Options Seven Second Delay with Ken and Andy: Playlist from May 27, 2015 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options May 27, 2015: Andy's New Career as Call Screener

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Artist Track Approx. start time
Ken and Nick the Bard  Seven Second Delay   Options 0:00:00 ()

Listener comments!

Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:02pm Marcel M:

Now this I gotta see...
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:02pm Listener Robert:

I hope we're encouraged to harass the screener. You know, the boy.
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:03pm Listener Robert:

Any letters to Andy Breckman, Madison NJ returned yet? Or acknowledged?
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:07pm groucho:

first time I've not been out on a wednesday night in a long time, Sorry, found an open mic night near me that had a very pretty girl as a regular punter. Good news is I embarrassed myself last week while very very drunk and it looks like I'll be home alone for the next however-many Wednesday nights. So good to be listening live and not on the archive, I forgot how much I loved you folk.


...god I'm so alone
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:09pm JakeGould:

@groucho: “…regular punter.” That’s the way to charm the ladies.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:10pm Lizardner Dave:

Anyone curious as to what Andy's ABC show is? Not finding anything via google.
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:10pm Listener Robert:

Run out of show tunes, Andy?
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:10pm Marcel M:

Hahaha.
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:10pm Marcel M:

I'm thinking.. haha
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:11pm Marcel M:

If its as good as Monk I'm only slightly curious
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:12pm Chris M.:

where do i send Andy my portfolio of jokes? it's only half a page long but i have a lot of copies printed out.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:12pm Carmichael:

Are you Smarter than Andy? Hosted by Jeff Foxworthy.
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:13pm JakeGould:

@ChrisM: I heard comedians just compile all of those “101 [thing] Jokes” books and then shuffle the cards and then the comedy happens.
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:13pm Marcel M:

Oh no now all the monkey men at WNYC are gonna hear the secrets!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:14pm PMD:

Poor Nick... Or poor us?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:14pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"Win Andy Breckman's Money" ... well, that's already been done.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:14pm chris:

fatal flaw: Andy untrainable?
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:14pm Marcel M:

@PMD: I guess that could be the question every week, no?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:15pm PMD:

@Marcel, yes, actually
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:15pm People Like Us:

this is perfect
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:16pm redkayak:

If I call will I win a magnet?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:17pm steve:

haha nick berating andy in the background
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:17pm gülşah:

what are you doing ?
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:18pm Marcel M:

Yes, Redkayak, A CUSTOM MAGNETTTT!!!!!
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:18pm People Like Us:

only on WFMU
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:19pm Santos L Halper:

The new sched looks great Ken. So glad to see you on there Vicki!
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:19pm Marcel M:

Black phone death, silver phone suffering.
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:19pm groucho:

@JakeGould here in England that's an affectionate term
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:20pm People Like Us:

thanks Santos :)
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:20pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

The sad thing is Seven Second Delay and Jim Price swapped slots
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:21pm Listener Robert:

That's OK, Aaron, it still leaves 53 secs.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:22pm Lizardner Dave:

I'm excited to hear the one minute version of SSD and a full hour of Jim Price.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:22pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

The sad thing is Seven Second Delay and Jim Price swapped slots
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:22pm Veronica:

Andy's trying to co-host, don't let him!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:22pm steve:

so if the black phone is death... why have the black phone?
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:23pm JakeGould:

Bring back toaster pizza. https://m.facebook.com/pages/Please-bring-back-Buitonis-Instant-Pizza/104408919646128
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:24pm redkayak:

How about old school Jarts - with the metal tips?
Wonder how many ER visits those things caused?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:24pm redkayak:

@jake Yeah, good one
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:25pm cobradan:

Sugar Pops
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:25pm PMD:

oops,weebles do still exist. they just aren't the same
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:25pm Veronica:

Nick yelling at Andy is like the best thing ever.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:25pm Veronica:

Shrinky Dinks
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:26pm PMD:

@Veronica - yes!
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:26pm Listener Robert:

PMD, you mean now they DO fall down?
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:26pm groucho:

There's gonna be new P.L.U.?!?!?!?! I haven't read the new schedule yet. Amazing! Your podcast got me in to WFMU Vicki, thankyou very very much x
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:26pm steve:

i was gonna call about Giant Chewy Sweet Tarts, but apparently theyre still around. nice.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:27pm PMD:

@Listener Robert. Yes, and they have stickers now.. stupid
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:27pm People Like Us:

New WFMU Schedule: wfmu.org...
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:27pm JakeGould:

Dammit. Toaster pizza. I want that back.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:28pm PMD:

@JakeGould - you could make English muffin pizzas in the toaster
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:28pm Veronica:

@steve WHERE CAN I GET THE GIANT CHEWY SWEETTARTS. I seriously thought of those in response to this question.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:28pm Nick the Bard:

But Shrinky Dinks are still around
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:29pm Veronica:

Thanks Nick the Bard for the Shrinky Dink tips! Keep yelling at Andy!
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:30pm Listener Robert:

I don't sincerely want to go on the air, because I have laryngitis. That often happens to me in the last stage of a cold, which is now. But I can still harass.
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:30pm Danne D:

Whoa this new schedule!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:31pm Andrew Waterloo:

I've been studying that new schedule
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:31pm steve:

haha nice Veronica! i used to ride my bike to the Walkwick NJ Walgreens to get em and just shove em into my mouth and just bask in their chewy glory.

haven't seen a pack in forever but i just googled and looks like they're still around. you can get a full drugstore size box for $25!
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:31pm P-90:

Anyone else remember the "Marble Raceway" game?
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:32pm Danne D:

I still think even with a one-minute show that Andy will have a reasonable chance to lose his will to live each week.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:32pm PMD:

Dong Sun not want leave Andy, he says
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:32pm cobradan:

www.youtube.com...
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:33pm Veronica:

Someone has to rein in this new call screener whatsisname
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:33pm JakeGould:

@PMD: I am talking about vertical toasters. Check my link. It's like a hot pocket for a toaster.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:33pm ?:

This show really sucks
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:33pm common:

i'd like micronauts to make a comeback.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:34pm Veronica:

How about the boy's doll, My Buddy
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:34pm MikeY:

It dosent suck its just plain bad
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:34pm Julie:

The Kinks? Who are they?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:35pm Nick the Bard:

Micronauts had a come back back around 2000 or so, but the plastic quality was kind of crap (they also had a much bigger revival in Japan with kind of better quality)
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:35pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Andy is the ultimate troll
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:35pm steve:

is astronaut ice cream still around? i feel like that was a consistent presence in my childhood.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:35pm JakeGould:

@common: Wow! You remember Micronauts? I have a nice sized Microman collection does't take up much space. Those are the toys that inspired the Micronauts.
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:35pm Marcel M:

Oh no.. hahahah
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:36pm Marcel M:

This poor guy jhahah
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:36pm Nick the Bard:

Now do you guys see why I get so cranky call screening? >;P
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:36pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Billy Jam scores a 3-hour slot. I see.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:37pm JakeGould:

@Nick: Yup. The Japanese Microman reissues got me back into childhood nostalgia. The original Microman figures were better quality than even old school Micronauts.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:37pm PMD:

"I like silence"
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:38pm Marcel M:

A shirt from a different station ha ha ha
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:38pm Marcel M:

that was wonderful
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:41pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

This will be hard to do in one minute
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:41pm Ken From Hyde Park:

They should bring back Matchbox cars made in England.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:42pm cklequ:

Ha!

