|View Pat Byrne's profile|
DJ Disk Jockey, AKA Pat Byrne, does what he does best: acts weird, plays good music, and repeats... repeats... repeats... repeats. Your 3-hour passport to insomnia.
<-- Previous playlist | Back to Redundancy Radio with DJ Disk Jockey playlists | Next playlist -->
April 30, 2014: Episode: 42 - I lived in a building once with a super named Mario. NO FOOLIN' !!!
Listen to this show: | Add or read comments
|Artist||Track||Album||Label||New||Approx. start time|
|Jonathon Richman||Not So Much To Be Loved As To Love||0:00:00 ()|
|The Everly Brothers||Lightning Express||0:03:23 ()|
|Neil Young||Reason To Believe||0:07:56 ()|
|B. B. King||The Wrong Way||0:10:43 ()|
|The Shangri Lips||Don't Know Why||0:14:34 ()|
|Todayshits||If Ya Wanna||0:19:16 ()|
|Brett Smiley||Va Va Voom||Va Va Voom 7"||Sing Sing||0:19:29 ()|
|Maniac||Pepe||DIm Sum 7"||La-Ti-Da||*||0:22:18 ()|
|Fa Bonx||The Rinda||Jilto Boy 7"||What's Yr Rupture?||0:24:50 ()|
|Last Stand||Scum Guns||0:27:16 ()|
|The Sensational Second Cousins||Why Do We Do?||Cruel Baby 7"||Kuriosa||*||0:29:40 ()|
|Nox Boys||Novelty||Nox Boys||Get Hip||*||0:31:53 ()|
|Tweens||Star Studder||Tweens||French Kiss||*||0:34:20 ()|
|DEATH||Restlessness||III||Drag City||*||0:37:53 ()|
|Digger and the Pussycats||Sofia||Slovenly 7"||Slovenly||0:41:50 ()|
|Lemonheads||Glad I Don't Know||0:45:33 ()|
|Marvin Berry & the New Sound||Know Your Role||Bootleg||New Sound Sounds||*||0:47:13 ()|
|Jon Spencer Blues Explosion||She's On It/Jack the Ripper||0:49:30 ()|
|Scupper||Scene Of The Crime||7"||*||0:52:39 ()|
|Totally Radd!!||California (Phantom Planet)||M.u.s.c.l.e. 7"||Bad Idea Graveyard||0:55:15 ()|
|Shane Vidaurri||Redundancy Radio Theme!||0:57:21 ()|
|Justin Strauss & Bryan Mette||Body And Soul||What?! William Onyeabor Remixed||Luka Bop||*||1:21:51 ()|
|Sonny Knight and The Lakers||Sugarman||Hey Girl 7"||Secret Stash||*||1:29:12 ()|
|The Kingstonians||Singer Man||Tighten Up Vol. 3||1:32:46 ()|
|Jimmy Cliff||A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall||Sacred Fire EP||Collective Sounds||1:35:58 ()|
|Desmond Dekker||Where Did It Go? (The Song We Used To Sing)||First Time For A Long Time||1:41:30 ()|
|The English Beat||Hands Off... She's Mine||I just Can't Stop||I.R.S.||1:45:03 ()|
|The Latin Souls||Que Va||Boogaloo & Shingaling||Kapp||1:47:42 ()|
|Earth, Wind and Fire||Shining Star||That's The Way of the World||Colombia||1:53:34 ()|
|The Si-Berians||This is the Ending of Our Love||South Side Story Vol 23||Numebro||*||1:57:17 ()|
|Sonny and the Sunsets||Home In Exile||Hit after Hit||Fat Possum||2:09:20 ()|
|Medicine||The Pink||In Session||Captured Tracks||*||2:11:25 ()|
|Batman and Robin||My Hero-Power is my Mustache||7"||2:16:39 ()|
|Friends Of Cesar Romero||Red Headed Stragler||Red Headed Strangler 7"||Snappy Little Numbers||*||2:19:40 ()|
|The Croissants||2 Killer||2:21:08 ()|
|Lenz||Frozen Touch||Frozen Touch 7"||Volar||*||2:22:09 ()|
|Morgan Delt||Beneath the Black and Purple||Morgan Delt||Trouble in Mind||*||2:25:12 ()|
|The Proclaimers||What Do You Do||Sunshine On Leith||Chrysalis||2:28:58 ()|
|Long Ranger||Dub is the Answer||2:32:25 ()|
|The Apostles||Soulful||2:35:39 ()|
|Soraia Drummond||Eu Acho E Pouco||Brazilian Bass:Inner City Tropical Soundblast||Farout||*||2:38:39 ()|
|King Tubby||Heartless Dub||2:40:16 ()|
Wed. 4/30/14 3:40am
Wed. 4/30/14 3:42am
Wed. 4/30/14 3:43am
Ah I knew it was Death!
