Options Dinner at Andy’s with Ken and Andy: Playlist from April 25, 2012 Options

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The program formerly known as The Fuzzy Glove Hour, Whores, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options April 25, 2012: All-State Call-In

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Listener comments!

  6:01pm Premise Police:

premise failure watch, commencing now
  6:02pm Danne D:

Fatal Flaw - do they have 50 listeners?
  6:03pm Matt from Springfield:

Andy was a disturbed child and lives that out through his sex symbols.
  6:03pm Danne D:

First!
  6:04pm Matt from Springfield:

Hey Danne!
NJ cancelled out early, now Ken and Andy are screwed!
  6:04pm Danne D:

Comments Board play-along scoreboard for calls:
NJ-CA
  6:05pm Danne D:

@Matt - you can do about 12 states since you are from Springfield
  6:05pm Caryn:

Andy just likes curvier women.

Do they have a map or list, where they mark which states have been covered already to keep track of things?
  6:05pm John McCabe in L.A.:

crap I wanted to be CA :(
  6:05pm Matt from Springfield:

Hope they don't have Caller ID...
  6:06pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA
  6:06pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Good luck on Hawaii.
  6:07pm Lizardner Dave:

In honor of last week's show: Fuck this, I'm outta here!
  6:07pm Matt from Springfield:

Wow, I would think Arizona and Nevada would not have a state fish, considering how little of the state has rivers...

Mike Noble! I could've stepped in if no one had called from VA, but there goes mike!
  6:08pm Matt from Springfield:

And he was correct on the state bird and state tree.
  6:08pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

I wonder if it would be fair to call out to those states that don't call in?
  6:08pm listener David:

Mazel Tov, Andy!
  6:08pm kat330:

Grandy Andy!
  6:08pm Matt from Springfield:

I would still have a DNA test done, to make sure Rachel is really the baby's mother.
  6:08pm Danne D:

Andy should take a grand-paternity test

NJ-CA-VA-TX
  6:09pm Listener John from NJ who lives in NJ:

Does it count if I am in the State of Depression?
  6:09pm Matt from Springfield:

ARIZONA! Death by gunfire #1 is probably there now.
  6:09pm kat330:

From the list Ken read aloud, apparently someone else from Indiana listens and responded before.
  6:09pm Danne D:

Tommelise should call in from Puerto Rico :)
  6:10pm Caryn:

@Matt: I'm shocked too, but maybe they also just like their irony in those states?
  6:10pm Matt from Springfield:

Lou D'Antonio was probably the first DJ granddad...
  6:10pm Matt from Springfield:

@Caryn: They are LEAD-ing in IRON-y.
  6:11pm Lizardner Dave:

The key question for Andy's grandkid is of course, vaginal or Caesarean?

Ok, now I'm really out. See you on the archives.
  6:11pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN
  6:12pm Matt from Springfield:

Pennsylvania! Take it, Danne!
  6:13pm Matt from Springfield:

On second thought, disqualified! Not yet!
  6:13pm Matt from Springfield:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trilobite
  6:14pm Caryn:

@Matt: Oh, Matt, you punning machine you!
  6:14pm Matt from Springfield:

Indiana! Take it, Danne!
  6:14pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN
  6:15pm kat330:

Ha! Was just getting ready to dial in, too. Oh well, Indiana's represented IAE.
  6:15pm Carmichael:

Indiana? They are "Hosers".
  6:16pm Matt from Springfield:

Go Punsters!
  6:16pm Matt from Springfield:

Indiana Father. Hoosier Daddy.
  6:16pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY
  6:16pm kat330:

Philo, go drive across the river and call in as Kentucky. :)
  6:16pm Carmichael:

What is the state soda of Wyoming?
  6:17pm Matt from Springfield:

Wyoming - that's a toughie, a good one to get out of the way.
  6:17pm Danne D:

Andy Beat out a caller on facts!
  6:17pm Caryn:

@Carm: According to the McKenzie brothers, all people are hosers...
  6:17pm Matt from Springfield:

It should be the right to vote. I thought the first female governor was Texas.
(Of course Danne, Andy's only wrong if the caller is right! :)
  6:18pm Carmichael:

@Caryn: Take off, eh!
  6:18pm kat330:

"Let Laramie take care o' me till they bury me."
  6:18pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL
  6:18pm Carmichael:

The Old Codger has to be the 1st WFMU grandfather.
  6:19pm Matt from Springfield:

Aw, look at this hoser, got me a pack o' smokes for Christmas, eh!
  6:19pm Danne D:

20 minutes in - on pace for 24 states
  6:21pm Carmichael:

Ken should play Flight of the Bumblebee in the background to get listeners excited enough to call.
  6:22pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR
  6:23pm Carmichael:

Oregon's state motto is We're not from California.
  6:24pm Matt from Springfield:

Ore-goni crafts.
  6:24pm kat330:

Beautiful Oregon pic here: http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/image/1204/lyridcrater_goldpaint_annotated_960.jpg
  6:25pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE
  6:25pm kat330:

BTW, Indiana does NOT have a state fish [pending legislation currently].
  6:26pm Philo Gristle:

Something fishy about that.
  6:26pm Carmichael:

The people in Idaho can't get cell reception in their concrete bunkers.
  6:27pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY
  6:28pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO
  6:29pm kat330:

Hey, Danne, we were hoping you'd participate in the Strand treasure hunt. What happened?
  6:29pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT
  6:29pm Carmichael:

ndbob should be on the phone, dammit.
  6:29pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Was there a WA?
  6:30pm Danne D:

:( when was it kat?
Had an e-date scheduled for last sunday but weather canceled it.
  6:30pm Carmichael:

No Dave, go!
  6:31pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA
  6:31pm kat330:

Um, I guess it was two Wed.'s ago? You didn't hear the 7SD archive? It was a $40 prize -- accounting for inflation. :)
  6:31pm Danne D:

14 states - 32 minutes in
  6:32pm kat330:

rought-ro...
  6:33pm Matt from Springfield:

Wow, the show's gotten lively all of a sudden!
  6:33pm Premise Police:

They spend several minutes on each call, and then more time summarizing and kibbitzing between calls. To get to 50 in 60, you need nearly one state a minute without slacking off.
  6:33pm you numbskulls:

you crazy guys I just called from Denver, Pennsylvania and you said you already had Colorado, DUH!
  6:33pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Someone doesn't understand jokes.
  6:34pm Premise Police:

Wow, living with that would be hell on earth :-)
  6:34pm kat330:

Ken's lying. He's snarkier than Andy by far.
  6:34pm pfafulous:

Yhis just got incredible. I'm glad I decided to listen live today.
  6:34pm Carmichael:

Please shut her up ....
  6:35pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT
  6:35pm kat330:

Your radio career's just fine Andy. Look to your marriage though.
  6:36pm Matt from Springfield:

Wasn't Ken's basement flooded during Irene?
  6:36pm Premise Police:

That's a marriage? That's an ad for the merry single life :-)
  6:36pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD

lol what effigies is Maryland known for?
  6:36pm Matt from Springfield:

Assoteague wild ponies! Huzzah!
  6:37pm kat330:

Where are the parents of these wild ponies? They spring from nothingness into wild ponyhood?
  6:38pm Caryn:

"Wild little ponies, wild little ponies..."
  6:38pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA

just 38 minutes in, we've passed the 1/3 mark.
  6:38pm Misty of Chincoteague:

We have nothing to do on these barrier island nature reserves than fuck our goddam manes off.
  6:38pm Matt from Springfield:

But for Andy Breckman, isn't an offensive accusation of bizarre sexual/marriage practices on your part a typical dinner party conversation starter?
  6:38pm giraffe-o:

I am currently in the state of Canada... it's America's hat!!
  6:38pm Danne D:

Hint - the Green River is in Washington
  6:39pm Misty of Chincoteague:

America's asshat, ya hoser :-)
  6:40pm Caryn:

All the serial killers are "Twin Peaks" fans and migrate to the Northwest because of that?
  6:40pm kat330:

I clearly remember the show from 8 years ago. You, too, Danne?
  6:41pm Jack from WY:

8 years ago they asked for the shape of states. they should do that again
  6:41pm Danne D:

LOL - I can't remember 8 years back, Kat ;)

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL
  6:41pm Matt from Springfield:

If mike noble in dc had called as from DC, I could have contributed VA.
  6:42pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI
  6:42pm giraffe-o:

They don't have phones or the internets in Louisiana, don't expect a call from them.
  6:42pm kat330:

Black squirrels = Ohio.
  6:42pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV that's 20
  6:43pm Matt from Springfield:

The Vegas Strip is the Boulevard of Broken Dreams.
  6:43pm giraffe-o:

Andy can pronounce 'croupier' but not 'Nevada' or 'Oregon'
  6:43pm Caryn:

I thought the answer would've been "hookers".
  6:44pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE
  6:44pm Philo Gristle:

Two-tone, color changing chameleon squirrels = Finland
  6:44pm Caryn:

@giraffe-o: because he gambles, but doesn't travel
  6:45pm Caryn:

Damn straight, PG!
  6:46pm adam in grand rapids:

we got red , black , and grey squirrels here in michigan .. but around grand rapids only red
  6:46pm Matt from Springfield:

Well Beth did TELL the other woman to call - Beth led her into the lion's den.
  6:46pm kat330:

Not the getaway car. She bought the ticket, though.
  6:47pm Matt from Springfield:

There you go, kat.
  6:48pm Caryn:

What Beth did was entrapment, not driving a getaway car.
  6:49pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA

Ken should've set the goal as an electoral-vote majority.

This would've succeeded if the secret families has in these other states would have called in.
  6:49pm kat330:

I agree. I like Lucy and not Lucille so much. Usually it's the other way around with names, like Kathleen not Kathy.
  6:50pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI

(I meant Andy's other families of course)
  6:50pm Caryn:

Maybe Ken was expecting a Lucille Ball homage?
  6:50pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Congrats on HI!
  6:50pm anne:

mahalo is thank you!
  6:51pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO
  6:51pm Aloha:

the state fish in HI is....is.....????...

Humuhumunukunukuapuaa
  6:51pm anne:

HI state bird the nene
  6:52pm Caryn:

I could say the state bird and motto of Hawaii, but that doesn't mean I live there. It just means I'm a NewsRadio fan.
  6:53pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO-NM Half-way!
  6:54pm kat330:

C'mon KY listeners!! I know you're there because you've mentioned it on comments in the past! Put the Derby aside for a minute and dial like the wind!
  6:54pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO-NM-MA
  6:55pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO-NM-MA-PA
  6:55pm HotRod:

Thank you for making me laugh today. Great show. :)
  6:56pm kat330:

Hell, if I called in for every state I've lived, it would be like the tailor with several in one blow.
  6:56pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO-NM-MA-PA-DC-OH-WI
  6:57pm Matt from Springfield:

@kat: The 1937 (?) Mickey Mouse cartoon "The Brave Little Tailor".
You can't fool me!! :)
  6:57pm Caryn:

@kat: call in for one that hasn't been listed yet!
  6:58pm kat330:

That's the DISNEY version, but first it was in a "50 Famous Fairytales" book I had as a kid. :)
  6:59pm Danne D:

NJ-CA-VA-TX-MN-IN-WY-IL-OR-NE-NY-CO-UT-GA-CT-MD-WA-FL-MI-NV-DE-LA-HI-MO-NM-MA-PA-DC-OH-WI-NC
At least you guys got an electoral vote majority! :)
GA already done.
  6:59pm Danne D:

Have a good night all :)
30 states plus DC
Not too shabby
  6:59pm kat330:

And Dracula said "You can't fool me! yadayada And my horses are swift!"
  7:00pm Matt from Springfield:

@kat: That goes back far!

Thanks for a wild and crazy show! Thanks Danne for scorekeeping! Have a good night everyone!
  7:00pm kat330:

I KNOW too much and my wild ponies are swift!
  7:00pm Caryn:

Well, at least we heard from Andy's huge female entourage... Seriously, does he know any men aside from Ken, Irwin, Regis and Shalhoub?
  7:00pm Philo Gristle:

'night! Good show!
  7:01pm kat330:

Bye!
  7:02pm Misty of Chincoteague:

Dude's a babe magnet, clearly.
  8:04pm kat330:

Holy crap! Not that anyone interested (or otherwise) will see this, but I just went back to the 2004 show on this topic and I WAS the Indiana caller back then! Around the 25:00 minute mark. No wonder I remembered it (sort of) clearly, Danne/Matt/etc. :)
  2:12am Listener zero:

Mazel tov, Rachel & Andy & Beth & Lucy!
  10:59pm leber_s:

hey ken and andy, i got news for you. you and your kids are just a bunch of sluts and whores.
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