Options Dinner at Andy’s with Ken and Andy: Playlist from August 11, 2010 Options

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The program formerly known as The Fuzzy Glove Hour, Whores, and The Happiness Hut. Ken and Andy, also known as The Enema Boys, further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards on a weekly basis. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options August 11, 2010: Andy's Last Ever Prank Phone Call

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Listener comments!

  6:02pm John McCabe in LA:

hi people
  6:03pm Mr. Johnny:

Love the show!
  6:04pm Dan B From Upstate:

I love NPR!
  6:04pm John McCabe in LA:

you can't believe you got through
  6:05pm Mr. Johnny:

JMiLA- what's Frangry up to?
  6:05pm agent hoopz:

plz lord let this title be untrue.
  6:07pm Prank Phones:

Shit, now we're obsolete as MySpace.
  6:08pm Prank Phones:

Can't believe we love the show. Yes, it *is* hard to believe...
  6:09pm Mr. Johnny:

What's the topic tonight?
  6:09pm John McCabe in LA:

she is coming home from work and probably eating at a cafe for dinner right now she will get on her tumblr blog in an hr or so
  6:10pm Danne D:

Moving was an awesome movie btw :)
I was so proud to say that I met the man who made it as I watched!
  6:10pm Mr. Johnny:

Where does she work?
  6:10pm Danne D:

Don't Do it Ken!

You'll bankrupt the station!
  6:11pm Mr. Johnny:

What's the phone number?
  6:12pm Listener zero:


Listener zero weighing in to rain on everybody's parade -- why did the fishing show not take place?
  6:12pm Danne D:

Usually it's 201-209-9368

Sometimes it's not.
  6:12pm Mr. Johnny:

How many times has Andy been married?
  6:12pm Alex G. Bell:

For this I labored? Thank God I'm deaf.
  6:14pm Window Ledge:

I'm right over here, stupid.
  6:14pm Danne D:

Hmm, maybe I can audit this course, I'm actually in Trenton as I type this.
  6:15pm Mr. Johnny:

$850,000 for a kitchen?
What kind of kitchen do you get for that kind of dough?
  6:15pm Dan B From Upstate:

One with several round the clock chefs.
  6:15pm Adjunct Teaching Salary:

Normally about 2000-2500 for a 14-week course. Good luck with the mortgage.
  6:16pm Danne D:

Why do I think this'll end up as some sort of Clockwork Orange deal where once he makes this call there'll be like a million prank revenge calls to Andy?
  6:16pm Louis Lame:

life ruiner
  6:16pm Mr. Johnny:

A dime for a phone call?
Was that a hundred years ago?
  6:17pm Danne D:

Andy's Bowels - I thought what happens at Jose Tejas stays at Jose Tejas
  6:17pm Listener John:

Hey, couldn't Andy get a job as an artist in residence at a 4-year university with a communications program, such as Rutgers? Or one that has a film program, such as NYU? Perhaps he should apply for GENIUS in residence.
  6:18pm Adjunct Teaching Salary:

See above
  6:18pm agent hoopz:

this is all so sad.
  6:19pm Danne D:

I wonder what a "Little Ken and Andy" show would be like (ala "Little Monk")
  6:19pm Vincent Van G.:

No one appreciates artists like me and Andy till after we've done away with ourselves.
  6:20pm Mr. Johnny:

Alan Arkin was in the "Jerky Boys" movie!!!
  6:20pm Danne D:

To be good, this prank phone must require an old woman crying.
  6:21pm Danne D:

wow, I'm actually on the same wave length as ken
  6:21pm ?:

Skype. Directory.
  6:22pm monster.com:

The job market for cruel misanthropes is not huge at the moment.
  6:22pm Listener zero:

I think I heard the garbage truck in the parking lot.
  6:23pm Danne D:

Jerky Boys movie:
  6:23pm Mr. Johnny:

Couldn't Tom Scharpling give Andy a job?
  6:23pm Listener zero:

A great prank phone call idea is to look up personal ads like from craiglist and then call the people who solicited them. Then you make the conversation about an intentional misunderstanding of the original ad.
  6:24pm agent hoopz:

  6:24pm Dan B From Upstate:

I miss the studio audience. Those shows were so depressing!
  6:25pm Dan B From Upstate:

You know... there's no rule saying Andy can only make one call this hour. Just as long as he doesn't make any more after seven PM!
  6:25pm Danne D:

Hmm, this Andy prank idea of calling the studio is kinda like the plot calling the kettle black.
  6:25pm hamburger:

just tuned in.. never heard an andy crank call - would love to hear a craigslist one
  6:25pm Listener John:

Hey Adjunct Teaching Salary: He'd have to be in some separately-funded institute or have some kind of chair that has a line on the university budget. He could probably endow his own chair, or maybe get WFMU listeners to pledge at next week's show (and the week after that, etc. etc.)
  6:26pm Oscar:

Whatever you call, don't call 678-7743.
  6:26pm Bad Ronald:

Call an airline and ask to book a flight from JFK to the new mosque at ground zero once it's erected.
  6:28pm Listener zero:

What Bad Ronald said. Become politically RELEVANT again like during that Cartoon of Death show.
  6:28pm Mr. Johnny:

Could Andy be gay-programmed?
  6:28pm Danne D:

Really Andy should just call Don McLean and come full circle
  6:29pm Adjunct Teaching Salary:

Good luck getting that approved, Listener John. Contact a Chancellor and ask for a meeting. *After* you have all the money *in hand*.