Wed. 4/30/14 3:44am
Wed. 4/30/14 3:46am
Gotta get it. Morning DJDJ.
Wed. 4/30/14 3:50am
Good morning Pat and guten TZAG everyone.
I saw Gnaw yesterday, the drummer was wearing a Brian Turner T-shirt
Wed. 4/30/14 4:23am
*thumbs up* :)
Wed. 4/30/14 4:24am
dude.. you're all i got at the mo and i dont feel alone so dont you either. k?
Wed. 4/30/14 4:25am
Wed. 4/30/14 4:25am
Thanks Ratty and Inked. Yous my homeies.
Wed. 4/30/14 4:33am
if we gonna be homies we gonna need handshakes n shit.. not sure we ready for this. i am more of a if you cant be with the one you love love the one you're with typa guy.
Wed. 4/30/14 4:35am
Eventually, we all gotta settle. Good point.
Wed. 4/30/14 4:40am
annoyed to have missed the first half of the show. Looks good though. :)
Wed. 4/30/14 4:44am
slowly building a musical pyramid!
Wed. 4/30/14 5:07am
8.. coffee's wearing off...I'm drifting
Wed. 4/30/14 5:07am
3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 117450284102701938521105559644622948954930381964428810975665933446128475648233 786783165271201909145648566923460348610454326648213393607260249141273724587006 606315588174881520920962829254091715364367892590360011330530548820466521384146 951941511609433057270365759591953092186117381932611793105118548074462379962749 567351885752724891227938183011949129833673362440656643086021394946395224737190 702179860943702770539217176293176752384674818467669405132000568127145263560827 785771342757789609173637178721468440901224953430146549585371050792279689258923 542019956112129021960864034418159813629774771309960518707211349999998372978049 951059731732816096318595024459455346908302642522308253344685035261931188171010 003137838752886587533208381420617177669147303598253490428755468731159562863882 353787593751957781857780532171226806613001927876611195909216420198938095257201 065485863278865936153381827968230301952035301852968995773622599413891249721775 283479131515574857242454150695950829533116861727855889075098381754637464939319 255060400927701671139009848824012858361603563707660104710181942955596198946767 837449448255379774726847104047534646208046684259069491293313677028989152104752 162056966024058038150193511253382430035587640247496473263914199272604269922796 782354781636009341721641219924586315030286182974555706749838505494588586926995 690927210797509302955321165344987202755960236480665499119881834797753566369807 426542527862551818417574672890977772793800081647060016145249192173217214772350 141441973568548161361157352552133475741849468438523323907394143334547762416862 518983569485562099219222184272550254256887671790494601653466804988627232791786 085784383827967976681454100953883786360950680064225125205117392984896084128488 626945604241965285022210661186306744278622039194945047123713786960956364371917 287467764657573962413890865832645995813390478027590099465764078951269468398352 595709825822620522489407726719478268482601476990902640136394437455305068203496 252451749399651431429809190659250937221696461515709858387410597885959772975498 930161753928468138268683868942774155991855925245953959431049972524680845987273 644695848653836736222626099124608051243884390451244136549762780797715691435997 700129616089441694868555848406353422072225828488648158456028506016842739452267 467678895252138522549954666727823986456596116354886230577456498035593634568174 324112515076069479451096596094025228879710893145669136867228748940560101503308 617928680920874760917824938589009714909675985261365549781893129784821682998948 722658804857564014270477555132379641451523746234364542858444795265867821051141 354735739523113427166102135969536231442952484937187110145765403590279934403742 007310578539062198387447808478489683321445713868751943506430218453191048481005 370614680674919278191197939952061419663428754440643745123718192179998391015919 561814675142691239748940907186494231961567945208095146550225231603881930142093 762137855956638937787083039069792077346722182562599661501421503068038447734549 202605414665925201497442850732518666002132434088190710486331734649651453905796 268561005508106658796998163574736384052571459102897064140110971206280439039759 515677157700420337869936007230558763176359421873125147120532928191826186125867 321579198414848829164470609575270695722091756711672291098169091528017350671274 858322287183520935396572512108357915136988209144421006751033467110314126711136 990865851639831501970165151168517143765761835155650884909989859982387345528331 635507647918535893226185489632132933089857064204675259070915481416549859461637 