Options Seven Second Delay with Ken and Andy: Playlist from April 12, 2017 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options April 12, 2017: The Telenovela Episode
Ken and Andy attempt to prove the old "best ideas = biggest trainwrecks" adage wrong by reenacting a Spanish language telenovela, but in English. They intend to read the English subtitles out loud while the show plays in the background. One problem - the script consists of 30 characters! So to cover that, Andy plays the part of the Ryan Gosling-esque Nicholas Nunez, Ken plays the part of the classically beautiful Rena Ortiz (aka "Four Eyes"), and Michelle (from Shut Up Weirdo) will play the part of Estefania, the adult film actress. The rest of the parts are to be covered by one female and one male caller.

The first portion of the show is dedicated to casting. Rem calls in and volunteers to read the male parts. And the female parts will be covered by caller Pam. This takes a little longer to cast since for females, Andy stronly encourages approval to participate from a boyfriend or husband.

After casting, the reading begins. It's rough going at first, with much confusion and finger-pointing. Andy is frequently lost, and Rem has to deal with a ten second delay. Eventually the gang rights the ship, but it ain't easy! Wish we could say it was worth it, but it was not. Worth it, that is. Before long, Andy loses the will to live in a very big way. Ken gets angry. Pam and Michelle perform swimmingly.

Recap by Andrew M.

Listen to this show: MP3 - 128K | | Add or read comments

Artist Track
Ken and Andy  Seven Second Delay   Options

Listener comments!

Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 5:45pm Listener Joe:

Firstis-ious !!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 5:52pm Old Dave:

Aver si puedo....
No puedo.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:01pm howard in nyc:

what is spanish for 'fatal flaw'?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:02pm wizard frog:

Telenovela :o
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:03pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Fatal flaw: Must have another telenovela next week to continue the story, and the week after that, etc.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:05pm Andrea and James:

Is the song over?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:06pm PMD:

tele-nutella
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:07pm dale:

is the guy from sabado gigante in this?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:07pm common:

Sounds good
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:08pm Old Dave:

Habra caballos?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:08pm howard in nyc:

Can I play the role that dresses up in the bee costume?
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:08pm Nacho:

Suerte con el español!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:09pm Fredericks:

Intriguing.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:09pm Fredericks:

Do you have to try out for month to get the part?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:09pm howard in nyc:

quatro ojos.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:09pm Huge:

¡No me gusta!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:10pm Old Dave:

howard, you are at the wrong border. Bee costume most recently in Trailer Park Boys...
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:10pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Michele is portraying a porn star. NOT a hooker. Let's keep that clear.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:10pm Nick the Bard:

At least this isn't a Korean daiily drama episode
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:11pm Marcel M:

@Cliff: She would have to do something different than her day job or its not acting!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:11pm Fredericks:

Hola!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:11pm ass cab:

Esto no funciona puede
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:11pm Andres Cantor:

Gooooooooooooaaallll!!!!!!!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:12pm howard in nyc:

The other day I tuned into the latest Trailer Park Boys, their European road trip, and I had to ask myself, am I still laughing at these dudes after all these years? Sadly, yes I am.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:12pm ass cab:

Jugar concierto en Montclair, tengo que ir bye
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:13pm Fredericks:

No puedo creer que lo haya conseguido!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:15pm quantico bob:

Andy can I get a SAG waiver?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:16pm Sebastian:

"it's either my wife...or a female caller" classic Andy!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:16pm Nick the Bard:

Yeh,. make ME out to the be creep on the show...
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:16pm Doctor Rembrandt:

This is Rem, this is going to be crazy
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:17pm Old Dave:

I just want to insert dialects of the poor telenovela victims around the world who are hooked on this crap.
Okay?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:18pm dale:

hooker with a corazon de oro.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm Sebastian:

woah
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm dale:

jeesus - this IS pornographic!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm howard in nyc:

This is exactly how I've always pictured Michelle's weeding
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm Marcel M:

so we are supposed to watch the stream and listen? I'm confused
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm dale:

i'm moving to mexico!!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:19pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

This is more train-wrecky than usual. So awesome
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:20pm Marcel M:

ohh we mute it?! I get it
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:20pm Sebastian:

I think I'll be turning off that jabbering and watch that....
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:20pm Chud:

Yeah, the 7 second delay is doubled....
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:21pm Bas NL:

Kill the 7SD!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:21pm Sebastian:

this is so horrible, wonderful!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:21pm howard in nyc:

and the lack of time synchronization is the first of many fatal flaws
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:22pm common:

Art
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:22pm Spoiler:

Victor to Rossa do you as your hhusband i do i now you may kiss the bride
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:22pm Sebastian:

he's gonna burst in and stop the wedding!!!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:22pm Spoiler:

Nicolas
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:23pm howard in nyc:

She ain't running no more
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:23pm Sebastian:

shit!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:23pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

....he already burst in and stopped the wedding... are the web viewers out of sync too?!?!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:23pm melinda:

Four-eyes, haha
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:25pm Old Dave:

Puta!
Applies to men and women here.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:25pm Doctor Rembrandt:

my vide is behind
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:25pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

I am so bewildered
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:26pm Doctor Rembrandt:

video is lagging
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:26pm Sebastian:

they actually call her four-eyes all the time!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:26pm Ken From Hyde Park:

The Wake And Bake timeslot should devote 10-15 each day for this telenovela stuff. It'll either build a devoted fanbase or drive listeners away forever.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:26pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

My vid is ahead of the studio, ay ay ay
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:27pm Marcel M:

Mine too Cliff... haha. It makes it interesting.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:27pm wizard frog:

yo soy un llamo haha
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:28pm Sebastian:

there are so many different delays at work here. I'm positive it enhances the experience.
Four-eyes is a dummy.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:28pm Dean:

The video is ahead, I'm gonna guess, about seven seconds.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:28pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

I guess it's the 7 second delay?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:28pm Listener Joe:

Turn down the video-audio a little bit...
Love, can't, long, first ...
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:29pm dale:

my feed is WAY behind. makes it better i guess. ken sounds like when he was using the child's voice.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:30pm por?!$$&9;:

I heart telenovolas
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:30pm Sebastian:

would you look at that ponytail
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:30pm Just Ted:

I must say I'm impressed with the technology behind this.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:30pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Wait, she still lost her earring? I can barely follow any of this, hahahaha
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:31pm Marcel M:

@Ted: Impressed is a funny word, isn't it?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:32pm Sebastian:

I think she found it, Cliff. woah, that blouse is slutty!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:32pm Just Ted:

@Marcel nugs is a funny word too.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:32pm Just Ted:

as is dank.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:33pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Yeah her outfit was great. And Four-Eyes isn't wearing contacts right now? She can barely see at all??
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm Sebastian:

how does four-eyes see anything without her glasses?
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm Spoiler:

my Vid feed is way ahead...WOW! can they show tht kind of explicit sex on Spanish Language TV? Holy smoke!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm wizard frog:

What's the name of this series? I have to find out what happens after this episode
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm Sebastian:

exactly!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm Old Dave:

Druga para los pobres!
Let's celebrate that.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:34pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Off comes the dress!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:35pm Nick the Bard:

staging a live reading of the first episode of Spanish-language Telenovela "Reina de Corazons" (Queen of Hearts)
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:35pm Sebastian:

uuuuuoooooohhhh
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:35pm dale:

don't know how i'd feel about a porn star coming on to me. a fantasy yes, but the reality of the all the fluids she's been around.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:36pm wizard frog:

wow it has 8.7 on imdb :o
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:36pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Aww, they're kicking Four-Eyes out of the party.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:37pm Spoiler:

Ouch! alligator clips!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:37pm wizard frog:

There are 140 episodes of this show :O
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:37pm Sebastian:

do you think four-eyes banana fingers could stick?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:37pm Fredericks:

Nunez is a loaded name these days.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:37pm Just Ted:

The handshake!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:38pm Rindig:

El trolla!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:38pm Fredericks:

Texting and drinking and driving!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:38pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Drunk-crying driving while texting, bad idea
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:38pm Just Ted:

Bruh!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm wizard frog:

C'mon Bruh!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm Old Dave:

Can we assume WFMU is about to launch a Rifftrax version stream?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm wizard frog:

OUCH!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm Nicholas in Montclair:

Do they tip in Mexico? Maybe the valet was from the states.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm Sebastian:

damn, now my stream is lagging!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm dale:

this scene get's two thumbs up.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:39pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Ooh la la, Four-eyes has a nice backside
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:40pm Sebastian:

I'm stuck with the crappy valet
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:40pm Andrea and James:

You guys are rude creeps
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:42pm dale:

is that ryan gosling?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:42pm Just Ted:

Crying-drunk-texting-driving is OK as long as its in another country, right???
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:42pm wizard frog:

This guy is persistent o_o
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:42pm Ken From Hyde Park:

This is not unlike Jo Firestone's Romeo And Juliet episode.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:42pm Nicholas in Montclair:

I knew he wasn't going to take the stairs. That suit was made for climbing.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:43pm Sebastian:

deathrace!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:43pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Motorcycle race!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:43pm Just Ted:

Its the fast and the furious
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:44pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

This has everything, I love it
     Wed. 4/12/17 6:44pm Listener Robert:

I can't tell which parts of dialog are IRL between Ken & Andy, and which are them in character in the telenovela. And yes, I know they're in character on 7SD too.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:44pm Just Ted:

@Michele sounds like something you would say to Frangry. Daily.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:45pm wizard frog:

I'm glad I tuned in live for this show - it'd be so hard to follow on podcast o_o
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:45pm dale:

i've been wasting my time on pbs
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:45pm Sebastian:

Rem & Michele are killing it, great voiceacting!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:45pm Lizardner Dave:

Is this me? Is this me? Is this me? Is this me? Is this me?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:46pm Just Ted:

He's Vin Deisel but he forgot to shave his head.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:46pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Smoke that cigar!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:46pm Old Dave:

Cigar smoking?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:47pm cosmic matrix:

This is amazing!!!! Do this OFTEN please.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:47pm Lizardner Dave:

Andy should have to give $20 for every time he said "Is this me" This week, you could cancel the 2018 marathon.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:47pm howard in nyc:

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. But not this time.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:48pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

"I feel nervous, confused, and strange." <- How all of us have been feeling this entire episode
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:48pm dale:

her mom is peggy buundy!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:48pm Old Dave:

I am just counting on four eyes to beat the shit out of everyone in next 10 minutes.
Please.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:49pm Lizardner Dave:

Is this me? Is this me? Is this me? Is this me? Is this me? Is this me?Is
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:49pm cosmic matrix:

Andy this could be great art, stop fucking it up!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:49pm PMD:

Andy's monologue is the best.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:49pm Just Ted:

Wait, so this is Cinderella/Fast and Furious/Romeo & Juliet/....
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:49pm howard in nyc:

All the women are wearing tight, slutty dresses. Except Four-Eyes when she is wearing her glasses.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:50pm Sebastian:

yes, poledance!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:50pm cosmic matrix:

uh oh that pole is dangerously wobbly
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:50pm wizard frog:

UH OH!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:50pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Well of course. Everybody knows glasses automatically un-sexify you.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:50pm howard in nyc:

That's a killer pole-dance
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm Sebastian:

poledance and death!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm dale:

that old dude didn't focus group well.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm Lizardner Dave:

Change the name of the show from Seven Second Delay to Is This Me?
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Damn Michele's character, you just gave that dude a heart attack
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm cosmic matrix:

hahaha why is she sticking her butt out
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm Spoiler:

Andy thinks this is a Table reading...
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm Doctor Rembrandt:

oh dear
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm dale:

wait - does four eyes become the porn star? i'm so messed up.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:51pm howard in nyc:

Cinderella. With porn stars.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:52pm Sebastian:

please do this again in the near future!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:52pm wizard frog:

Wasn't the pole dancer the porn star?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:52pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Tacos or tamales for supper tonight?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:52pm cosmic matrix:

i got here late, where did andy's part go?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:52pm dale:

from the email newsletter - how come andy's casting couch has no cushions?
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:53pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Pole Dancer = Porn Star =/= Four-Eyes
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:53pm Spoiler:

What's Up Tigre Lilly?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:53pm dale:

she has a cool hat.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:54pm Fredericks:

Poor kid suffers from entitlement disease.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:54pm Nicholas in Montclair:

He just called her a what? She's smokin'
     Wed. 4/12/17 6:54pm Listener Robert:

This was better then the hot rod movie...which they should still do the commentary for...3 times a year...the same movie each time.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:54pm Lizardner Dave:

Replay this the week before the marathon next year and we will soak the ever living fuck out of Andy
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:55pm cosmic matrix:

ohhhhh
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:55pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

She's going to make a dress out of the curtains?!?!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:55pm PMD:

Wait now it's Gone with the Wind
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:55pm wizard frog:

she's a magician!
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:55pm Nicholas in Montclair:

I'd settle for the equivalent of Jeopardy.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm dale:

the hot rod movie episode was gold. GOLD!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Sebastian:

it's fabulous that everybody is paying more attention to the video than to Andy's whining
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Rudy:

Andy on WoofMoo !
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Hey that curtain dress looks pretty good!
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Rudy:

when ?
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Old Dave:

"Nata dai kaming kwarta arog kaining tawo" is the first line from wife's mouth after watching this crap
in Sorsogon Albay. Too bad...
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:56pm Fredericks:

Not everybody
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:57pm wizard frog:

Now Andy & Ken kiss!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:57pm PMD:

Ken, it was worth it.
     Wed. 4/12/17 6:57pm Listener Robert:

if they leave the Ustream up, we can continue our own commentary.
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:57pm Nicholas in Montclair:

Thank you Andy and Ken for the hard work.
Avatar Wed. 4/12/17 6:57pm Fredericks:

What sign are you?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:58pm dale:

can we keep watching?
  Wed. 4/12/17 6:58pm Cliff (temporarily not) in Prague:

Wow, how did I make it through yet another hour....
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:58pm howard in nyc:

Oh, Ken, let it run, please?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:58pm Sebastian:

trouble in paradise
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:58pm dale:

mierda! the feed is gone.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:59pm wizard frog:

Was four eyes the one that got run over at the beginning?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 4/12/17 6:59pm howard in nyc:

Well, at least we have Egyptian Shamba
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 6:59pm Sebastian:

damn!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 4/12/17 7:06pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Know what was missing from this? Aaron from Minneapolis! Gah!
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