Options Shut Up, Weirdo with Frangry and Michele with One "L": Playlist from April 27, 2012 Options

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Just two girls. Having a good time. On a Friday night. (Visit homepage.)

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Options April 27, 2012: The Law

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Artist Track
Andy & Frangry  Shut Up, Weirdo   Options

Listener comments!

  6:01pm stinkbug:

  6:01pm Danne D:

Hi Andy :)
Hi Frangry :) <333
Hi Weirdos :)
  6:01pm G:

Awaiting announcement of the failed premise!
Avatar 6:01pm FRANGRY:

  6:02pm robyn:

This Court is now in session.
  6:02pm Pinball:

  6:02pm G:

Frangry: "Turn me on, Andy!"
  6:02pm Johnny Muller:

Judge Frangry and Bailiff Andy
  6:02pm Danne D:

Awww poor Frangry :(
  6:03pm Colonel Kurtz:

What do you call it when the assassins accuse the assassin? A lie. A lie and we have to be merciful.
  6:03pm listener mark:

Hi Frangry
Hi Andrew
Hi Weirdos
  6:03pm robyn:

well, i think rubbing your mom with vicks vapo rub is against the law...
  6:03pm Tylene:

Phlegm girl wid da rub!
  6:03pm Danne D:

Wonder what laws Frangry would make regarding people peeing on each other
  6:04pm G:

Make stupidity beyond a certain level a capital crime. Would greatly raise the average IQ over time.
  6:04pm Colonel Kurtz:

They train young men to drop fire on people. But their commanders won't allow them to write 'fuck' on their airplanes because it is obscene.
  6:04pm Female Airline Passnger:

Chop off the hand for gum theft, like in sharia law.
  6:05pm miss cheri:

hey good evening danne and all!!
  6:05pm giraffe-o:

Newt Gingrich has his wife rub metamucil on his bare bottom for kicks
  6:05pm stinkbug:

[insert law about stealing gum on planes]
  6:06pm Spike:

Heterosexual relationships should be against the law.
  6:06pm Colonel Kurtz:

I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream; that's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight razor... and surviving.
  6:07pm Danne D:

hey cheri
  6:07pm Female Airline Passenger:

cherio loves "the cake", just ask her
  6:07pm disastrogirl:

Can we just make pot legal already? It's so ridiculous that booze is OK and pot isn't. I don't even SMOKE the stuff and I want to see it legalized.
  6:07pm Michele:

Who was the cake for?
  6:08pm Female Airline Passenger:

the pee incident is UNFORGETTABLE
  6:08pm antwan:

I feel like now would be a good time to check: is murder technically against the law?
  6:08pm robyn:

no it wouldn't frangry. test tube babies for everyone.
  6:09pm Danne D:

Frangria Law
  6:09pm listener mark:

A baby license!
  6:10pm G:

My grandfather was an administrative law judge for the National Labor Relations Board, and decided a very famous case. That means I have an analytical mind, but not that I know jacks--- about legal technicalities.
  6:10pm NoBeE:

Stadium mating only.
  6:10pm Danne D:

Hi Michele :) When is the next Michele show gonna be?
  6:11pm Shut up Nanny State:

Ten minutes in and you're already talking eugenics. Not promising.
  6:11pm Danne D:

@S-u-N-S seriously, the over/under was like 7 1/2 minutes
  6:12pm G:

Bossy people tend to go into government. If only people would vote for openminded candidates.
  6:13pm Danne D:

KIDS! Andy and Frangry don't make me turn this show around! Play nice!
  6:13pm Colonel Kurtz:

Could Andy explain how a Bill becomes a Law?
  6:14pm stinkbug:

sitcom idea: Frangry as DMV worker
  6:14pm Danne D:

No comment from me about political types and sanity.
  6:14pm Johnny Muller:

exempt from capital punishment if while on death row, the convict can complete a rubik's cube
  6:14pm Colonel Kurtz:

Why is Frangry so Copo-phobic???
  6:14pm robyn:

if i were to write three laws, they would be: 1) you can't talk about running/jogging. no one cares about how far you ran today. 2) don't talk about things you have already posted on facebook. if no one cared there, no one cares here. 3) ban marriage.
  6:15pm NoBeE:

@stinkbug: yeah!
  6:15pm listener mark:

A baby license, you get one baby, the baby police see how well you raise the child. If they approve you can get a second one. And so on to the third,... etc.
  6:15pm listener David:

Pot should be legal
  6:15pm Danne D:

Frangry Videogame: Grand Theft Orbit
  6:17pm Caryn:

Police do have to go through a psych test, but then again, they also vet away candidates with high IQs. Maybe we should stop the IQ vetting to have better cops.
  6:17pm Colonel Kurtz:

I'd like to see FRANGRY fill in for JUDGE JUDY when the Judge goes on vacation...
  6:17pm Pete from Boston (and NJ):

You mean to tell me this isn't already an Andy Breckman sitcom?
  6:18pm robyn:

@listener mark Run for office. I'll vote for you.
  6:18pm Colonel Kurtz:

Because the cop job is rather routine and boring most of the time...
  6:19pm dean:

A butt-spanking for frangry, that's obligitory law!
  6:20pm Caryn:

There was an exposé about the IQ vetting on "60 Minutes" a few years back. Can't remember the reason the cops gave for the vetting, but it was a disturbing reveal.
  6:20pm Colonel Kurtz:

FRANGRY would make a good police officer.

She could be one of those decoy hookers...
  6:21pm Danne D:

you can buy fireworks in Pennsyltucky
  6:21pm miss cheri:

hiya caryn,,good to see you again,,
  6:22pm Danne D:

Why do you think they call detectives GumShoes?
  6:22pm Jordan:

Frangry, Get a popcicle for your throat.
  6:23pm Colonel Kurtz:

People who chew gum should be caned on the buttocks, like in Singapore.
  6:23pm listener David:

  6:23pm Danne D:

Andy just spray your feet with Tinactin already, man.
  6:24pm Colonel Kurtz:

Could SPIKE be outlawed?
  6:24pm Danne D:

Gout (with awesome picture): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gout
  6:24pm g:

@ Andy: could be toephilis.
  6:25pm Carmichael:

I'm late and I'm glad.
  6:25pm listener mark:

A list of causes for itchy toes;

•Foot rash
•Athlete's foot
•Dry skin
•Contact dermatitis
•Insect bite
•Tick bite
•Flea bites
  6:26pm FrankenNewYork:

I'm from Staten Island and have said for years that people should have to test to get off the Island and into the rest of the world. A fence would be involved.
  6:26pm Colonel Kurtz:

In a war there are many moments for compassion and tender action. There are many moments for ruthless action - what is often called ruthless - what may in many circumstances be only clarity, seeing clearly what there is to be done and doing it, directly, quickly, awake, looking at it.
  6:26pm Carmichael:

I would outlaw all foreigners living abroad.
  6:27pm listener David:

http://www.podologues.be/pdf/Morton.pdf Andy, check this out about your toes
  6:27pm Tack. E Jar:

I would like to make Mayonnaise against all laws.
  6:27pm Carmichael:

They don't sell roosters at the supermarket. That's all I know.
  6:28pm Colonel Kurtz:

We fight for the land that’s under our feet, gold that’s in our hands, women that worship the power in our loins. I summon fire from the sky. Do you know what it means to be a white man who can summon fire from the sky? What it means? You can live or die for these things. Not silly ideals that are always betrayed … What do you fight for, Captain?” And Capt. Willard , the “hero” of the story, responds, “Because it feels good.
  6:28pm Colonel Kurtz:

"Chickens and hens are different aren't they?"