180270981994309924488957571282890592323326097299712084433573265489382391193259 746366730583604142813883032038249037589852437441702913276561809377344403070746 921120191302033038019762110110044929321516084244485963766983895228684783123552 658213144957685726243344189303968642624341077322697802807318915441101044682325 271620105265227211166039666557309254711055785376346682065310989652691862056476 931257058635662018558100729360659876486117910453348850346113657686753249441668 039626579787718556084552965412665408530614344431858676975145661406800700237877 659134401712749470420562230538994561314071127000407854733269939081454664645880 797270826683063432858785698305235808933065757406795457163775254202114955761581 400250126228594130216471550979259230990796547376125517656751357517829666454779 174501129961489030463994713296210734043751895735961458901938971311179042978285 647503203198691514028708085990480109412147221317947647772622414254854540332157 185306142288137585043063321751829798662237172159160771669254748738986654949450 114654062843366393790039769265672146385306736096571209180763832716641627488880 078692560290228472104031721186082041900042296617119637792133757511495950156604 963186294726547364252308177036751590673502350728354056704038674351362222477158 915049530984448933309634087807693259939780541934144737744184263129860809988868 741326047215695162396586457302163159819319516735381297416772947867242292465436 680098067692823828068996400482435403701416314965897940924323789690706977942236 250822168895738379862300159377647165122893578601588161755782973523344604281512 627203734314653197777416031990665541876397929334419521541341899485444734567383 162499341913181480927777103863877343177207545654532207770921201905166096280490 926360197598828161332316663652861932668633606273567630354477628035045077723554 710585954870279081435624014517180624643626794561275318134078330336254232783944 975382437205835311477119926063813346776879695970309833913077109870408591337464 144282277263465947047458784778720192771528073176790770715721344473060570073349 243693113835049316312840425121925651798069411352801314701304781643788518529092 854520116583934196562134914341595625865865570552690496520985803385072242648293 972858478316305777756068887644624824685792603953527734803048029005876075825104 747091643961362676044925627420420832085661190625454337213153595845068772460290 161876679524061634252257719542916299193064553779914037340432875262888963995879 475729174642635745525407909145135711136941091193932519107602082520261879853188 770584297259167781314969900901921169717372784768472686084900337702424291651300 500516832336435038951702989392233451722013812806965011784408745196012122859937 162313017114448464090389064495444006198690754851602632750529834918740786680881 833851022833450850486082503930213321971551843063545500766828294930413776552793 975175461395398468339363830474611996653858153842056853386218672523340283087112 328278921250771262946322956398989893582116745627010218356462201349671518819097 303811980049734072396103685406643193950979019069963955245300545058068550195673 022921913933918568034490398205955100226353536192041994745538593810234395544959 778377902374216172711172364343543947822181852862408514006660443325888569867054 315470696574745855033232334210730154594051655379068662733379958511562578432298 827372319898757141595781119635833005940873068121602876496286744604774649159950 549737425626901049037781986835938146574126804925648798556145372347867330390468 838343634655379498641927056387293174872332083760112302991136793862708943879936 201629515413371424892830722012690147546684765357616477379467520049075715552781 965362132392640616013635815590742202020318727760527721900556148425551879253034 351398442532234157623361064250639049750086562710953591946589751413103482276930 624743536325691607815478181152843667957061108615331504452127473924544945423682 886061340841486377670096120715124914043027253860764823634143346235189757664521 641376796903149501910857598442391986291642193994907236234646844117394032659184 044378051333894525742399508296591228508555821572503107125701266830240292952522 011872676756220415420516184163484756516999811614101002996078386909291603028840 026910414079288621507842451670908700069928212066041837180653556725253256753286 129104248776182582976515795984703562226293486003415872298053498965022629174878 820273420922224533985626476691490556284250391275771028402799806636582548892648 802545661017296702664076559042909945681506526530537182941270336931378517860904 