Options Seven Second Delay with Andy and Ken: Playlist from April 11, 2012 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options April 11, 2012: Treasure Hunt

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Artist Approx. start time
Ken & Andy  0:00:00 ()

Listener comments!

  Wed. 4/11/12 6:01pm Matt from Springfield:

Treasure Hunt--how silly, everyone knows the WFMU Music Library IS the treasure! We know where that is!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:01pm kat330:

This theme version is my fave, FWIW.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:02pm Burl:

@kat:

I want to sail away to a distant shore, and make like an Ap Man
I'm an Ap Man, I'm an Ap Ap Man
I'm an Ap Man, I'm an iPhone man, I'm Ap Man
I am an Ap Man
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:02pm kat330:

Burl Ives jokes!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:02pm Ike:

That's more of a meta-rape joke.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:03pm Philo Gristle:

Is Danne D on the hunt?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:03pm Matt from Springfield:

YES! Irwin the perfect Andy fill-in! Gum chewing, rudeness and rape jokes!!!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:03pm kat330:

Burl started without them. I doff my beret to you, Mr. Ives.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:04pm Jewish Radio:

We have an Afikomen, but no Host
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:04pm Matt from Springfield:

I was just about to say...Danne won his $25 in a similar hunt years ago.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:04pm xox:

is there a new number ?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:05pm Caryn:

Ooh, is he gonna talk about how Disneyworld essentially becomes a gay leather S&M club after the gates close?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:05pm kat330:

A hard bat is good to find, speaking of treasure hunts.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:05pm Philo Gristle:

Saint Ives. As written by Ross Thomas. And performed by burly Chuck Bronson.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:05pm Matt from Springfield:

The bats are less than "melee" grade.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:06pm Jewish Radio:

Dock Andy? Is that a briss joke?

You guys need hookers?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:06pm Philo Gristle:

Get Booker T.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:06pm mike noble in nyc:

what am i, dead meat?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:06pm cglenn:

i dig those bats you gave out. it reminds me of when i was a kid. they had those balls with holes vented in them. Many hours of fun playing wiffle ball in Tulsa, Ok....
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:06pm glenn:

I LOVE ROSS THOMAS!!! that's all.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:07pm Philo Gristle:

The Fools in This Town, Glenn.....
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:07pm Matt from Springfield:

To absolutely no one's surprise...
SEVEN MINUTE DELAY!! (false enthusiasm)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:07pm Caryn:

I think Andy faked the panting to make Ken think he hurried. But alas, he was foiled by the security cameras...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:08pm Jewish Radio:

Andy's faking breathlessness to gin up sympathy, hopefully displacing possible recriminations over his tardiness.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:08pm kat330:

@Caryn: BTW, hope your Internet issues are over?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:09pm Matt from Springfield:

It won't disappoint you terribly, I mean it's not like it's a Breckman family Hannukah present!! :P
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:09pm Caryn:

Is the lucre filthy? (That's my yes/no question.)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:09pm glenn:

chinaman's chance, mordida man, the eighth dwarf, everything he ewrtote was great. i love 'em all.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:10pm kat330:

Guess Danne's not here because he IS out looking for the treasure already. He's one D.etermined dude.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:10pm Caryn:

@kat: they seem to have passed for now.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:10pm glenn:

ewrtote? type much?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:11pm Matt from Springfield:

@JR: But Andy could face severe recriminations for showing up late, couldn't he? After all, he comes only because he was sentenced for some crime I assume, it would violate the terms of his sentence by arriving late?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:11pm DanofOrange:

Kristen and Kurt = awesome
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:12pm kat330:

@glenn: Remember our little secret about maple syrup? (which I believe is why you have to counterbalance such sweetness by being acerbic)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:12pm Caryn:

Wait, I've missed the Schaal episode? Dammit! Need to go archive-trawling...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:12pm G:

Andy's ankle bracelet has already reported his lateness to his Parole Officer
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:13pm Caryn:

I'll just whistle innocently and pretend I don't know the maple syrup secret...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:13pm kat330:

Well, here's a secret I'll share with you [everyone else look away, honor system!] Philo G. is JT. :) Nice you have the Ross Thomas in common.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:13pm G:

The callers are short bus refugees. What else is new.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:14pm Philo Gristle:

So I can't be obnoxious now? Drat.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:15pm kat330:

@the UCB Theater?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:15pm Kim:

Dear Andy is it? Chewing gum on the air. That's just gross.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:15pm kat330:

@Caryn: Well, then GOOD! (about passing Inet problems)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:15pm glenn:

i would suggest that maple syrup lovers go out and stock up. this year's crappy winter will make the delicious elixir scarce and costly.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:16pm forked tongue:

The most dispiriting words heard on 7SD: "Hi Ken, Hi Andy, it's Hunter."
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:16pm Caryn:

Oh, sure you can, J... I mean, Philo! After all, nobody read kat's comment. We all looked away as she requested.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:16pm G:

Andy's made an entire decades-long radio career out of relentlessly and mercilessly smacking gum.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:16pm Close Listener:

An efficient strategy here would be to continually subdivide Manhattan by North-South and East-West lines, starting with, for instance, "Is it below 42nd St?" and "Is it east of 5th Avenue?", etc.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:16pm Moses:

is it kosher for passover?!?!?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:17pm Philo Gristle:

Used to tap birch trees for the sap as kids. Tasty.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:17pm Caryn:

Is the envelope on a street or an avenue?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:17pm Matt from Springfield:

That's how you do it, Close Listener!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:18pm glenn:

fuck kosher. maple syrup beats kosher like a baby seal.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:18pm kat330:

@Caryn: He said he was getting no responses using :JT:: (I suggested the colons put people off), so Buttons Gwinnett inspired him to the PG.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:18pm Caryn:

Also: is it indoors or outdoors? Seriously, people, narrow things down strategically!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:19pm kat330:

Glenn, glenn PLEASE have some supper -- or tea if that's your timeline! :)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:19pm Philo Gristle:

I've been de-colonized.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:20pm Matt from Springfield:

Narrowed a bit too quickly--maybe is it in A park?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:20pm Caryn:

@kat: but now he's totally PG. Come on, go for at least R rated!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:21pm Matt from Springfield:

Is it in a place of business?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:22pm Philo Gristle 13:

This is going to be bad luck.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:23pm Caryn:

@Philo: go for NC-17!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:23pm kat330:

@Caryn: JT doesn't do blue well. Afraid I'm the x-rated in this household.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:23pm Close Listener:

Folks, the next question should be "Is it south of Canal Street?" or "Is it east of Broadway?" And so on...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:23pm Matt from Springfield:

It's in a locker at a train station!!
Andy B, "Rat Race" ref :)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:24pm forked tongue:

No wait, actually the most dispiriting words heard on 7SD are "next week we're back at the UCB Theatre."
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm Matt from Springfield:

@FT: Or rather, "next week we're back"! ;)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm Hunter:

Forked Tongue, fuck off.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm miss cheri:

hey there caryn--good evening!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm G:

Close Listener doesn't realize most people are simply neither logical nor systematic. Election results should tip you off about that, CL.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm Philo Blue Gristle:

I'm wearing my gutter helmet for Andy.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:25pm G:

ut oh
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:26pm Close Listener:

Binary search, you dopes! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binary_search
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:27pm G:

a hostile Hunter with a miss cheri chaser. Buckle your seat belts, it could be a bumpy ride.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:27pm mike noble in nyc:

are men allowed to apply for the job?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:27pm Caryn:

Next week: cat night! The week after that: matt night. Then: fat night. Then: rat night. Then: gat night. Then: vat night. Then: pat night. Then: DAT night. Then: SAT night.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:27pm kat330:

@glenn: Arrrrggghh, you have my FULL permission to continue being peckish.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:28pm G:

sure, mike -- lop it off and apply
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:28pm Close Listener:

Alas, G, so true...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:28pm Philo Gristle:

There's a target for a good hunter.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:28pm Matt from Springfield:

@Caryn: Better clear my schedule two weeks from now...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:29pm Hunter:

I am only hostile to people who deserve it. Period.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:29pm G:

@CL: Just keepin it real, dawg. Sad but true.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:29pm mike noble in nyc:

but i'm already on show staff! do i get to keep my little bishop?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:29pm joey:

it's at the ANthology Film Archives
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:30pm Maximilian:

this is a great time on this showing
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:30pm kat330:

@mike: Your "little bishop"? Is that a euphemism?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:31pm Caryn:

I gotta say, I'm kinda curious about what the one Andy-penned line in "IQ" is...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:31pm G:

if you're obedient staff, it's already been removed. have you looked lately?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:31pm mike noble in nyc:

well, if you listen to shut up weirdo, you know they call me mike no-balls.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:32pm Maximilian:

what is it what will happen is it made of gold or platinum?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:32pm G:

you started that, mike. so maybe that clears up my question :-P
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:32pm glenn:

what hunter said.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:33pm Matt from Springfield:

It's in the East Village--any other narrowing questions??
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:33pm Caryn:

Having no balls might make your "little bishop" seem bigger. Optical illusion, you know, Mike.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:33pm ?:

What has it got in it's pockets'ess??
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:33pm kat330:

Staff? Little Bishop? Hard Bats? The blue stuff writes itself here.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:34pm G:

I have a closer question:

who cares?

