Options Dinner at Andy’s with Ken and Andy: Playlist from May 25, 2011 Options

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The program formerly known as The Fuzzy Glove Hour, Whores, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

Wednesday 6 - 7pm (EDT) | On WFMU | 91.1, 90.1, 91.9 FM & wfmu.org
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Options May 25, 2011: Tonight's Show: Conference Call Party - call in at 1-570-310-0170 and use this access code: 6442009

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Ken and Andy  Seven Second Delay   Options

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Listener comments!

  6:01pm hopey:

Call, comment or both?

  6:02pm PMD:

OK, so where's everyone?
  6:02pm Danne D:

will try and do both
  6:02pm PMD:

  6:02pm Danne D:

stuck in an open area at work b/c no ac in my office that works
  6:04pm Spike:

I'm on the phone.

What's up, Danne D!!!
  6:05pm PMD:

Get on the phone!

Has this failed yet?
  6:06pm jaycjay:

I'm connected.
  6:06pm Danne D:

Mister Johnny! I'm on the call. It's chaos.

I'd love to see Ken and Andy lead these folks in a scary chant in unison
  6:06pm PMD:

It's failing... cannot communicate
  6:06pm CJ:

I'm here in the cacophony
  6:06pm Becky in SoCal:

this is bonkers.
  6:06pm -max-:

They could do a rousing rendition of "row, row, row your boat"...
  6:07pm t.quirk:

its escary in there.
  6:07pm Dr. Cam:

this is amazing.
  6:07pm Nick trhe Bard:

So, what, is there a topic or it just a mishmash free fpor all clusterfiretruck?
  6:07pm CJ:

I vote for 99 bottles of beer on the wall

Alexander Graham Bell is spinning in his grave.
  6:08pm lz:


More cowbell!!!
  6:09pm Generic Caller:

Can't believe I bothered to get through.
  6:10pm lz:

This is going to be the LONGEST show ever.

What, no vuvuzellas???
  6:10pm northguineahills:

this is awesome!!!!
  6:10pm Danne D:

about a 14 second lag or so between talking on line and hearing it on the web stream
  6:10pm Danne D:

  6:10pm pat:

wow this call is nuts
  6:11pm PMD:

I can't do this anymore!
  6:11pm Aharon:

The conference call line is melting my brain.
  6:11pm Nick the Bard:

I'm in the phone room, and I'm sitting here doing nothing. Just like any party I go to. Lovely.

14 Second Delay.

I love it.
  6:11pm Generic Caller:

This is a call? It's a noisefuck.
  6:11pm Danne D:

Hey Aharon, you wanna negotiate a trade on the conference call?
  6:11pm CJ:

this is what hell is going to be like
  6:11pm lz:

I am afraid to call and catch an STD.
  6:12pm Generic Caller:

14 Second Delay. Twice As Nice.
  6:12pm Aharon:

You know I do!
  6:12pm t.quirk:

New topic. Andy, this is your chance to hang up on 99 people at once. Do it.
  6:13pm Generic Caller:

Herding cats is not part of Andy's skillset.

Why don't they sing "I'd like to buy the World a Coke?"
  6:14pm deaf:

oh god
  6:14pm Danne D:

that toneless whistling is me
  6:14pm Generic Caller:

or, "All in all I'm just another brick in the wall of sound"
  6:14pm Aharon:

Danne, won't you join me in a "USA, USA" chant?

Speak up, Spike - we can't hear you.
  6:15pm Fredericks:

Where's the organ player?
  6:15pm trish:

How about an audio version of the wave?
  6:15pm PMD:

I want to join with SOMEONE saying SOMETHING - I don't want to just be a noise.
  6:15pm Producer Laura:

I'm on the call and can't hear Ken & Andy at all--is it just me?
  6:15pm jaycjay:

Now that toneless whistling is both of us.
  6:15pm hopey:

I'm just listening quietly. As usual.
  6:15pm hopey:

I'm just listening quietly. As usual.
  6:15pm t.quirk:

Control your minions.
  6:16pm Bryan:

I would like to request a written transcript of this week's show.
  6:16pm pat:

i can hear giberish and thats all.
  6:16pm PMD:

why should we be quiet?
  6:16pm Nick the Bard:

Give me the 100 dollars!!I deserve it the most!

Hey - 99 callers - turn down your radios!!!
  6:17pm trish:

Is there a recording in there ?
  6:17pm deaf:

turn down ur radios
  6:17pm northguineahills:

What Bryan said!
  6:17pm PMD:

Tell us how many people on the phone!
  6:18pm PMD:

I"m #3
  6:18pm J J:

I think I hear Don Tulius and Joel Clark.