070866711496558343434769338578171138645587367812301458768712660348913909562009 939361031029161615288138437909904231747336394804575931493140529763475748119356 709110137751721008031559024853090669203767192203322909433467685142214477379393 751703443661991040337511173547191855046449026365512816228824462575916333039107 225383742182140883508657391771509682887478265699599574490661758344137522397096 834080053559849175417381883999446974867626551658276584835884531427756879002909 517028352971634456212964043523117600665101241200659755851276178583829204197484 423608007193045761893234922927965019875187212726750798125547095890455635792122 103334669749923563025494780249011419521238281530911407907386025152274299581807 247162591668545133312394804947079119153267343028244186041426363954800044800267 049624820179289647669758318327131425170296923488962766844032326092752496035799 646925650493681836090032380929345958897069536534940603402166544375589004563288 225054525564056448246515187547119621844396582533754388569094113031509526179378 002974120766514793942590298969594699556576121865619673378623625612521632086286 922210327488921865436480229678070576561514463204692790682120738837781423356282 360896320806822246801224826117718589638140918390367367222088832151375560037279 839400415297002878307667094447456013455641725437090697939612257142989467154357 846878861444581231459357198492252847160504922124247014121478057345510500801908 699603302763478708108175450119307141223390866393833952942578690507643100638351 983438934159613185434754649556978103829309716465143840700707360411237359984345 225161050702705623526601276484830840761183013052793205427462865403603674532865 105706587488225698157936789766974220575059683440869735020141020672358502007245 225632651341055924019027421624843914035998953539459094407046912091409387001264 560016237428802109276457931065792295524988727584610126483699989225695968815920 560010165525637567856672279661988578279484885583439751874454551296563443480396 642055798293680435220277098429423253302257634180703947699415979159453006975214 829336655566156787364005366656416547321704390352132954352916941459904160875320 186837937023488868947915107163785290234529244077365949563051007421087142613497 459561513849871375704710178795731042296906667021449863746459528082436944578977 233004876476524133907592043401963403911473202338071509522201068256342747164602 433544005152126693249341967397704159568375355516673027390074972973635496453328 886984406119649616277344951827369558822075735517665158985519098666539354948106 887320685990754079234240230092590070173196036225475647894064754834664776041146 323390565134330684495397907090302346046147096169688688501408347040546074295869 913829668246818571031887906528703665083243197440477185567893482308943106828702 722809736248093996270607472645539925399442808113736943388729406307926159599546 262462970706259484556903471197299640908941805953439325123623550813494900436427 852713831591256898929519642728757394691427253436694153236100453730488198551706 594121735246258954873016760029886592578662856124966552353382942878542534048308 330701653722856355915253478445981831341129001999205981352205117336585640782648 494276441137639386692480311836445369858917544264739988228462184490087776977631 279572267265556259628254276531830013407092233436577916012809317940171859859993 384923549564005709955856113498025249906698423301735035804408116855265311709957 089942732870925848789443646005041089226691783525870785951298344172953519537885 534573742608590290817651557803905946408735061232261120093731080485485263572282 576820341605048466277504500312620080079980492548534694146977516493270950493463 938243222718851597405470214828971117779237612257887347718819682546298126868581 705074027255026332904497627789442362167411918626943965067151577958675648239939 176042601763387045499017614364120469218237076488783419689686118155815873606293 860381017121585527266830082383404656475880405138080163363887421637140643549556 186896411228214075330265510042410489678352858829024367090488711819090949453314 421828766181031007354770549815968077200947469613436092861484941785017180779306 810854690009445899527942439813921350558642219648349151263901280383200109773868 066287792397180146134324457264009737425700735921003154150893679300816998053652 027600727749674584002836240534603726341655425902760183484030681138185510597970 566400750942608788573579603732451414678670368809880609716425849759513806930944 940151542222194329130217391253835591503100333032511174915696917450271494331515 