Options Seven Second Delay with Ken and Andy: Playlist from September 28, 2011 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options September 28, 2011: Rosh Hoshana

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Ken & Andy 


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Listener comments!

  6:05pm Dan B From Upstate:

My favorite of the Andy Breckman Men right here...
  6:05pm Carmichael:

OK, let's just get this over with.
  6:05pm Matt from Springfield:

With all the zingers and swipes traded between Ken & Andy, this is more like ROAST Hoshana.
  6:05pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

I welcome a Jew-free second-half of the show.
  6:06pm Greg from Va:

Is it almost over yet?
  6:06pm PMD:

Poor Irwin
  6:06pm forked tongue:

Andy just mentioned the best of all possible reasons to play that version of the theme song.
  6:07pm glenn:

more like three fifths.
  6:07pm Greg from Va:

This show is like watching TV with the sound off.
  6:07pm Matt from Springfield:

@Dave: Secular and ethnic Jews as well? Or just the practicing Jews?

Maybe they should answer the phones as "Your mother's calling you" to make sure they won't STAY on the line if they call.
  6:08pm listener mark:

Jesus H. 'tap dancing inside a dumptruck' Christ, this show is dead on arrival.
  6:08pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

@Matt - I guess we will find out!
  6:09pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

I wonder if anything happened with their wallets this week.
  6:09pm Carmichael:

Lapsed Jews are OK, Matt.
  6:10pm Carmichael:

Charles Nelson Reilly and above.
  6:10pm kat330:

Elliott Gould, heh! Andy must be obsessed since he mentioned EG the one time I called into the show.
  6:11pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

Forget it, Andy!

You suck!
  6:11pm Matt from Springfield:

Why not the Somali pirates themselves? And their Federal Marshals! Hey, why not hold a piracy trial in 60 minutes at the UCB Theatre!!
  6:12pm Greg from Va:

Whatever happened to pirate radio?
  6:12pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Try to slip in an apology for the awful sound quality last week, the show sounded worse then normal and thats saying something
  6:13pm G:

Good show topic: Andy's job search since Monk, in full detail under the influence of sodium pentathol or similar.
  6:13pm listener mark:

Hold the photo up to the microphone, I can't see it.
  6:13pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

Was Elliot Gould at the Wall Street Protest?
  6:14pm G:

The protestors' boss is the NY State Dept of Employment. You're their generous boss.
  6:14pm Matt from Springfield:

Andy is WAY too self-satisfied with that so-called zinger! Or...he's brilliant at fake-laughing to the point of hacking :)
  6:14pm Carmichael:

I'd rather listen to Somali pirate radio.
  6:14pm kat330:

Two T's or not two T's -- aw, what the double L...
  6:14pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

Don't you mean "JANITORS"?
  6:15pm G:

Where's Dick Clark when you need him?
  6:16pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

Yeah, where does the matzo ball drop - Times Square?
  6:16pm Matt from Springfield:

Do you guys sell Book-of-Life Insurance?
  6:16pm G:

Is this show in the Book of Death? It's died so many times now.
  6:17pm Carmichael:

Not Times Square, you have to buy retail there. Probably the Garment District.
  6:17pm Elliott Gould's Cat:

meow
  6:17pm kat330:

@dog walker: Does your boss sign your paycheck with one T? He's a fraud.
  6:18pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

Andy, if you beg, I'll let you pick up Elliot Gould's Dog's caca - without the plastic bag!
  6:18pm Matt from Springfield:

17 minutes---Andy has found the will to write his name in the Book of Death...or something in as many words...
  6:18pm G:

Wakeboarding= Book of Death
  6:18pm Greg from Va:

Is "Seven Second Delay in the "Book of Life"?
  6:19pm PMD:

blow a chaffeur?
  6:19pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Blow the chauffeur?
  6:19pm Hetero Dude:

*You* blow the chauffeur!!!
  6:19pm Elliot Gould's Dog Walker:

I thought Ken said "blow a Chauffeur"!
  6:20pm G:

Ask the Magic Jewish Eight Ball
  6:21pm Listener Julian:

This is appointment radio!
  6:21pm Matt from Springfield:

@Julian: Agree! This is the highlight of the show!
  6:22pm listener mark:

dead air in the hudson valley
  6:22pm Listener Julian:

Wait, no... THIS is the highlight of the show.
  6:22pm Matt from Springfield:

...possibly for this entire Jewish Year, and the next!
  6:22pm Lizardner Dave:

Is this show in the book of life?
  6:22pm G:

Maybe she's just in the book of divorce, like so many others...
  6:22pm Carmichael:

Someone help me. Please kill my radio. Attack the transmitter. Anything.
  6:23pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Hey Guys - stop joking about DEATH.