Actually, if you have all the money in hand, just give it to Andy, and cut out an organization as self-serving and controlling as a large university.
  6:30pm Dan B From Upstate:

We all already know Andy's cell phone number.
  6:30pm Listener zero:

I don't. I was asleep during that marathon show. :-(
  6:31pm Dan B From Upstate:

Ah, well, it's 201- *is taken away by ninjas*
  6:32pm Danne D:

In a moment of weakness I promised Ken I would cease calling as an act of mercy

Still think my "Welcome To Hell" text was inspired though :)
  6:32pm New Jersey University System:

The Trenton branch is the only branch in the state scarier than the Newark branch.
  6:33pm Danne D:

Sounds like a great idea for next week: "Andy tries to find a working pay phone"
  6:34pm ?:

just turn off caller id on the cell phone?
  6:35pm Listener zero:

Hashing out this call for another ten minutes is going to be GREAT COMEDY! :D
  6:35pm Danne D:

Andy should ask the person to meet him at the Howard Johnson's restaurant
  6:36pm Danne D:

and to be sure to bring their 8-track tapes too
  6:36pm Comedy:

Ask me to meet you. That might help.
  6:37pm agent hoopz:

  6:38pm Bored Op:

  6:38pm Danne D:

something like this actually happened where I worked. This guy who was in a group home or something kept dialing for his mom but had a wrong number. It was actually kinda sad :(
  6:39pm Listener zero:

Behind every piece of comedy there is a tragedy left untold.
  6:40pm Danne D:

Comedy is you falling down a manhole
Tragedy is me stubbing my toe.

-Alan King
  6:40pm Mr. Johnny:

How's Frangry's butt doing?
  6:40pm PMD:

Glad there's audience participation in thisone.
  6:41pm Cottage cheese:

How do you think it's doing?
  6:41pm Listener zero:

Danne D, did you ever call in?
  6:42pm Mr. Johnny:

Not too bad, for it's age.
  6:42pm Dead Air:

I roooooooooooooooolllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!
  6:43pm Danne D:

See for your self, Johnny :)

@listener zero: tonight or to last week's SUW?
  6:44pm Mr. Johnny:

Listening to this episode is a chore.
  6:44pm Danne D:

I have to break down and admit that I laughed at andy's "phone bingo" comment
  6:44pm Listener zero:

Danne D: ever.

Mr. Johnny: I am having GREAT FUN (trainwreck fan).
  6:45pm mary Wessling:

Why don't they have a caller send them a number of someone they know who is home and who will answer their phone?
  6:45pm Mr. Johnny:

I done like it.
I LOVE it!
  6:45pm listener 108365:

the fatal flaw approacheth--caller ID
  6:45pm PMD:

why doesn't andy do the blow by blow in the mickey mouse voice?
  6:45pm Listener John:

Hey, Adjunct Teaching Salary: Wouldn't it help to discredit an organization as self-serving & controlling as a large university, if Andy had an endowed chair?
I'm not enthusiastic about higher education myself -- whenever I get a chance, I tell the younger generation "Stay out of the humanities, kids -- it's a long hard road to hell."
  6:46pm Adjunct Teaching Salary:

Almost as long and hard as the plan you proposed!
  6:46pm Danne D:

Heck L-zero, I've called plenty of times.
My first call to this show was on an episode called "20 Questions" from like '93 I think or something like that. They put $25 into Western Union and the password was the answer to a 20-questions game. Would love to hear it as a rerun some day.
  6:47pm Mr. Johnny:

Does anyone think that Andy has ever been bowling?
If yes, what was his score?
  6:47pm Listener zero:

I don't recall your name being said on the air.....
  6:47pm Hollywood:

It's back to script doctoring and work on spec, Andy Boy.
  6:48pm Danne D:

My favorite interaction with Andy probably was when I was working the phone room during the marathon a few years ago. Andy decided to call in and see how we answered the phone. Once I realized who it was, I said "Oh, it's Andy" and hung up. Quality.
  6:48pm Mr. Johnny:

Call a Bowling Alley, Andy!
  6:48pm Autoerotic Lizard:

I'm still autoeroticizing here can u pleeez stop calling me!!!!
  6:49pm Danne D:

I usually don't self-identify with Danne D in any calls I make. I also call SUW more ofter than SSD these days.