  6:18pm Danne D:

  6:18pm deaf:

that spaceship noise is making it ten times worse
  6:18pm Generic Caller:

I've heard recorded cacophony like this on some FMU shows. No names, though. :-P
  6:18pm Jillian:

Is this the zombie apocalypse I've been hearing about?
  6:19pm Danne D:

whistling rocky and bullwinkle right now
  6:19pm PMD:

no, we cannot talk to each other. when there were 4 people we could
  6:19pm hamburger / london:

who wants to play marco polo?
  6:19pm Nick the Bard:

I'm not Rapaport.
  6:19pm drewo:

99 bottles of beer would be a good sing-along
  6:19pm Brass Knuckles:

If the hosts would shut up maybe I could enjoy listening to this thing.
  6:19pm deaf:

i agree with drewo
  6:19pm Danne D:

cool - I can hear my bullwinkle whistling in the background! :D
  6:20pm PMD:

I can only make out Ken and Andy's voice on the call because I hear it on the radio first
  6:20pm ?:

This is one of the coolest things ever. I hope a recording of this is made available without the voiceover.
  6:20pm Danne D:

let's see if i can hear my pmd shout out
  6:20pm Generic Caller:

This is the wailng and gnashing of teeth of the
"left behind"
  6:20pm Mike McKenzie:

I wonder if FRANGRY is wearing her bikini right now?
  6:20pm dc pat fc:

The delay is killing you guys
  6:20pm Danne D:

Hmm, what if I put the phone up to my headphones....
  6:20pm ?:

Number 9, number 9, number 9...
  6:20pm PMD:

I hear block that kick! And I hear row row row
  6:20pm lz:

People are playing the show over the phone because there is no way to listen to Ken and Andy through the noise in the conference room!
  6:21pm Jack:

  6:21pm Generic Caller:

The advice for this episode should be "Find anything in this show that is NOT a fatal flaw."
  6:22pm 666:

A cat is dying
  6:22pm trish:

I hear a shitty recording in the room.
  6:22pm Mike McKenzie:

If only we had gotten RAPTURED last Saturday - we wouldn't have to endure this horror.
  6:23pm hopey:

I can't listen to the radio app and be on the call at the same time. Ah, well.
  6:24pm Generic Caller:

Last person to change the station or turn the sound down gets the wine.
  6:24pm PMD:

I may need to go to another location so I can yell and be heard at least once.
  6:25pm Nick the Bard:

I'm actually screaming into the phone and I can't hear it on the radio. Crazyness.
  6:25pm John McCabe in L.A.:

try everyone muting
  6:26pm Danne D:

ooh I just heard my HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO like lloyd lindsay young
  6:26pm lorenzo:

Someone is playing a melodica.

Tontine - or Pyramid Scheme?
Andy, you're just a half-assed Bernie Madoff.
  6:27pm Producer Laura:

Keep screaming, Nick!

Someone call the Internet Police - for Christ's sake!
  6:28pm hopey:

Is this worse than the meeting conference call from a couple of weeks ago?
  6:29pm PMD:

can you hang up and make everyone call back?
  6:29pm PMD:

can you hang up and make everyone call back?
  6:29pm Producer Laura:

Hahaahahhaah I think I heard Nick screaming finally.
  6:29pm jaycjay:

It's a lot like the meeting conference call I had for work a couple of weeks ago.
  6:30pm Generic Caller:

This puts anyone's found-sound talkover loop to shame.
  6:30pm hopey:

I heard a long scream.
  6:30pm Nick the Bard:

If all the dumb people have to leave the confrence room, would'n't Andy have to leave the studio?
  6:31pm Generic Caller:

This is the high-tech equivalent of the Black Hole of Calcutta.
  6:31pm Julie:

I just got here, WTF? How may people on so far?
  6:31pm Danne D:

no kidding jaycjay - we had one where they were rolling out a new head of our nationwide organization and there was one person who kept saying HELLLLLLLLLLLLO over and over again - it was funnier than this though.
  6:31pm Meghan:

This explains why it is only certain people who are allowed on the air......
  6:32pm hopey:

I think I just heard Nick the Bard?
  6:32pm Listener zero:

  6:32pm Producer Laura:

Hi Julie! We have no way to tell how many people are on the call, sadly.
  6:32pm PMD:

Ken, whatcha doing in SF? Wave as you fly into SFO
  6:32pm Danne D:

Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa we're halfway there!!!!!!!!!!!!
  6:32pm Burt's Bee:

Train + wreck = ?
  6:33pm paat:

i'm listening to both the call and show.
  6:33pm Danne D:

Whhhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!! Living on a prayer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  6:33pm Julie:

What are you hearing on your phone?
  6:33pm Meghan:

it kinda makes me want to bang my head on the wall
  6:33pm PMD:

WFMU plays by no rules. Neither do its listeners.
@ paat me too. Though, my phone headset is on the desk. I can't take it.
  6:34pm Julie:

Can we all sing a chorus of the Kinks "party line?"
  6:34pm Julie:

@Meghan are you on the phone?