I am not amused!
  6:23pm listener mark:

weather report
  6:23pm FCC:

Someone investigate what these people are talking about "blowing"...
  6:23pm G:

@Carmichael: Just let it roll over you, it strengthens you.
  6:23pm Greg from Va:

There is no reason for this, if this is actually where it's at.
  6:24pm self-eating noodle kugel:

i think this book of life is just for boys
  6:24pm G:

Beth is PISSED.
  6:25pm kat330:

@self-eating -- isn't everything?
  6:25pm Listener Julian:

I'm loving Whoopie-Cushion Hava Nagila. New 7SD bed music!
  6:25pm Peter Griffin:

@SENK: Duh. Women aren't people. They're machines built by Jesus Christ for us men's sexual pleasure.
  6:25pm PMD:

Half my money goes to WFMU
  6:25pm Carmichael:

That which doesn't kill you only makes you wish you were dead.
  6:25pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

I'm losing the will to live...and I'm DEATH for Christ's sake!!!
  6:25pm G:

Go ahead and lie, Andy. You have practice.
  6:26pm Ike:

I assume the Book of Life knows that PMD is not Jewish, and thus refuses to list her.
  6:26pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Net or Gross?
  6:26pm PMD:

I mean half of Andy's money goes to WFMU
  6:26pm Matt from Springfield:

@Julian: I was imagining someone playing Hava Negilah with their armpit when that music came on!
  6:26pm G:

loved that angry hang-up sound
  6:27pm Greg from Va:

Did they not try to burn this book in 1933?
  6:27pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Andy, you better set up a fake charity, pronto...
  6:27pm Matt from Springfield:

@PMD: Was that really you? Glad to hear ya!
  6:28pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Thank goodness that is over.
  6:28pm Listener Julian:

Hava... thbppt... Nagila Hava... thbppt...
  6:28pm Carmichael:

Well, I have to go folks. The chauffeur is waiting.
  6:28pm moose:

l'shana tova
  6:28pm PMD:

Well, maybe....
  6:29pm Matt from Springfield:

In fact, why don't they devote a show to coming up with fake charities? It's pointless, sounds illegal, but probably has a loophole out of it.

Ken's "horn" is a new high-slash-low of 7SD.
  6:29pm G:

What was Andy doing as the new year started? Getting reamed by his wife for making a joke about her imminent death.
  6:29pm Dinah:

I'll blow that thing!!
  6:30pm Matt from Springfield:

@Carmichael: Have a good night!
Psst, can I get your chauffeur's number? What time does he get off. Hint hint...
  6:30pm listener mark:

reform judaism ?
  6:30pm G:

He's so reform he's Unitarian.
  6:31pm mike east:

I have a rams horn at work. Next time contact me and you guys can borrow it. No joke
  6:31pm Matt from Springfield:

@G: 7SD Listeners are very picky. We would demand and expect nothing less of Andy.
  6:31pm Greg from Va:

Imagining dying while listening to this show ... what implications does it purvey, what type of birth would one take after that?
  6:32pm kat330:

Don't eat the brown cantaloupe!
  6:32pm Ike:

"I think he's one of those anarchist Rabbis!" LOL LOL LOL! SSD actually made me laugh. Does that mean the world is ending now?
  6:32pm G:

His honey is pissed at him right now.
  6:34pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

The lawyer get paid in doubloons, of course!
  6:34pm Piracy Lawyer, Attorney-at-Law:

I collect NOTHING unless YOU WIN!