About 90% of my calls are utter failures.

I'm better as a board commentator :)

Have you ever called, L-zero?
  6:49pm Lounge Lizard:

Haven't I seen you here before, sweetcheeks?
  6:49pm Listener zero:

Danne D: yeah, several times, to rain on their parade. was on the air only once, though.
  6:49pm Mr. Johnny:

Is this the worst show ever?
  6:50pm T.Quirk:

I think it might be coming around.
  6:50pm djspidermanZ:

Great show-- reminds me a bit of "foot fone" we used to play when drunk. randomlly slap the phone with foot until get a call and then busk a bit of punking--- soooo juveniley delicious---- WFMU rules
  6:50pm Mr. Johnny:

Call Red at the Tube Bar. That would be funny.
  6:50pm Danne D:

which show - is it in the archive?

I have to say that I've heard worse from them, Johnny.
  6:50pm Tom Sharpling:

This is why Seven Second Delay is truly the finest of all WFMU shows.
  6:51pm 7SD historian:

Out of 20 years of shows, it would take a lot of archive listening to determine the worst evAR.
  6:51pm T.Quirk:

Andy plays senile very naturally.
  6:51pm Danne D:

What bowling alley closes at 7pm?
  6:51pm Red:

If I find you I'll cut your guts open and show you all the black stuff you have inside of you.
  6:51pm hamburger:

  6:51pm Dan B From Upstate:

I gotta' admit... I AM laughing...
  6:52pm Danne D:

great reference!
  6:52pm Mr. Johnny:

Both Ken & Andy sound very demoralized.
  6:52pm 7SD historian:

And why the hell not, Mr. J.?
  6:52pm Danne D:

OMG! It actually worked?!??
  6:53pm Danne D:

can't be the worst show ever. actual evidence of premise success
  6:53pm Skirkie:

I feel a little bad for liking this.
  6:53pm Dan B From Upstate:

Wow. This is just like Lost!
  6:53pm PMD:

"Now I can die"
  6:53pm T.Quirk:

how long is that theme song? 6 minutes?
  6:53pm ange:

"now you can die, and I just feel like dying."
  6:54pm Mr. Johnny:

They should make a t-shirt about this show.
  6:54pm Danne D:

Andy should spend a week listening to old Seven Second Delays for inspiration
  6:54pm Listener zero:

How about we all die? We can pull a Jonestown!
  6:55pm 7SD historian:

Koolaid, comin' right up. On the house!
  6:55pm Mr. Johnny:

You mean Jonesville Station.
  6:55pm forked tongue:

Silvio Breckman should make more prank calls on future shows!
  6:55pm T.Quirk:

I think we all deserve an apology for this show.
  6:55pm Skirkie:

You're supposed to be out of pay phone money remember?
  6:55pm Jim:

Drink it
  6:55pm Danne D:

good god - you know Ken's demoralized when he's reading the comments board
  6:55pm Lizardner Dave:

The cub scouts were still worse.
  6:56pm forked tongue:

ANDY's last, not necessarily SILVIO's!
  6:56pm 7SD historian:

Call a Chinese restaurant and request an order of Chop Suey Cide
  6:56pm ?:

sylvio breckman needs to live!!!!
  6:56pm ange:

good news! crazy legs conti is down for the dart idea!
  6:56pm agent hoopz:

the cub scouts episode is great? i can never tell if the haters are being sarcastic.
  6:57pm Mr. Johnny:

Program Andy Gay!!!!
  6:57pm Michael:

sylvio breckman sleeps with the fishes.
  6:57pm Lizardner Dave:

Silvio Breckman should get a Twitter feed. It should have updates once a day that say "Where's my son to pick me up at the bowling alley?"
  6:57pm Dan B From Upstate:

I need to find the cub scouts episode, I think.
  6:57pm Skirkie:

I think you mean Furio, Ken
  6:58pm 7SD historian:

Laughing themselves to death in despair. Brutal.
  6:58pm Mr. Johnny:

I want a refund.
  6:58pm Skirkie:

Silvio was the one who played in Bruce Springsteen's band.
  6:58pm Listener John:

Yeah, Silvio was the sharp dresser who was Tony's consigliere.
  6:59pm Danne D:

Have a good night SSD fans!
  6:59pm Frangry's Butt:

See you later
  7:01pm Listener zero:

night night
  7:01pm poutWest:

Yeah, so you call the guy and he is nice enough to do the favor for you and so in the end ... We have one less nice person on the planet because he saw through your scam... good work!
  7:03pm Cottage cheese:

Frangry's butt has eyes? Gruesome.
  7:06pm Frangry:

One brown eye!
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