Ken should hold him down and pierce Andy's other nipple.
  6:34pm paat:

alright i cant take it the call anymore. i might rejoin later. and put the phone up to my speakers.
  6:36pm Nick the Bard:

OK, I think it's circulating who's getting the loudest in the room.
  6:36pm Burt's Bee:

The mopiness of REM vs. Bruce Springsteen? I think even Ken has lost the will to live tonight.

I think it's long past time to euthanize this episode.
  6:37pm Meghan:

Zoey sounds like the kid from Poltergeist stuck in the tv..... freaking creepy
  6:37pm Burt's Bee:

Where is Dr. Remulak when you need him?
  6:38pm Meghan:

No I am not Julie..... it's freaking me out
  6:38pm marq:

trying to call for zoe. ringing
  6:38pm Radio Announcer:

and it... it's a terrific crash, ladies and gentlemen. It's smoke, and it's in flames now, and the frame is crashing to the ground, not quite to the mooring mast. Oh, the humanity! And all the passengers screaming around here. I told you; it—I can't even talk to people, their friends are out there! Ah! It's... it... it's a... ah! I... I can't talk, ladies and gentlemen. Honest: it's just laying there, mass of smoking wreckage. Ah! And everybody can hardly breathe and talk and the screaming. Lady, I... I... I'm sorry. Honest: I... I can hardly breathe. I... I'm going to step inside, where I cannot see it.
  6:38pm Julie:

How about Mr Chin?
  6:38pm Danne D:

Woohoo :) I was on the radio :)
  6:39pm Danne D:

And I really am impressed that they have 100 listeners. I'm on the call but I'm being silent....thus hogging a space that an obnoxious person would have :)
  6:39pm PMD:

Ah Danne - now I know your real voice!
  6:39pm Danne D:

Andy has taken on the air of someone who is interviewing disaster victims.
  6:39pm jaycjay:

When I heard "it's like a conference call I was on last week" I thought the radio was broadcasting my thoughts.
  6:40pm Danne D:

Is that Ken's daughter (or Andy's daughter) saying daddy daddy daddy over and over again :) If so we hear ya.
  6:40pm paat:

wooo i got though
  6:41pm Meghan:

yeah hang up saying the horror about Boston!
  6:41pm Julie:

I am surprised that many people will call, but they don't know how many, right?
  6:41pm Danne D:

  6:41pm paat:

this has to be 7secdelays finest hour!
  6:42pm Danne D:

I remember when they gave out Andy's cell number and I texted "welccome to hell, Andy" to him - well I have to say that this is like the 8th circle of said hell
  6:42pm Danne D:

This really is an epic show. 5 years from now when Andy finally has a job again and is missing a show this is the first rerun they should air.


Is that like "MC Hammer?"
  6:42pm cosmic matrix:

DJs just be quiet for a while so we can enjoy the sounds
  6:43pm Burt's Bee:

If by finest hour you mean worst of the worst....
  6:43pm Danne D:

I wonder what this show would sound on 33 RPM instead of the 78 RPM it seems to be like.
  6:43pm Producer Laura:

I love the dude just groaning "heeeeeey" in the background every once in awhile. It kind of sounds like a loop.
  6:43pm Danne D:

Jethro Tull got through!
  6:44pm marq:

still trying to get through. zoe is chomping
  6:44pm Burt's Bee:

More sea shanties!
  6:44pm John McCabe in L.A.:

its the rapture
  6:44pm cosmic matrix:

thanks that was good
  6:45pm Burt's Bee:

I could post more if I knew how to add.
  6:45pm Danne D:

If someone says let him have it chris! this will be just like aerial view :)
  6:45pm Generic Caller:

@Danne: Epic show, as in EPIC FAIL
  6:45pm t.quirk:

The call room changes you.
  6:45pm Rev. Camping:

I sincerely thank you for making me look competent.
  6:46pm Julie:

Oh good god this is unpleasant...it's like being just about anywhere in Manhattan
  6:46pm Danne D:

whoa the conference called me back (or more likely my cell phone just did something weird). Still being quiet...
  6:46pm Burt's Bee:

If only we could make an amusing anecdote about this that we could send in to the Metropolitan Diary!
  6:47pm Nick the Bard:

And as usual I get hung up on...
  6:47pm Danne D:

@Generic Caller: The Greatest Failure is still the greatest something :)

Everyone chant:

  6:48pm Danne D:

This show is so bad that Ken is actually bring up Nazi stories to cheer things up.
  6:48pm Burt's Bee:

  6:48pm Ange:

ken and andy - don't worry! today's show is way scarier than the recent tornado warnings in my area!
  6:48pm Danne D:

okay everyone get ready for the big finishing number!
  6:49pm Nazis:

We shoulda done this to the Jews. Much deadlier than Zyklon gas.
  6:49pm Mr.Donut:

Mengele went to Brazil.
  6:49pm Meghan:

I love that they have made it white noise in the background and you can't really hear anyone. it's great!
  6:50pm Danne D:

This woulda gotten Noriega outta that compound way faster than the rock and roll they played.
  6:50pm Mr.Donut:

I met his niece. No kidding.
  6:50pm Burt's Bee:

Ken is interested in Nazi UFO stories? Oh, and he thought this show concept was a good idea too? Explains a lot.
  6:50pm Davin:

That was a Doctor Who episode, "Aliens of London". Fake aliens crash land in the Thames who are medically modified pigs.
  6:50pm Doctor Mengle:

Hey - it was worth a shot!

Don't be a hater, Andy.
  6:50pm Mr.Donut:

Nice thing to find about your jolly old uncle, eh?
  6:51pm HCCC:

Someone record the conference call! This is like the best free jazz ever.
  6:51pm PMD:

I had to get out.
  6:51pm Mengele:

Learn to spell your name, doctor.
  6:51pm Jillian:

They make medications for this, you know.
  6:51pm Marmalade Kitty:

Is Kenny G directing this show?
  6:51pm Burt's Bee:

Doesn't the conference call sound like snippets from 'Do Or DIY' ?
  6:52pm Danne D:

They are just gonna suck ya back in PMD...
  6:52pm 16 hours on the Phone Amtraks Lady:

Oh hell no!
  6:52pm Doctor Mengle:

Did you see the movie "The Alien Boys from Brazil?"
  6:52pm Julie:

@MK if it was Kenny G's show you'd hear all the colors piped all the way up! Kenny's sorry he didn't think of this.
  6:53pm Generic Caller:

I hung up after three minutes. I heard the droning groaning sound more than clearly enough on the radio.
  6:53pm Julie:

are these people talking to each other? Or just yapping?
  6:54pm Listener Eric:

I'm on the conference call, but I've been on mute and just muted the show for five minutes to watch (listen) to the Joplin, MO tornado video that Ken mentioned. Is that unethical?
  6:54pm Danne D:

yes, Julie
  6:55pm Doctor Mengle:

Has BUCK HENRY called into the conference call?
  6:55pm Burt's Bee:

I think the conversation robot has been playing the melodica tonight.
  6:55pm Generic Caller:

If Dick Cavett hears this, he will CANCEL YOUR ASSES.
  6:55pm jaycjay:

@Mr.Donut, according to the book, there was an unaccounted-for two year period before he turned up in Brazil.
  6:56pm HCCC:

It's nearly midnight here; I'm blasting the conference call plus the show and jamming along... Flatmate doesn't seem to understand what I'm doing.
  6:56pm zoe:

can't get through you idiots. you ask me to call and can't get through.
  6:56pm Burt's Bee:

Place your bets: Which guest from the UCB show is listening tonight and then canceling?
  6:57pm Doctor Mengle:

I was chillin out on the West Coast for those missing two years.
  6:57pm Burt's Bee:

HCCC, there's a reason people don't understand what you're doing.
  6:57pm Danne D:

  6:57pm Yoo Hoo:

ALICE vs. Andymatic Zingatron? Please?
  6:57pm hopey:

I have actually listened to this entire show.
  6:57pm Burt's Bee:

Yoo. Hoo.
  6:57pm Meghan:

HA! You tell them Zoe! You tell them!
  6:58pm Doctor Mengle:

Ya sure this is Zoe?
  6:58pm Generic Caller:

Just when you think it couldn't get any worse, they put a kid on the air.
  7:00pm Burt's Bee:

Out of Talent. New show name.
  7:00pm Doctor Mengle:

Is that the MONDO theme?
  7:00pm Robert:

Stinko show. Complete stinko. I hope Ken saved up a last minute laugh line.
  7:00pm Danne D:

Good job everyone!!!!
  7:00pm Danne D:

Rerun this episode!!!!
  7:00pm Generic Caller:

  7:01pm Burt's Bee:

"Worst SSD ever." Preach, Ken.
  7:01pm Doctor Mengle:

It can only get better from this!!
  7:45pm Marmalade Kitty:

  9:07pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Put this on UBUWEB!
  1:49pm Tim:

Classic 7SD Trainwreck! Awesome. :D
  2:04pm Tim:

Radio dada
  5:28pm em2:

Absolutely one for the books.
  6:43pm Tyler:

It's Donny Wahlberg Yo!
  11:52am woj:

best show ever. really.
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