  6:28pm Jordan:

Frangry, Ask Andy if you can go home early due to illness.
  6:28pm dean:

I think frangry as a decoy hooker-cop is hilarious!
  6:29pm Spike:

Republicans should be against the law.
  6:29pm Danne D:

What's up with Andy? He's like turning the conversation to his fetishes about once every 4 minutes lately.
  6:29pm robyn:

i know someone on facebook who is really into natural birth, etc., and posts pictures of placenta. that should be illegal.
  6:29pm Sean:

Andy, maybe you're allergic to some sort of fungus growing in your shoes. Do they burn when you aren't wearing any? If so, my second guess is that your feet are actually on fire.
  6:30pm mike fun:

Actually, they DO sell (neutered) roosters at the supermarket, and they're called capons.
  6:30pm Caryn:

Could we set a law that more than just 1 animal species should smell like buttered popcorn? The binturong is not enough!
  6:30pm robyn:

facebook is clearly in the need of some serious totalitarian rule.
  6:31pm Danne D:

PeeCock = Frangry's favorite animal?
  6:31pm Jordan:

Frangry as the girl member of the new Mod Squad.
  6:31pm g:

Toddlers and Tiaras should be illegal.
  6:31pm Danne D:

@robyn I thought it already had that?

Um, Andy, Frangry's already past 32...
  6:32pm listener mark:

If it's good enough for Snooki,....
  6:32pm Colonel Kurtz:

I think sex with your dead wife should be legal, for up to 6 hours after death, of course.

After 6 hours is just GROSS!!!
  6:32pm Danne D:

Andy, Frangry has been making bitches pay since '79. It's on her business cards even..
  6:32pm miss cheri:

so danne & caryn,, got any special plans this weekend??
  6:33pm Danne D:

  6:33pm Colonel Kurtz:

If FRANGRY was a hooker-decoy cop, what would she wear???
  6:33pm Danne D:

You should call in cheri, I'm sure you have some good ideas for laws.
  6:33pm Caryn:

  6:33pm Pete from Boston (and NJ):

If you don't have sex, God just makes the baby happen, and then you have no choice what you get. So tread carefully.
  6:34pm G:

Do religious law modifications count? My gf wants spicy pork sausage declared kosher. G-d just couldn't hate something that tasty.
  6:34pm robyn:

@Danne D i'm not sure how that system works. i think you have to report them. i don't think facebook has a "placenta filter" per se.
  6:34pm Colonel Kurtz:

Guinea fowl.

  6:34pm Sean:

They should make it illegal for fake meat products to look like meat. First off, its deceptive. Second, why would a vegetarian/vegan want to eat something in the shape of meat? Most meats aren't too aesthetically pleasing.
  6:34pm Pete from Boston (and NJ):

Guinea fowl, I thought, were the wild ancestors of domestic chickens.
  6:35pm Jordan:

Why can't she just be a real hooker with all those issues!
  6:35pm clint:

can frangry do the chicken dance?
  6:37pm g:

I want a law limiting who can wear words like "Juicy" and "Pink" across their ass.
  6:37pm Danne D:

@Sean I think all food's healthiness should be directly related to how yummy it is.
  6:37pm Eric:

the subway stations get hot because of the exhaust from the a/c on the subway cars
  6:38pm Colonel Kurtz:

Could Johnny Muller do a drawing of FRANGRY as a hooker-decoy cop?
  6:38pm Danne D:

@g - yeah and 50 year old dudes should not be allowed to wear shirts that say like Aeropostale and stuff.
  6:38pm Spike:

Cannibalism should be the law of the land.
  6:38pm dean:

Frangy would be a harsh gal on her rag
  6:39pm Caryn:

Oh, I'm with you on the food, Danne! If you sponsor that bill, I'll co-sponsor it.
  6:39pm robyn:

frangry the meat-eating, menstruating, hooker cop.
  6:39pm Danne D:

@Colonel Kurtz - The Frangry Comic Series - that would be awesome :)
  6:39pm Colonel Kurtz:

Veggie Burgers should be ILLEGAL!!!
  6:39pm Jordan:

2 Drawings - decoy hooker Frangry and real hooker Frangry.
  6:39pm g:

I would limit the amount of times someone can say "like" or "awesome" in a sentence.
  6:39pm tullius`:

You know Frangry, if you'd eat meat more often, you wouldn't GET your period...
  6:40pm listener mark:

There's a Trader Joes in the East Village?
  6:40pm Caryn:

Can there be a law that anyone who bumps into Nic Cage can legally slap him and yell "Snap out of it!"?
  6:41pm other david:

Kurtz: YOU should be ILLEGAL!!
Linda McCartney veggie burgers are the best.
  6:41pm Colonel Kurtz:

How much $$$ would FRANGRY charge as a hooker-cop?
  6:42pm robyn:

frangry suspiciously nibbling on carrots during her psychiatric test...
  6:42pm Colonel Kurtz:

Veggie Burgers are processed food garbage.
  6:42pm Danne D:

Um, other david, if they make veggie burgers out of Linda McCartney, they actually have meat in 'em. She's probably a little stringy, but it's still meat.
  6:43pm g:

Why are happy endings illegal? A massage is a massage is a massage. It is meant to release built up fluids, a condition which leads to violence and wars.
  6:43pm Eric:

cows like to take horse tranquilizers
  6:44pm listener mark:

  6:44pm miss cheri:

danne,,caryn & all,,i'm off to the movvies now,, yall have a great weekend!!!
  6:44pm robyn:

bet you miss I'm Worth It now...it should've been illegal to take that show off the air.
  6:44pm tullius:

I would make a law that Frangry has to marry me. I would take care of her when she's sick, show her how to shoot guns, make babies, and take her to Ohio to teach her about chickens...
  6:45pm Jordan:

Frangry, Are you sick from no sex?
  6:45pm Danne D:

bye cheri you should call next week
  6:45pm miss cheri:

  6:45pm Caryn:

@Danne: maybe the burgers are like communion wafers. They're vegetables, but through transsubstantiation, become the body of Linda McCartney?
  6:45pm dean:

It is a smelly show, but not a bad one!
  6:45pm Colonel Kurtz:

If FRANGRY was a decoy-hooker cop, would ANDY be her decoy-pimp cop???
  6:45pm g:

And excessive estrogen leads to burning toes.
  6:46pm Danne D:

This week's comments board topic: Dudes make awkward passes at Frangry.

(Of course that's the topic each week)
  6:46pm G:

@tullius: The only midwest Frangry is going to is the middle of the west village.
  6:46pm other david:

Just when you think it cant get any worse, you remember it's Shut Up, Weirdo - and it *always* gets worse.

  6:46pm listener mark:

Hi Ken !
  6:46pm Danne D:

@Caryn lol
  6:46pm Jordan:

You can get meth from Claritin-D as well.
  6:46pm Caryn:

The minute drugs are discussed, Ken calls in as an expert... On his way home from the head shop.
  6:46pm miss cheri:

maybe i will danne,,
  6:47pm Danne D:

Whenever I see Tullius on the comments board on think of those Tullis and Clark commercials that Irwin is always playin'
  6:47pm G:

Ken is the one who decides how to modify all FMU laws.
  6:47pm Colonel Kurtz:

That's not where the term "scapegoat" comes from, FRANGRY.
  6:47pm miss cheri:

night all
  6:48pm Colonel Kurtz:

I'd like to see KEN on the FACES OF METH.
  6:49pm Danne D:

  6:49pm Skirkie:

Wait, do WFMU DJs get attacked by wolves very often?
  6:49pm Danne D:

In ancient Greece a cripple or beggar or criminal (the pharmakos) was cast out of the community, either in response to a natural disaster (such as a plague, famine or an invasion) or in response to a calendrical crisis (such as the end of the year). In the Bible, the scapegoat was a goat that was designated (Hebrew לַעֲזָאזֵֽל ) la-aza'zeyl to be outcast in the desert as part of the ceremonies of the Day of Atonement, that began during the Exodus with the original Tabernacle and continued through the times of the temples in Jerusalem.
  6:49pm listener mark:

Crocs are why Andy's toes are burning.
  6:49pm G:

@CK: Might those symptoms of Lyme disease actually be symptoms of meth abuse?
  6:50pm Danne D:

@Andy I don't think that Crocs can conduct electricity very well
  6:50pm Colonel Kurtz:

What if you're a decoy-hooker cop? Can you wear Crocks then?
  6:50pm G:

Crocs are really happening. If you live in 2005.
  6:51pm disastrogirl:

Can we prohibit UGG boots? Nobody has a good excuse to wear those.
  6:51pm Danne D:

She'd wear decoy-hooker-crocs
  6:51pm tullius:

Was the most perfect sound effect to accompany the mention of Crocs..
  6:51pm Caryn:

Ken wants it to be legal to get goats hooked on meth to try and create more fainting goats.

@Andy: ironically, fainting goats are nowadays more valuable than ordinary goats, so their historical beast-food origins have probably been replaced with "if a wolf attacks my fainting goats, throw a regular goat at it as a distraction".
  6:52pm Jordan:

Frangry, I don't think you written down a possible winning caller yet!
  6:52pm robyn:

...is andy for real right now
  6:52pm G:

All callers are losers. Every week.
  6:52pm Colonel Kurtz:

Wow, now FRANGRY'S an expert on milking cows...
  6:53pm miss cheri:

danne,,caryn,, i hope i'll see you very soon..
  6:53pm stinkbug:

I want to hear Frangry's illegal immigration policy.
  6:54pm Danne D:

Now calling - a 14-year-old meth expert
  6:54pm Danne D:

Mmmmmmmmmm Meth Pus Stew
  6:55pm listener mark:

I love this show. It's like when JFK hijacked the space shuttle and bombed Pearl Harbor.
  6:55pm g:

Poppa Boyle from French Connection?
  6:55pm Colonel Kurtz:

Hey ANDY, meth might bring down your cholesterol levels.

It's worth a shot.
  6:55pm robyn:

it's like florida meth jenna
  6:56pm Colonel Kurtz:

Methazuma's Revenge...
  6:56pm G:

Andy's in comedy meltdown :-)
  6:57pm Danne D:

Andy couldn't wait until AFTER the show to inhale the laughing gas this week I see...
  6:57pm Caryn:

Florida meth Jenna: vegetarian hooker-cop, who goes undercover at the DMV
  6:57pm Danne D:

Yay Robyn :) Rare Comments Board Victory!!!
  6:57pm Colonel Kurtz:

I would repeal Murphy's Law.
  6:58pm robyn:

you don't KNOW that i'm not florida meth jenna...
  6:58pm G:

Mr Jerk on the line.
  6:58pm Danne D:

Whoa, this guy is listening to this show for factual content?
  6:58pm g:

We don't need no stinking facts!!!!
  6:58pm Colonel Kurtz:

The PROZAC is in the sewer water, STUPID!!!!
  6:58pm Danne D:

Frangry should give this guy a prize for most boring caller!
  6:59pm G:

Tell him to hang up and go back to drinking his filtered pee.
Avatar 6:59pm FRANGRY:

  6:59pm Danne D:

This guys is out-Andying Andy
  6:59pm g:

This guy needs Prozac!
  6:59pm disastrogirl:

The Prozac in the drinking water is true. The filters don't remove trace drugs.
  6:59pm disastrogirl:

The Prozac in the drinking water is true. The filters don't remove trace drugs.
  6:59pm Colonel Kurtz:

This caller is a bigger douche-bag than Andy!
  6:59pm Danne D:

Have a good night weirdos :)
bye Andy :)
Bye Frangry :) <333
  7:00pm robyn:

thanks Danne D! yay comments board!!
  7:00pm Caryn:

That last caller: NY prozac Frangry
  7:00pm Jordan:

Frangry, Try some meth this w/e.
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