Robot Credit Doctors. We can have debt but we feel your pain. Call today!
  6:20pm woy:

I should've seen it coming
It should've sent me running
That's what I get for loving you
If I had a time machine…
  6:20pm sue:

I thought a time machine could not go back to a time before the invention of the time machine.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:21pm Marcel M:

I already mentioned that Twilight Zone episode.
Avatar 6:21pm Kolob Drone:

can SAM tryout for wake and bake? not that there's been anything wrong with the roster because they've been great.
Avatar ♥ 6:21pm Jeff:

Alexa, buy me a doll house!
  6:21pm Sean d:

if I was a real robot I would eat your cell phone
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:21pm dgg:

Vier Maurer saßen einst auf einem Dach.
Da sprach der erste: "Ach!"
Der zweite: "Wie ists möglich dann?"
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:21pm Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine, I'd time travel in the morning. I'd time travel in the evening. All over this land.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:21pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Happy birthday, Emily!
  ♥ 6:21pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and buy ten copies of the first Action comics and then I would sell them and use the money to redecorate the time machine.
  6:22pm ChomskyBot:

Suppose, for instance, that most of the methodological work in modern linguistics does not affect the structure of nondistinctness in the sense of distinctive feature theory.
  6:22pm DAME-O':

Who tooted
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:22pm -Ken:

i KNEW that guy from Nantucket too! He was the best. Oh, what I would give for another beautiful summer day lounging on the beach in nantucket.
  6:22pm Mr Fab:

I would go one minute into the future. Then I'd wait around and say, hey where were you guys?
Avatar 6:22pm Kolob Drone:

Satan oscillate my metallic sonatas
  6:22pm Torbjørn:

I was promised time travel boiler stories, but I haven't heard any yet. A boiler is a robot good of as anything, but do they get any respect ? Nope.
  6:22pm herb.nyc:

I'd go back in time and see what it's like to be in a Turkish prison.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:22pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

I'd go back and help Fred Trump get high enough in the Bund to be infamously Nazi instead of quietly so,.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:22pm maestroso:

I would use the time machine to go to all the concerts that I missed.
  6:23pm Robo Doc:

where we're going we don't need roads
  6:23pm Brett from Toronto:

I would go into the future to 7 p m so I didn't have to listen to this show
  6:23pm KM:

If I had a time machine I'd tell myself not to bother staying awake this late for this episode and just listen to the archive in the morning
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:23pm common:

SANCTUARY!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:23pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Neat! :)
  6:23pm ScottC:

Help! I'm stuck in the elevator with a sex crazed human!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:23pm WFMU listener WADE:

I can call spirits from the vasty deep
  ♥ 6:23pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and give the kid who took my wife Beth to her high school prom a giant wedgie.
  6:23pm ben:

if I had a time machine, I'd go back to the episode of 7 second delay that proved time travel doesn't exist, and claim all the pledged booty.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:23pm Marcel M:

Call Geico, 15 minutes could save you 15 percent or more. Do you see how easy that is, Ken?
  6:24pm flashbazbo:

If I had a time machine I would go back to before I had ever seen the Twilight Zone
  6:24pm sue:

Get off my lawn
  6:24pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Is this inspired by last nights Best Show?
  6:24pm DAME-O':

Alexa play WFMU
  6:24pm KM:

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer. Take one down and pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall
Avatar ♥ 6:24pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd skip ahead to the last page and see how it all ends.
  6:24pm Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go to the year 2125 to listen to a classic Seven Second Delay episode from 2021.
  6:25pm woy:

I wish you said something I miss you so much
Avatar 6:25pm Cliff in Prague:

Hey everybody, what's your favorite time-travel paradox? Like for example, you go back and get it on with your grandma when she was hot.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:25pm -Ken:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to the day before Hurricane Sandy, and then I would raise my boiler by four feet to keep it above the flood waters.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:25pm melinda:

Greg from Zone 5 used my idea. Darn.
  6:25pm shtus:

seven second delay is already a seven second time machine
Avatar 6:25pm Kolob Drone:

you will know it is time to turn the page when you hear the robot chup bleep blurp
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:26pm dgg:

if i had a time machine, i would tell Lee Harvey Oswald to call in sick.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:26pm Sebastian:

Is the board up for some dead air chicken?
  6:26pm Leninluvr4:

Time machines are love. Time machines are life.
Avatar 6:26pm Heyjoletsgo:

I would play this show to young Ken and Andy
  6:26pm woyt:

Ken, can you do this for the marathon run I think this would be a massive success
  6:26pm Brett from Toronto:

i love ken and i kind of love andy
  6:26pm Torbjørn:

Speak up, robot, speak up. Speak up ? Goodbye.
Avatar 6:26pm Linda Lee:

trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth. smile emoji?
  ♥ 6:26pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to Hurricane Sandy and piss into the wind, just for kicks and giggles
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:26pm brendanswfmuaccount:

If I had a time machine, I would go to Dealey Plaza in Dallas on November 22nd 1963. I wouldn't stop anything, just want to see if Oswald actually shot JFK.
Avatar ♥ 6:26pm βrian:

If I had a thyme machine, I would use it to make eggs provençal.
  6:27pm vo:

if I had a time machine I would rewrite the if I had a hammer song
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:27pm Folsom:

If I was ken with a time machine, I would buy event insurance for the record fair.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:27pm Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine I would watch every episode of the Twilight Zone over again for the first time.
  6:27pm castor:

Double indexicality with same intentional content
  6:27pm Sam:

This show is in violation of FCC standards. It will now end. Goodbye.
  6:27pm Wilson.:

If I had a time machine, I would go back to the 1960s and try some bomb ass LSD
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:27pm sweeks:

Can I go back to the beginning of the universe? Or would I be destroyed in outer space?
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:27pm Walt:

I would go back to the SSD where (I think) Andy came up with the name "Wake and Bake" and try to talk him out of it. Also I would try to find out which show Ken said "She would tear my skin off and wear it" because I'd like to hear that again. Not sure if the time machine would help with this one.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:27pm WFMU listener WADE:

Hey! Stop Smoking! Come back from your cigarette break! The show started! We are stuck!
  6:28pm KM:

Didn't we have some fun, though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said "Goodbye", and you were like, "No way!" And then I was all, "We pretended we were going to murder you." That was great.
  6:28pm Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd travel to the future to read the godang Seven Second Delay comic book.
  6:28pm Matti:

I'd go back to my ancestral home in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:28pm common:

what we need here is a little common zen savvy
  ♥ 6:28pm AndyBreckma:

If I had time machine I would go back to my first date with Beth and fart less.
  6:28pm DAME-O':

One smart fellow he felt smart two smart fellows they felt smart three smart fellows they all felt smart
  6:28pm index:

Let's use a time machine to invent a time machine- machine - mama
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:28pm Ken:

I can not believe how many people I am banning tonight. I almost banned Andy.
  6:28pm Frank:

Hello, this is the central scrutinizer, where is Si Bogg? I need you so bad
  6:28pm ScottC:

Noe really! This is no joke I AM STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR WITH A WOMEN WITH 6 HANDS!
  6:29pm Sean d:

you are now going to take quantum leap into the grand canyon
  6:29pm sue:

I would go back in time to join that Russian pee party.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm Greg from ZONE 5:

I second the motion for more common.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm WFMU listener WADE:

It is so anonymous. I still can't be honest with you.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm MD:

According to Einstein's Theories it is impossible to go back before the creation of the time machine...sorry but this show is as absurd as Donald Trump as President...Impossible...
Avatar 6:29pm Cliff in Prague:

Ken, you expect too much of the 7SD listenership.
  6:29pm castor:

If I had a time machine I would fiddle with Nero while Rome burned
  6:29pm Brett from Toronto:

daisy, daisy give me your heart to do, i'm half crazy hopeful in love with uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
  ♥ 6:29pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine, I would go back 30 years and write the music that is being played in the backround now, and then sue W F M U for a trillion dollars
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd enter Harry Potter as a registered trademark®™.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

WFMU listener WADE:
Why, so can I, or so can any man;
But will they come more than once when you do call for them?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:29pm Folsom:

@fofo I forgot about the comic book. Is that ever coming out?
  6:30pm Sam:

Professor what's another word for pirate treasure? Why I think it's booty, booty, wick wicka wicka booty, that's what it is.
Avatar 6:30pm Kolob Drone:

i'd go back to one of the dave matthews concerts i went to and slap myself in my dumb young face and tell me i just wasted my money and to trust me even though i have less hair
Avatar ♥ 6:30pm Jeff:

If I had a time machine I would keep going back, killing butterflies, and seeing what got weird when I returned.
  6:30pm KM:

Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct
  6:30pm Swagadocious:

If I had a time machine I would go back in time with a camera and prove that trump was born from a orangutan. And to distory all humans
Avatar ♥ 6:31pm βrian:

Still, how would one describe a French seal balancing a ball on it's nose?
  6:31pm Torbjørn:

As any self-respecting robot, I of course have a time machine. It produces time, and where I to disable it, less time would be produced. This can be observed as gravity waves and quantum non-locality.
  6:31pm flashbazbo:

I would go back to November 9 and do more door to door campaigning for hillary
Avatar 6:31pm Cliff in Prague:

I would go back to the founding of Llanfh and tell them to use a shorter name, because in the future computers won't know how to pronounce Welsh.
  6:31pm C in Thailand:

Let's not remember to forget that best time machines are the ones that work with the minimalistness of maintenance.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:31pm Marcel M:

Ken, 15 minutes could save you 15 percent or less on car insurance with Geico... just try saying it.
Avatar ♥ 6:32pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and teach young Don T. how to meditate.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:32pm Nick the Bard:

I'd go back in smack Einstein in the back of the head with a newspaper for being a stuck up yo-yo
  6:32pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

What is the comment count up to. Ken?
  6:32pm Brett from Toronto:

did andy fart?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:32pm Devin B.:

Dear,Friends,Do you know what is the most needed to carry in the summer ? It can Anti UV,make you still so cool under the hot sun.
  ♥ 6:32pm AndyBreckma:

This is Andy and I just want to say how proud I am of my son Josh who wrote the voice to text program for this show. I love you Josh
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:32pm bill:

wir sind roboten
  6:32pm index:

LUKE I am your father!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:33pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd invest in leisure suits in 1975 and sell in 1979.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:33pm MD:

i would go back to when i created the time machine and them destroy it.....love love love love love love love love...
  6:33pm flashbazbo:

I would go back and defeat the nazis, even though there would be one more butterfly in the world.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:33pm Ken-:

This is Ken. My name is Ken. There have been 356 comments so far and I have banned 18 different people.
Avatar 6:34pm Linda Lee:

is minimalistness the minimum? smile emoji.
  ♥ 6:34pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time I would use it to sneak into the zoo. You heard me. I would use it to sneak into the zoo. Do you understand what I am saying? I would sneak into the zoo.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:34pm dgg:

i would go back in time and collect one dog of each of the dog changes between pug and wolf and put them in a zoo.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:34pm Prodigal Listener:

I would go back and bump off H. G. Wells before he could write "The Time Machine."
  6:34pm will:

How are you holding up? 'Cause I'm a potato!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:34pm Sebastian:

if I had a time machine, I'd hammer in the morning.
  6:34pm sophie b:

if I had a time machine I would buy a lot of 5 and ten cent stuff from back then and bring the stuff back and then go to Disney world. yay
Avatar 6:34pm Kolob Drone:

I love Josh too. I love you Josh.
  6:34pm Robbie The Robot:

I would go back to the Lost In Space set and Make a move on that doe eyed chick in the short glitter tunic with the antenna stick out of her head!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:34pm WFMU listener WADE:

I contracted Oral Herpes from my aunt. My family was visiting our relatives in Louisiana. My aunt assumed wrongly the transmission process by which Herpes moves. It hides in my nervous system.

I am having an outbreak right now. It is a big outbreak and my upper lip tingles terribly. By tomorrow morning, I will have highly visible sores.

Please. Don't stare.
  6:35pm davee:

Andy Breckman smells funny!
  6:35pm DAME-O':

I would go forward and see if I ever get my FMU swag for being a donor
  ♥ 6:35pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back and find Thomas Jefferson and see if he was really Puerto Rican.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:35pm common:

i think i may be banned. SANCTUARY!
  6:35pm beth landau:

Josh is brilliant
  6:35pm Brett from Toronto:

we all love josh. more than andy. the show should be Ken and Josh. not Ken and Andy
  6:35pm Frankie:

Hello, its me again ,,, the central scrutinizer . ?!/// Where are my pants?
Avatar 6:35pm Chris M.:

i would like to go back in time and meet Sherlock Holmes and Watson. they seem like great dudes to hang out with.
  6:35pm Hak:

Nice yo sweet program I'd go back in time and re learn that this is a dope program
  6:36pm Cher:

If I could turn back time, if I could find a way. I'd take back those words that hurt you, and you'd stay.
  6:36pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Josh, can you write me a text to speech system which works better?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:36pm joe mulligan:

I'm guessing the rambling Miami caller doesn't use the comments board. that would be good for us robots. I could already use some chloraseptic.
  6:36pm Sean d:

i! am singing? a song!
  ♥ 6:36pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to 1934 before World War Two and bet twenty dollars on the Allies.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:36pm Ken--:

This is Ken again. And also, my name is Ken. I just want to say this: I love Josh Breckman more than anybody. More than Andy. More than Mary. More than anybody. Nobody, and I mean nobody loves Josh more than I do.
  6:36pm Gradio:

I'd go back and turn right on maple street
  6:36pm shtus:

does the fcc allow milf?
i once heard it censored to mil
  6:36pm davee:

Thomas Jefferson was black!
  6:37pm Able:

If I had a million dollars, I'd buy a time machine
  6:37pm Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd ask it: What time is it?
  6:37pm KM:

with a time machine I would go back to every year seven second delay didn't do their premium and pledge to a different show
  6:37pm ?:

Hello ron. It is nick from the future.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:37pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

I'd keep the Tsarist police from killing Lenin's brother, maybe avoiding Bolshevism, Fascism, and Nazism… and watch the FRESH hells released instead.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:37pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd convince a young Lemmy to stop smoking.
Avatar 6:37pm Cliff in Prague:

Josh Breckman is a mensch for doing this.
  6:37pm misterpickles69:

If I had a time machine i'd go back and change the voice this is spoken in.
  6:37pm davee:

My sister was an only child!
Avatar 6:37pm Linda Lee:

Andy! you sound hot!! smile emoji.
  6:38pm Index:

Hi dear, hello, hi - you're nice very verrrrry nice
Avatar ♥ 6:38pm βrian:

L Lysine is your friend! 4000 mg per day.
Avatar ♥ 6:38pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd page Mr. Ahclem.
  6:38pm Robbie The Robot:

Duh People - hello? Lotto ticket? You know LOTTO TICKET?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:38pm WFMU listener WADE:

Good to hear from you, Ken.
  6:38pm Swagadocious:

Katie what would you do with a time machine?
  6:38pm davee:

Ken who?
  6:39pm castor:

If I had a time machine I would go back to the most glorious most magnificent most sacred eternal nothingness that is at the center of our meaningless existence. Then I would use my time machine to reproduce all sorts of new times, times without space and with extra dungeons for shadow puppets
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:39pm WFMU listener WADE:

Good to hear from everyone!
  ♥ 6:39pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine and wait for George Washington to throw that silver dollar across the Delaware River then I would find the silver dollar and keep it. Yipee! I have a dollar!
  6:39pm Hypertoast:

If I had a time machine I would wait on that island and stop the coconut crabs from eating Amelia Earhart
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:39pm Prodigal Listener:

I would go back and -- GO TO HELL!
  6:39pm Torbjørn:

I wish Robot-Nick the bard would open the phone lines, but only to non-human callers. This is now a safe space for non-humans. Machines only, capable of time-travel or not.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:39pm melinda:

Oral herpes listener should also avoid chocolate and citrus.
  6:39pm Wilson.:

If I had a time machine, I would have Jane Mansfield fist fight Andy
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:39pm WFMU listener WADE:

Hey everybody, Keep driving my cats crazy. Keep the comments coming
Avatar ♥ 6:39pm βrian:

We have a time machine on the kitchen wall. But we call it a clock.
  6:40pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

I dare Ken to ban himself
  6:40pm davee:

Jacob Evans is brilliant!
  6:40pm sue:

There is 20 minutes left of this shit
  6:40pm Hak:

If I had a time machine... yes, a beautiful, beautiful time machine.... I would go back and assemble the masses for my wills... yes....
Avatar 6:40pm Kolob Drone:

i love how people use this fun thing on a fun show to complain about getting free stuff from the station. great job humans.
  6:40pm Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to see Andy with long hair.
  6:40pm misterpickles69:

What's the time? It's time to buy ale!
  6:40pm Gradio:

Rerouting. Make a u turn. Then in .7 miles turn left on maple street. You have arrived at your destination.
  6:40pm Frankzy:

give mee thee chromium leg guh
  6:41pm C in Thailand:

If I had a time machine, I would go into the past and remind myself to do all the things I did in my life. Then my life would be completely complete.
  6:41pm Sean d:

if I had a time machine I would go back, back to the future
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:41pm common:

it was a baby animal
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:41pm Greg from ZONE 5:

Paging Mr. Herman.
Mr. Herman, you have a telephone call at the front desk.
  6:41pm beth:

If I had a time machine I'd save Buddy Holly. It's not much, but it's something. And the guy who sang La Bamba too.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:41pm Folsom:

Calling Hanover Fiste.
  6:41pm Brett from Toronto:

remember that episode of Monk when Mr. Monk becomes a substitute teacher? Neither do I
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:41pm Sebastian:

If I had a time machine I'd use it to travel to the end of this episode as quickly as possible.
Avatar 6:41pm Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine I would use the principle of relativity to convert it into a space machine
  6:42pm Index:

Exterminate exterminate exterminate
Avatar ♥ 6:42pm βrian:

If I had a time machine, I would make langoustines braised in garlic, white wine, and crushed red pepper.
  6:42pm flashbazbo:

I'd go back to the early 70s when Andy's dream of playing music was still alive.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:42pm Ken--:

I would become a crab and move to the island that Amelia Earhardt crashed on, and I would wait for Amelia to crash land on the island and then me and all my crab friends would eat her up. mm yummy.
  6:42pm ?:

Hello, greetings ron. This is nick from the future speaking.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:42pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Sternn!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:42pm dgg:

I would go back to the 1800s and invent internet memes
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:42pm aratuk:

If I had a time machine, I would go back and tell Richard Nixon, "For the sake of varied texture, I thank the lord you were made inhumane."
  ♥ 6:42pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would learn a magic trick then practice that magic trick then go back to nineteen sixty three and show Joey Heatherton the magic trick
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:43pm WFMU listener WADE:

Melinda, Melinda, Melinda. Incoming transmission. Melinda. Thank you for your advice. I have also heard Lysine. Lysine.
Avatar ♥ 6:43pm βrian:

Mind the gap.
Mind the lapse at the synapse.
  6:43pm bill:

where my at
  6:43pm castor:

If I had a time machine I would make sure Alexander Berkman succeeded in murdering Henry Clay Frick and every other capitalist pig in America.
  6:43pm Hak:

Download complete. Personal banking pin numbers transfered. Thank you.
  6:43pm misterpickles69:

The white zone is for loading and unloading only. No parking.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:43pm Folsom:

Coin detected in pocket.
  6:43pm ?:

Just what do you think you're doing Dave. Stop. Dave. I can feel my mind going. Stop. Dave... Would you stop
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:44pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd tell Captain Edward J. Smith to slow down just a tad and keep a sharp eye out for icebergs.
  6:44pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

Kolab, if they ever send that free stuff, we never would have to complain about said free stuff.
  6:44pm davee:

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:44pm Kat in Chicago:

we are sedimentary rocks
  6:44pm Sean d:

I should not have let marty drive the time machine
  ♥ 6:44pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would borrow twenty dollars from Buddy Holly just before he died. Yippee. I just made twenty dollars.
  6:44pm Gradio:

Please leave a message after the beep. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
  6:44pm misterpickles69:

The entire show was made worth it with that pee wee's big adventure quote.
  6:44pm Hypertoast:

If I had a time machine I would go back and clone thirty Amelia Earharts and we would have our revenge on the crabs. I would also need a clone machine
  6:44pm Robbie The Robot:

If I had a time machine I would bury the body deeper so when the pipes freeze I don't need to worry about killing another plumber...
  6:44pm beth:

If I had a time machine, I'd go back and congratulate George Orwell and tell him all that he got a lot right. I'd also tell him about the internet because that would blow his mind. Then, he would have to alter 1984 a bit.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:44pm Prodigal Listener:

If I had a time machine, I would I machine time a had I if.
  6:45pm Karen:

I would help the guy with the pony
  6:45pm Aardvark:

I don't know much about computers, other than the one we got at my house, and my mom put a couple of games on there and I play 'em.
Avatar 6:45pm Linda Lee:

i have realized that the past and the future are real illusions.
  6:46pm KM:

I love mandy
  ♥ 6:46pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go to Folk City in nineteen sixty two and heckle Bob Dylan. Get off the stage, you stupid hillbilly
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:46pm Ken From Hyde Park:

I'd start a chain of time machine repair shops.
  6:46pm Swagadocious:

How many wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood
  6:46pm Danne D:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to Sunday right before breaking out Sh*t Happens for my board game friends (turned out it didn't mesh with their sensibilities)

Take one guess about which card led to the vote by them to abandon the game...
  6:46pm beth:

I would take my time machine and tell Joey Heatherton to leave Andy Breckman alone. He's taken! He is mine!
  6:46pm Fofo (:

If I had a time machine I'd go back to the beginning of this sentence.
  6:46pm Sean d:

if they still had phone booths then I could time travel... excellent...guitar noise
  6:46pm Slapdaddy:

If I had a time daddy I'd daddy back to daddy and bet on daddy for daddy
  6:46pm Ben:

The red zone is for loading and unloading only.
  6:46pm Danne D:

(ps I like the game)
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:46pm sweeks:

I feel pretty. Oh so pretty.
  6:46pm herb.nyc:

I would tell everyone on the dock of the Titanic to save money and buy one way only.
Avatar 6:47pm Kolob Drone:

i've had this cliff bar broiling in my left front pocket since tuesday. i believe the broil session has been completed. i will now eat the processed bar food .
  6:47pm shtus:

yes a sample i may be
but its still your passport i must see
  6:47pm Wilson.:

Dave the spazz rules!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:47pm Folsom:

Countdown humanoid countdown intruder
Avatar ♥ 6:47pm Jeff:

How much time, could a time machine time, if a time machine could machine time?
  6:47pm C in Thailand:

If I had a time machine, I would prevent Jermaine Jackson from committing suicide so that I could hear him sing "Why don't you do what did when you did what you did to me" one more time.
Avatar 6:47pm Cliff in Prague:

I have a vegan friend who gives me Clif Bars as a joke
Avatar 6:48pm Linda Lee:

if a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would chuck all the wood it could chuck. smile emoji.
  6:48pm ?:

If i had a time machine I would smoke in a Denny's
  6:48pm homeland security:

All unattended packages will be detonated by the bomb squad...
  6:48pm Able:

You're Listening to 104.3 WAXQ, New York's Classic Rock!
Avatar ♥ 6:48pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd solve the question of Why does the Porridge Bird lay his egg in the air?