588540392216409722910112903552181576282328318234254832611191280092825256190205 263016391147724733148573910777587442538761174657867116941477642144111126358355 387136101102326798775641024682403226483464176636980663785768134920453022408197 278564719839630878154322116691224641591177673225326433568614618654522268126887 268445968442416107854016768142080885028005414361314623082102594173756238994207 571362751674573189189456283525704413354375857534269869947254703165661399199968 262824727064133622217892390317608542894373393561889165125042440400895271983787 386480584726895462438823437517885201439560057104811949884239060613695734231559 079670346149143447886360410318235073650277859089757827273130504889398900992391 350337325085598265586708924261242947367019390772713070686917092646254842324074 855036608013604668951184009366860954632500214585293095000090715105823626729326 453738210493872499669933942468551648326113414611068026744663733437534076429402 668297386522093570162638464852851490362932019919968828517183953669134522244470 804592396602817156551565666111359823112250628905854914509715755390024393153519 090210711945730024388017661503527086260253788179751947806101371500448991721002 220133501310601639154158957803711779277522597874289191791552241718958536168059 474123419339842021874564925644346239253195313510331147639491199507285843065836 193536932969928983791494193940608572486396883690326556436421664425760791471086 998431573374964883529276932822076294728238153740996154559879825989109371712621 828302584811238901196822142945766758071865380650648702613389282299497257453033 283896381843944770779402284359883410035838542389735424395647555684095224844554 139239410001620769363684677641301781965937997155746854194633489374843912974239 143365936041003523437770658886778113949861647874714079326385873862473288964564 359877466763847946650407411182565837887845485814896296127399841344272608606187 245545236064315371011274680977870446409475828034876975894832824123929296058294 861919667091895808983320121031843034012849511620353428014412761728583024355983 003204202451207287253558119584014918096925339507577840006746552603144616705082 768277222353419110263416315714740612385042584598841990761128725805911393568960 143166828317632356732541707342081733223046298799280490851409479036887868789493 054695570307261900950207643349335910602454508645362893545686295853131533718386 826561786227363716975774183023986006591481616404944965011732131389574706208847 480236537103115089842799275442685327797431139514357417221975979935968525228574 526379628961269157235798662057340837576687388426640599099350500081337543245463 596750484423528487470144354541957625847356421619813407346854111766883118654489 377697956651727966232671481033864391375186594673002443450054499539974237232871 249483470604406347160632583064982979551010954183623503030945309733583446283947 630477564501500850757894954893139394489921612552559770143685894358587752637962 559708167764380012543650237141278346792610199558522471722017772370041780841942 394872540680155603599839054898572354674564239058585021671903139526294455439131 663134530893906204678438778505423939052473136201294769187497519101147231528932 677253391814660730008902776896311481090220972452075916729700785058071718638105 496797310016787085069420709223290807038326345345203802786099055690013413718236 837099194951648960075504934126787643674638490206396401976668559233565463913836 318574569814719621084108096188460545603903845534372914144651347494078488442377 217515433426030669883176833100113310869042193903108014378433415137092435301367 763108491351615642269847507430329716746964066653152703532546711266752246055119 958183196376370761799191920357958200759560530234626775794393630746305690108011 494271410093913691381072581378135789400559950018354251184172136055727522103526 803735726527922417373605751127887218190844900617801388971077082293100279766593 583875890939568814856026322439372656247277603789081445883785501970284377936240 782505270487581647032458129087839523245323789602984166922548964971560698119218 658492677040395648127810217991321741630581055459880130048456299765112124153637 451500563507012781592671424134210330156616535602473380784302865525722275304999 883701534879300806260180962381516136690334111138653851091936739383522934588832 255088706450753947395204396807906708680644509698654880168287434378612645381583 428075306184548590379821799459968115441974253634439960290251001588827216474500 