(If you do win however I expect you to go out and capture 40% more hostages to pay me with)
  6:35pm Fredericks:

The Somali pirates have plenty of good reasons to take those boats.
  6:36pm Greg from Va:

Over the course of the year, Andy is the mean.
  6:36pm Nat the Parker:

andy means median, not mean
  6:37pm Listener Julian:

Delivering the book-of-death news would go over a lot easier if they had a version of that funeral march with more farts.
  6:37pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Andy just suggested putting all the dead people in a given year in a pot...to make soup???
  6:38pm kat330:

@Nat -- finally, someone on the playlist who understands math!
  6:38pm Greg from Va:

When was the last time Andy wore a medium?
  6:38pm Listener Julian:

Don't tell me Irwin Chusid doesn't have an all-farts Chopin record.
  6:38pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

I wish I would have bought that boiler story insurance.
  6:38pm Geddy Lee:

I think you guys should celebrate Rush Hoshana instead. That and Ayn Rand's birthday.
  6:39pm moose:

it's 5772 not 22
  6:39pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Gonna party like it's 5799!!!
  6:39pm Neil Peart:

Stealing my thunder again, Geddy! I was into Ayn before you were into Ayn!!
  6:40pm kat330:

And tomorrow, I'll still be writing 5771 on my checks... (attribution, David Letterman).
  6:40pm Geddy Lee:

As in Chris E. Hynde?
  6:41pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

My name wasn't in the BOOK OF LIFE,
and all I got was this lousy tee shirt!
  6:42pm mike noble in dc:

those somali pirates are anti-corporate, anti-imperialist freedom fighters.
  6:43pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Stoning is barbaric...

Pebbling...not so bad.
  6:44pm Matt from Springfield:

Don't listen to them, new listeners! Most of the time they DON'T discuss their favorite scenes of Monty Python--that would be much better than their usual show!
  6:44pm Greg from Va:

Somali pirates subscribe to ADBUSTERS magazine!
  6:45pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Andy's stuck in the 3rd class compartment on the Showbiz Train.
  6:45pm Guesser:

Andy's career is in the Book of Death.
  6:46pm Greg from Va:

I can always tell the quality of the show by how much I find myself writing in the comments section.
  6:46pm Guesser:

Yes, the comments board is for people who are not entertained to find something to do.
  6:47pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Let's pray on it!
  6:49pm Greg from Va:

I've died a few times already, and it's an overrated experience.
,
Plus who edits the Book of LIfe?
  6:49pm kat330:

Did anyone hear K&A verify they are in the Book themselves?
  6:50pm Guesser:

@Andy: After that crack, Beth won't listen to any apology anyway.
  6:50pm giraffe-o:

another hour of 7SD? Say it ain't so!
  6:51pm G:

What, Nardwuar is not a Jewish name?!?!?!?!?!?!
  6:51pm Listener Dave from Seattle:

Finally, now we can all go outside and enjoy ourselves.
  6:52pm kat330:

Hello, hello? Is this thing on?
  6:53pm Dan B From Upstate:

@kat, yes, they're both in the book of life, as are their wives.
  6:53pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Only Reformed Jews use plastic sheets when they bleed a goy on Rosh Hoshana.
  6:55pm kat330:

@Dan B: Thanks. I thought Beth was not in -- or you mean Mary?
  6:55pm Greg from Va:

It's been 55 minutes already, I've lost much self esteem and confidence, feel irritable and my palms itch, god, this is bad, time to listen to my Tony Robbins tapes ... is my life pathetic or what?.
  6:56pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

I don't think Chis Christy could run for an Ice Cream Truck,
let alone for President!
  6:56pm kat330:

You can listen to the archive I was trying to find of the time I called in. Been waiting to tell Danne D I found it, but haven't seen the D in a while.
  6:57pm kat330:

June 23, 2004: The No-Tune-Out Celebrity-Spotting Show, right around the 14-minute mark.

Listening to that snippet again, Andy was actually quite pleasant, and I wasn't ridiculed during or after the call by either as I'd feared. [Thus, the nervous laughter and almost revealing the endgame when I started "jjj" and stopped myself. Still, I think it's a crapshoot whether the experience of calling in will be kind or cruel on any given topic.
  6:57pm PMD:

Where does Max from London rock climb?
  6:59pm Greg from Va:

I apologize to all those in the comments board for writing here today, now to sharpen the razor and cut ....

...some paper dolls.
  7:01pm NOW, I AM BECOME DEATH, THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS:

Maybe Andy's wife is better off dead.
  7:01pm Matt from Springfield:

Have a good night everyone!
  7:03pm Greg from Va:

I think everybody writes here in order to read what they write back to themselves, seriously.
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