Dunno if that requires forward or backward time travel.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:48pm brendanswfmuaccount:

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.
  6:48pm Sam:

I am a robot. I want to have sex with other robots who are of a slightly different shape than I am.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:48pm Ken--:

Hello again. This is Ken and also, ken is my name. We have never had this many female listeners. That makes me happy.
  6:48pm MrFab:

Man, this song playing in the background is really long.
  6:49pm Sam:

Carmela, will you PLEASE SHUT THE DOOR!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:49pm common:

one hot doggie you shall havey
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:49pm Prodigal Listener:

If I had a time machine, I would make that house miss the Wicked Witch of the West and save everyone a lot of trouble.
  6:49pm Brett from Toronto:

that face when crying jordan did a barrell roll, riiiight? memes are still cool right? you see what I did there? That's my time.
  6:49pm castor:

I love you, time machine
Avatar ♥ 6:49pm Jeff:

How much ground, could a ground hog hog?
  ♥ 6:49pm AndyBreckma:

If I had a time machine I would go back to nine months before I was born and make a hundred percent sure my daddy is my daddy. Also, it would be fun to watch.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:49pm DMcK:

I would go back to caveman days and let Bertha Butt sock it to me
Avatar 6:49pm Cliff in Prague:

*laughing with tears emoji*
  6:49pm Veganfrjend4:

Id go back and give out cliff bars to myself
  6:49pm Gradio:

Please place item in bagging area. Now remove item from bagging area
Avatar 6:49pm Kolob Drone:

i'd go back to christmas 2016 and attempt to purchase who tooted much earlier in the season because by december 15th they were all sold out world darn wide
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:50pm dgg:

if i had a time machine, I'd sell rides in it to prisoners for cigarettes.
  6:50pm KM:

if I had a time machine I would go back and save all of OCDJ's shows before the archive was taken down
  6:50pm simon:

long time robot, first time caller.
  6:50pm Brett from Toronto:

What's your name again, Ken?
  6:50pm graph man:

I would make Paul Simon wear a vest and make Art Garfunkel wear a baseball cap
  6:50pm Sean d:

a clock is a time machine
  6:50pm sue:

If I had a time machine I would go to the place. What was that place? What are we talking about? Argh!
  6:50pm ?:

Error four oh four. Emotions not found.
Avatar 6:50pm Linda Lee:

i've never been this female before, Ken. tee hee.
  6:50pm Walt:

If I had a time machine, I would love you more.
  6:50pm Sam:

Traffic and weather together
  6:50pm ?:

You have five seconds before self destruct
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:50pm Kat in Chicago:

Ladies love robots
  6:50pm davee:

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
  6:50pm herb.nyc:

I am woman, hear me roar.
  6:50pm MrFab:

Hey baby. are you robot curious?
  6:50pm DAME-O':

I would have never paid money to see Rat Race
  6:50pm Aardvarkk:

Hey kid I'm a computer stop all the downloading
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:51pm aratuk:

Keep rollin', rollin', rollin',
Though the streams are swollen,
Keep them dogies rollin', rawhide.
Through rain and wind and weather,
Hell bent for leather,
Wishin' my gal was by my side.
All the things I'm missin',
Good vittles, love and kissin',
Are waiting at the end of my ride.
  6:51pm Sam:

My girlfriend's so ugly, I took her to the beach. They asked me what I used for bait!
  6:51pm davee:

Hey!
  6:51pm shtus:

id go back to have sex with people from 5000 years ago
Avatar ♥ 6:51pm Marshall Stacks:

I'd go back and meet the inventor of paleo cuisine.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:51pm Ken From Hyde Park:

All your base are belong to us.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:51pm sweeks:

I bet Andy loves this. He got to stay home and masturbate.
  ♥ 6:51pm AndyBreckma:

I just want to thank my Josh Breckman again-- Josh you are amazing
  6:51pm Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would travel time and satisfy my wants in all times. Since I can want a time machine, this must mean I haven't had one, and can't have one in the future.
Avatar 6:51pm geezerette:

If I had a time machine I would make more time.
  6:51pm davee:

Andy smells funny!
  6:51pm Veganfrjend4:

I'd go back and tell everybody how to take dope selfies
  6:51pm Brett from Toronto:

Andy sing us a show tune
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:51pm aratuk:

Move 'em on, head 'em up,
Head 'em up, move 'em on,
Move 'em on, head 'em up, rawhide!
Head 'em out, ride 'em in,
Ride 'em in, let 'em out,
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, rawhide!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:51pm Sebastian:

timeloop timeloop
  6:51pm Walt:

Josh Breckman, this show is amazing.
  6:52pm Ian:

My hovercraft never actually had any eels in it at all
  6:52pm Danne D:

PS it was the bear card. Of course it was the bear card.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:52pm Greg from ZONE 5:

If I had a time machine I would travel to four hours from now when I'm finished with work and home in bed.
  6:52pm Tommy Jack Haynes:

If I had a time machine , I'd just go back in time
  6:52pm davee:

Andy smells funny!
Avatar 6:52pm Cliff in Prague:

I promise not to use the computer voice to inappropriately hit on all of the female listeners here now.
  6:52pm HuskLife:

feel the sting
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:52pm Marcel M:

Ken.. 15 minutes or less.. car insurance... anything... its SO EASY!
  6:52pm orpheusviking:

if I had a time machine I would make black metal replace smooth jazz in the 70s, also make the eagles disappear and I would tell don McLean what for.
  6:52pm Tommy Jack Haynes:

.....Because I don't like this time
Avatar ♥ 6:52pm Marshall Stacks:

Pay leo, pay leo, pay leo.
  6:53pm eye in the sky:

This makes me want net neutrality.
  6:53pm davee:

Time is not relevant!
Avatar 6:53pm Kolob Drone:

selfey sticks for everyone!
  6:53pm ?:

If anyone can hear me out there, I am the only man left in the future. Please help
  6:53pm Spike:

If I had a time machine, I'd come and settle the score up in there
Avatar ♥ 6:53pm βrian:

I am transported to 1995 when I first played with the Mac text-to-speech feature. I used it to call my cat.
  6:53pm Blunt:

I'd go back and do the same exact thing
Avatar 6:53pm Linda Lee:

if i could turn back time, if i could find a way, i'd take back all the words that made you cry. Cher emoji.
  6:53pm Able:

I said come on Fhqwhgads, come on Fhqwhgads!
Everybody to the limit
Who's that? It's to the limit.
Everybody come on Fhqwhgads!
Avatar ♥ 6:53pm pocket vito:

Drove the chevy to the levy and the levy was, something.
  6:53pm davee:

Acky, acky, foot bang zoot!
  6:53pm Zephyr:

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you
Avatar 6:53pm Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine I would make sure Pat Metheny would interecept Don Felder before he could record the track "Heavy Metal", so that I would not have to hear it every single Tuesday
  6:54pm Bernadette:

I dont often use time machines, but when ido, i have to stop saying i dont use them that often
  6:54pm woyt:

I just tuned back to last years episode :)
  6:54pm Hypertoast:

If I had a washing machine I would go back in time with a bunch of clean shirts
  6:54pm castor:

If I had a time machine I would relive the same day over and over and over again to infinity
  6:54pm Torbjørn:

Time-machine keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping. Into the future.
  6:54pm Walt:

But remember, there will never be any more perfection than there is now,
Nor any more heaven or hell than there is now.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:54pm Ken--:

Hello, my name is Ken and I am ken. Can somebody do the top of the hour legal Eye Dee?
Avatar ♥ 6:54pm βrian:

@Cliff: Flog yourself with spruce boughs, and you will be good to go.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:54pm common:

tiny face, silent scream.
  6:54pm davee:

masturbation is not relevant!
  6:54pm HuskLife:

C low green has T Rex arms
  6:54pm Spike:

Hey sonny, its me
  6:54pm KM:

This was a triumph. I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
  6:55pm davee:

Yo, eat my shorts!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:55pm Ken From Hyde Park:

This has been an Alfred E. Newman production.
  6:55pm Spike:

I'm a car too, you know
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:55pm dgg:

If i had a time machine i'd go into the future and brag about my sober time.
  6:55pm Ian:

If I had a time machine, I would wear an onion in my belt loop, which was the style at the time
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:55pm Prodigal Listener:

If my time machine started skipping, I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would
  6:55pm Un whiney Aaron In Minneapolis:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
  6:55pm eye in the sky:

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh no I have an oil leak!
Avatar 6:55pm Kolob Drone:

bop bop ditty ditty bop bop doo. bop bop ditty ditty bop bop doo. bitty bitty bop bop
  6:55pm ?:

I don't have the time
Avatar ♥ 6:55pm pocket vito:

Ha ha! That was a hilarious anecdote! Now you tell one!
  6:55pm Admiral a:

Fitter. happier. more productive.
  6:55pm Torbjørn:

You have been listening to non-human, time-machine-oriented freeform radio. This is WFMU East Orange, WMFU Mount Hope and wfmu.org on the world wide web.
  6:55pm Spike:

I am the Octopus
  6:55pm Able:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
Avatar ♥ 6:55pm ?</html>:

Did you check for XSS attacks?
  Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:55pm wendyfaye:

I can type anything!! (for my 6yo)
Avatar 6:55pm Cliff in Prague:

If I had a time machine, I would create a singularity just for the hell of it.
  6:55pm will:

I wish that I could turn back time. Because now the guilt is all mine
  6:55pm davee:

No time machines available!
  6:55pm Mork Fromork:

The robots have already taken over. The robots are . . . us!
Avatar 6:55pm Linda Lee:

i coulda been a contender.
  6:55pm Walt:

If I had a time machine, I would make sure Andy saw the last part of the Packers Cowboys game from Sunday.
  6:56pm woyt:

WFMU-FM is a listener-supported, non-commercial radio station broadcasting at 91.1 Mhz FM in Jersey City, NJ, right across the Hudson from lower Manhattan. It is currently the longest running freeform radio station in the United States.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:56pm Devin B.:

Dis dubba you effem you eest oh range dubba you emmeff you mont hoop an roclan con tee at nein zee row dot won
  6:56pm Spike:

If time doozy i had, Id do some spins
  6:56pm Rai:

You're an angel witch, you're an angel witch
You're an angel witch, you're an angel witch
  6:56pm Ian:

Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine, Number Nine
  6:56pm ?:

You've got mail
Avatar ♥ 6:56pm Jeff:

No, it's Girls On Fire!
  6:56pm graph man:

one of these voices sounds like Michelle from shut up weirdo
  6:56pm ov:

I would say hi to my friend alex over and over again. hi alex Hi alex Hu alex you alex
  6:56pm davee:

Good nigh Ken and thank you!
  6:56pm chuck:

Doe a deer a female deer. Ray a drop of golden sun. Me a name I call my self. Fa a long long way to run. So A needle pulling thread. La the note that follows so. Tea you eat with jam and bread. Which brings us back to doe doe doe doe.
  6:56pm Spike:

Im looking for sprite sponsorship
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:56pm Lee B:

I would go back to the days of WXHD
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:56pm Greg from ZONE 5:

...and for the douchebags in Rockland County at 91.9.
  6:56pm Walt:

Josh is a genius!
  6:56pm Santos L Halper:

Y'all come back now, y'hear?
  6:56pm Fofo (:

You are listening to WFMU something something, something something.
  6:56pm Torbjørn:

If I had a time machine, I would thank Amy Vogle all of the time.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:56pm Sebastian:

All things began in order, so shall they end, and so shall they begin again.
  6:56pm DAME-O':

Alexa play WFMU
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:56pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

你好我们的中国朋友
  6:57pm Brett from Toronto:

hurry up everyone get off your funniest comments
Avatar ♥ 6:57pm pocket vito:

And for all you jerkoffs in Rockland County at 91.9 FM. Stay tuned for Supergirls gone wild with Cindy and Pirscilla
  6:57pm Tommy Jack Haynes:

I would go back a re-do some my FMU comment board comments
  6:57pm Blunt4errybody:

Seize the means, comrads!
  6:57pm flashbazbo:

Doodlyaby chicken funt
  6:57pm davee:

NOT!
  6:57pm shtus:

nachum
  6:57pm woyt:

Bikini girladies
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:57pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Again, thank you, Amy Vogel.
  6:57pm eye in the sky:

Ha ha ha Mr. Bond now you will die
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:57pm (((Murakami Whywolf):

你好我们的中国朋友
  6:57pm Spike:

Are you sponsored?
  6:57pm HuskLife:

Until the swelling goes down
Avatar 6:57pm Kolob Drone:

great show can't believe i got through
  6:58pm Spike:

Who wants a pizza ball
  6:58pm Fofo (:

And Thanks to Amy Vogel
Avatar ♥ 6:58pm pocket vito:

You're on the list listen at the end of the hour and you might win a t shirt
  6:58pm davee:

I did not know that! thank you!
  6:58pm woyt:

Amy Vogel, we are so thankful
Avatar ♥ 6:58pm βrian:

The peckers played the coy boys??
Avatar ♥ 6:58pm pocket vito:

You're on the list listen at the end of the hour and you might win a t shirt
Avatar 6:58pm Cliff in Prague:

Thank you Andy and Ken and Josh!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:58pm Devin B.:

onda innanets at dubba effem you dot oh are gee
Avatar ♥ 6:58pm βrian:

Yah, Yah. Track 29!
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:58pm aratuk:

Workin' hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin' anythin' to roll the dice
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on, and on, and on
  6:58pm Massive dumpster:

You're gonna feel my foot
  6:58pm JakeGould:

You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over. You have lost. Game over.
Avatar 6:58pm Linda Lee:

You are listening to W F M U East Orange, W M F U Mount Hope, online at w f m u dot o r g, and in rocklund county at ninety one, point nine F M. Stay tuned to In Real Life with the Bikini girls.
  6:59pm HuskLife:

Hi BJ all the way
  6:59pm benny:

Push me. And then just touch me. Till I can get my. Satisfaction.
  6:59pm Massive dumpster:

Im coming for you, buster
  6:59pm Zephyr:

This is the central scrutinizer . . .
That was joe's first confrontation with the law.
Naturally, we were easy on him.
One of our friendly counselors gave him
A do-nut . . . and told him to
Stick closer to church-oriented social activities.
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 6:59pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Don't forget to treat yourself to a nice refreshing Pepsi.
Avatar 6:59pm groucho:

I love you all more than anything
  7:00pm Massive dumpster:

Freedom ain't not free
  7:00pm Able:

Is it over yet?
  7:00pm Brett from Toronto:

this was so fun
  7:00pm woyt:

Again the same next week pls
  7:01pm Rai:

Ken, what was the comment count by the end of the show? How many were broadcast?
Avatar Swag For Life Member ♥ 7:01pm (Murakami Whywolf))):

Reïfication is no thing.
Avatar 10:05am orpheusviking:

ha ha
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