682070419376158454712318346007262933955054823955713725684023226821301247679452 264482091023564775272308208106351889915269288910845557112660396503439789627825 001611015323516051965590421184494990778999200732947690586857787872098290135295 661397888486050978608595701773129815531495168146717695976099421003618355913877 781769845875810446628399880600616229848616935337386578773598336161338413385368 421197893890018529569196780455448285848370117096721253533875862158231013310387 766827211572694951817958975469399264219791552338576623167627547570354699414892 904130186386119439196283887054367774322427680913236544948536676800000106526248 547305586159899914017076983854831887501429389089950685453076511680333732226517 566220752695179144225280816517166776672793035485154204023817460892328391703275 425750867655117859395002793389592057668278967764453184040418554010435134838953 120132637836928358082719378312654961745997056745071833206503455664403449045362 756001125018433560736122276594927839370647842645676338818807565612168960504161 139039063960162022153684941092605387688714837989559999112099164646441191856827 700457424343402167227644558933012778158686952506949936461017568506016714535431 581480105458860564550133203758645485840324029871709348091055621167154684847780 394475697980426318099175642280987399876697323769573701580806822904599212366168 902596273043067931653114940176473769387351409336183321614280214976339918983548 487562529875242387307755955595546519639440182184099841248982623673771467226061 633643296406335728107078875816404381485018841143188598827694490119321296827158 884133869434682859006664080631407775772570563072940049294030242049841656547973 670548558044586572022763784046682337985282710578431975354179501134727362577408 021347682604502285157979579764746702284099956160156910890384582450267926594205 550395879229818526480070683765041836562094555434613513415257006597488191634135 955671964965403218727160264859304903978748958906612725079482827693895352175362 185079629778514618843271922322381015874445052866523802253284389137527384589238 442253547265309817157844783421582232702069028723233005386216347988509469547200 479523112015043293226628272763217790884008786148022147537657810581970222630971 749507212724847947816957296142365859578209083073323356034846531873029302665964 501371837542889755797144992465403868179921389346924474198509733462679332107268 687076806263991936196504409954216762784091466985692571507431574079380532392523 947755744159184582156251819215523370960748332923492103451462643744980559610330 799414534778457469999212859999939961228161521931488876938802228108300198601654 941654261696858678837260958774567618250727599295089318052187292461086763995891 614585505839727420980909781729323930106766386824040111304024700735085782872462 713494636853181546969046696869392547251941399291465242385776255004748529547681 479546700705034799958886769501612497228204030399546327883069597624936151010243 655535223069061294938859901573466102371223547891129254769617600504797492806072 126803922691102777226102544149221576504508120677173571202718024296810620377657 883716690910941807448781404907551782038565390991047759414132154328440625030180 275716965082096427348414695726397884256008453121406593580904127113592004197598 513625479616063228873618136737324450607924411763997597461938358457491598809766 744709300654634242346063423747466608043170126005205592849369594143408146852981 505394717890045183575515412522359059068726487863575254191128887737176637486027 660634960353679470269232297186832771739323619200777452212624751869833495151019 864269887847171939664976907082521742336566272592844062043021411371992278526998 469884770232382384005565551788908766136013047709843861168705231055314916251728 373272867600724817298763756981633541507460883866364069347043720668865127568826 614973078865701568501691864748854167915459650723428773069985371390430026653078 398776385032381821553559732353068604301067576083890862704984188859513809103042 359578249514398859011318583584066747237029714978508414585308578133915627076035 639076394731145549583226694570249413983163433237897595568085683629725386791327 505554252449194358912840504522695381217913191451350099384631177401797151228378 546011603595540286440590249646693070776905548102885020808580087811577381719174 177601733073855475800605601433774329901272867725304318251975791679296996504146 070664571258883469797964293162296552016879730003564630457930884032748077181155 533090988702550520768046303460865816539487695196004408482065967379473168086415 