O:-)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:34pm Close Listener:

Teamwork, folks! Work the grid!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:34pm kat330:

Asking if Starbucks probably wouldn't narrow it down all that much.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:35pm Hunter:

Kat, LOL :)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:35pm Caryn:

@kat: well, if the answer is "it's not in a Starbucks", that would definitely narrow it down.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:36pm glenn:

http://www.darrenbarefoot.com/archives/2006/10/kitty-corner-starbucks.html
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:38pm Matt from Springfield:

Anthology Film Archives is east of 2nd Ave, it's not that..
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:38pm Caryn:

Over here, "is it in a Starbucks" would definitely narrow it down. Since I think there are no Starbucks in the entire country. (One may have opened up a little while back, but reports are varied.)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:38pm kat330:

Books and books and books, galore!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:39pm Philo Gristle:

Is it in the mystery section? Near letter T?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:39pm Close Listener:

Is it in a book? In the fiction section? Does the author's last name start with a letter than comes before "M"?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:39pm Matt from Springfield:

Is it in a post office?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:39pm Mark:

If I had asked a question, I also would have asked whether it was at the Strand. Don't know why, but it was the first thing that came to mind in that area.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:40pm kat330:

In a "Monk" book?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:40pm Caryn:

Has Andy written any books?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:41pm Philo Gristle:

If a Monk book, I think Lee Goldberg wrote those..
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:41pm Matt from Springfield:

Is it the Bookstore Strand--I was wondering what they meant.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:41pm Close Listener:

Yes, Matt, it's the bookstore.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:42pm Caryn:

If it was non-fiction, I'd look for the Darrell Hammond autobiography (last week shout-out!), but as it is, go for the Monk books!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:42pm Close Listener:

Does the author's last name start with a letter that comes before "F"?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:43pm moose:

i'm trying to convince my friend to go over but she won't do it and she's not even that far
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:43pm kat330:

So Andy was late because he was stranded at the Strand?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:43pm glenn:

i can't think of any finnish mystery writers off the top of my head, but i do love jo nesbo (norwegian) and arnaldur indridason (icelandic}
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:43pm Caryn:

Do the store personnel know the money is there, and have they ensured an ordinary customer hasn't found it already? Because if someone has already bought the book, that would put a spanner in the works.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:44pm Caryn:

@glenn: most of the big Finnish mystery writers are after K in the alphabet...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:45pm kat330:

@Caryn: Hey, Caryn, is "Iron Sky" opening near you soon?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:45pm Philo Gristle:

none that have been translated... that I know of. Tapani Bagge wrote good books and I started translating one for our pub. co. but too much work...
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:46pm G:

The prize is a message on a slip in a 1986 diet book stating: "Drink More Ovaltine"
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:46pm Caryn:

Andy said it was before K, but then Ken and Andy said it was below K, and that to me means after K. So which one is it?

@kat: it opened last Friday (I don't know if it's in our town yet)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:46pm kat330:

@JT: There's Leena Krohn that we published.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:48pm Philo Gristle:

Carl Hiaasen! Good pick. Leena Krohn is great and mysterious, but not mystery.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:49pm kat330:

I'd like to see Kathy Katy show up as Drew's competition.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:49pm glenn:

has anybody been to bouchercon?
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:50pm Philo Gristle:

Not us, even though it was next door a few years back in Indiananpolis.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:51pm Caryn:

Ask a clerk, people!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:51pm G:

Apparently Thre Bible is filed under Fiction, then.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:51pm kat330:

Peckish Games!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:51pm Close Listener:

It's the very first book under "A"!!!!!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:51pm Caryn:

Maybe it means it's the first book on the shelf.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:52pm kat330:

@CL: I think you may be right.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:53pm mike noble in nyc:

clusterfuck!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:53pm Philo Gristle:

Too bad for Danne D.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:54pm glenn:

very last book.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:54pm kat330:

Maybe his name is Danne Drew.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:54pm Matt from Springfield:

Very first book under A!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:54pm kat330:

My money's with glenn.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:55pm miss cheri:

have a great night caryn, see you real soon!!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:55pm Caryn:

Forbidden Planet? Look for the last X-Men comic!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:56pm kat330:

Scene from Magic Christian.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:56pm Matt from Springfield:

Well partial success by the end of the episode!
And it was fun and somewhat interactive too!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:57pm Philo Gristle:

Watch out for the Krell.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:57pm Caryn:

It's easy to co-operate when the money is so easily divided into 2.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:57pm Philo Gristle:

Mad Dash!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:57pm kat330:

Awww....let down.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:57pm Matt from Springfield:

It's more than I expected (more than the $25 of the Western Union challenge)
But, certainly less than I hoped (when they said it would be more than I expected...!)
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:58pm Matt from Springfield:

Last YEAR??!
Not the Darrell Hammond one, good guess though Caryn.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:58pm kat330:

Good evening everyone! Very fun show, A & K!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:58pm listener mark:

Hey Andy.
Hey Ken.
Thanks for the wiffle ball bat, the cops at the PATH station had a good laugh as they frisked me.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:59pm moose:

yay!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:59pm Matt from Springfield:

Good night commenters! It was enjoyable tonight.
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:59pm aa:

the show worked!
  Wed. 4/11/12 6:59pm Philo Gristle:

g'night!
  Wed. 4/11/12 7:00pm Caryn:

This was fun!
  Wed. 4/11/12 9:22pm drewo:

Thanks Andy & Ken. The money (should the bank accept taped-together bills) will go towards my latest pledge.
  Fri. 4/13/12 4:51am lz:

Was that Nachum calling in around 29:29?
  Fri. 4/13/12 11:08pm Cheryl:

Hey Drew. That was fun. I'm glad you won. That's really decent of you to put the money toward a wfmu pledge.
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