And i thought this show was going to be a trainwreck.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:42pm JakeGould:

Yeah but now Mattel owns Matchbox and it's just a brand.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:42pm steve:

does 7 Eleven still have candy straws? i haven't had a Slurpee in years.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:42pm hambox:

just when you think andy can't be any more freaking annoying...
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:42pm PMD:

Nick - you should try tellimng callers what to say too.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:43pm PMD:

@JakeGould - you can buy something similar for $1,500
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:44pm JakeGould:

Who is this jabroni call screener? They get him from a Home Depot parking lot?
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:44pm JakeGould:

What costs $1,500?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:45pm PMD:

vertical toaster
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:46pm JakeGould:

A vertical toaster is a normal slice toaster that costs like $10.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:47pm JakeGould:

What will Jim Price do with an extra 59 minutes.
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:47pm Danne D:

This show has been a big boost to my confidence as temporary call screener for Dave Hill.
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 6:48pm Danne D:

@Jake - maybe it'll be 59 replays of the first minute?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:48pm steve:

Andy is truly a master in the art of trolling
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:49pm JakeGould:

Andy has issues.
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:49pm Carmichael:

Bring back the Water Wiggle. Stick it on the end of a hose and watch it kill people.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:50pm Veronica:

What the hell is a Winky Dink?
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:50pm PMD:

Andy is actually learning!
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:50pm Veronica:

@Carmichael sounds like Happy Fun Ball
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:50pm Listener Robert:

I once (maybe twice) tried to cook broiler pizza in the toaster. Because there was no surrounding crust, that really gunked up the toaster.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:51pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Possible marathon premium: Andy is you personal call screener for an afternoon.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:51pm JakeGould:

That is why real toaster pizza is better!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:52pm Aaron in Minneapolis:

Oh Andy is just trying to steer this thing into Dead Air Gulch
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:52pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Toaster-sized Hot Pockets...is that available to buy?
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:52pm Old Dave:

Go, Nick! Best show in years.
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:52pm Listener Robert:

Of course sometimes the toaster pizzas would leak & gunk up the toaster anyway.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:53pm P-90:

the almond is NOT the only difference, Almond Joys and Mounds have different kinds of chocolate
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:53pm PMD:

I miss Schoolhouse Rock!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:53pm Mike East:

I need a toaster. I have to use the oven or a skillet if I want some toast. and that's just not the same
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:54pm Listener Robert:

Yeah, and since when is coconut not nuts?
     Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm Listener Robert:

Sanforized Shrinky Dinks?
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm Mike East:

my 10 year old watches Full House. She is impressed that I have seen every episode. A fact that I used to be ashamed of.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm JakeGould:

Almond Joy is milk chocolate with almonds. Mounds is dark chocolate with no nuts.
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm steve:

Nick should do some kinda 1 hour pop culture talk show
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm Nellie:

I just got them too!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm PMD:

THAT's the best line. "Caller, don't argue with the Hulk"
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:55pm Old Dave:

Nick is correct.
Avatar Wed. 5/27/15 6:56pm Marcel M:

www.amazon.com...
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:56pm Nick the Bard:

Norflax Oxdun Sidetower is kind of a 3 hour pop culture talk show :P
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:56pm Veronica:

Yeah Nick you should have a pop culture talk show!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member    Wed. 5/27/15 6:56pm Ken From Hyde Park:

One time at work, a guy was complaining about some person who was putting buttered bagels into the break room toaster and gunking it all up. A week later, I goaded the complainer by telling him my great new invention was frozen toasted cheese sandwiches that you'd heat up in the toaster.
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:57pm Veronica:

Ohhhh whoops late on that comment :/
  Wed. 5/27/15 6:59pm JakeGould:

Yes! I got on the air to clarify Mounds versus Almond Joy!
Avatar Swag For Life Member Wed. 5/27/15 7:00pm Mike East:

they could increase their shelf space by making dark chocolate almond joys and milk chocolate mounds.
     Wed. 5/27/15 7:01pm Listener Robert:

The candy world can now rest safely.

I was the one asking for Carlo.
Avatar    Wed. 5/27/15 9:01pm Listener Julian:

Tell us about the shape of the truck!
  Wed. 5/27/15 9:15pm Art:

Great one this week! Going out strong.
Avatar    Thu. 5/28/15 5:29am People Like Us:

Best radio ever.
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