645650530049881616490578831154345485052660069823093157776500378070466126470602 145750579327096204782561524714591896522360839664562410519551052235723973951288 181640597859142791481654263289200428160913693777372229998332708208296995573772 737566761552711392258805520189887620114168005468736558063347160373429170390798 639652296131280178267971728982293607028806908776866059325274637840539769184808 204102194471971386925608416245112398062011318454124478205011079876071715568315 407886543904121087303240201068534194723047666672174986986854707678120512473679 247919315085644477537985379973223445612278584329684664751333657369238720146472 367942787004250325558992688434959287612400755875694641370562514001179713316620 715371543600687647731867558714878398908107429530941060596944315847753970094398 839491443235366853920994687964506653398573888786614762944341401049888993160051 207678103588611660202961193639682134960750111649832785635316145168457695687109 002999769841263266502347716728657378579085746646077228341540311441529418804782 543876177079043000156698677679576090996693607559496515273634981189641304331166 277471233881740603731743970540670310967676574869535878967003192586625941051053 358438465602339179674926784476370847497833365557900738419147319886271352595462 518160434225372996286326749682405806029642114638643686422472488728343417044157 348248183330164056695966886676956349141632842641497453334999948000266998758881 593507357815195889900539512085351035726137364034367534714104836017546488300407 846416745216737190483109676711344349481926268111073994825060739495073503169019 731852119552635632584339099822498624067031076831844660729124874754031617969941 139738776589986855417031884778867592902607004321266617919223520938227878880988 633599116081923535557046463491132085918979613279131975649097600013996234445535 014346426860464495862476909434704829329414041114654092398834443515913320107739 441118407410768498106634724104823935827401944935665161088463125678529776973468 430306146241803585293315973458303845541033701091676776374276210213701354854450 926307190114731848574923318167207213727935567952844392548156091372812840633303 937356242001604566455741458816605216660873874804724339121295587776390696903707 882852775389405246075849623157436917113176134783882719416860662572103685132156 647800147675231039357860689611125996028183930954870905907386135191459181951029 732787557104972901148717189718004696169777001791391961379141716270701895846921 434369676292745910994006008498356842520191559370370101104974733949387788598941 743303178534870760322198297057975119144051099423588303454635349234982688362404 332726741554030161950568065418093940998202060999414021689090070821330723089662 119775530665918814119157783627292746156185710372172471009521423696483086410259 288745799932237495519122195190342445230753513380685680735446499512720317448719 540397610730806026990625807602029273145525207807991418429063884437349968145827 337207266391767020118300464819000241308350884658415214899127610651374153943565 721139032857491876909441370209051703148777346165287984823533829726013611098451 484182380812054099612527458088109948697221612852489742555551607637167505489617 301680961380381191436114399210638005083214098760459930932485102516829446726066 613815174571255975495358023998314698220361338082849935670557552471290274539776 214049318201465800802156653606776550878380430413431059180460680083459113664083 488740800574127258670479225831912741573908091438313845642415094084913391809684 025116399193685322555733896695374902662092326131885589158083245557194845387562 878612885900410600607374650140262782402734696252821717494158233174923968353013 617865367376064216677813773995100658952887742766263684183068019080460984980946 976366733566228291513235278880615776827815958866918023894033307644191240341202 231636857786035727694154177882643523813190502808701857504704631293335375728538 660588890458311145077394293520199432197117164223500564404297989208159430716701 985746927384865383343614579463417592257389858800169801475742054299580124295810 545651083104629728293758416116253256251657249807849209989799062003593650993472 158296517413579849104711166079158743698654122234834188772292944633517865385673 196255985202607294767407261676714557364981210567771689348491766077170527718760 119990814411305864557791052568430481144026193840232247093924980293355073184589 035539713308844617410795916251171486487446861124760542867343670904667846867027 409188101424971114965781772427934707021668829561087779440504843752844337510882 826477197854000650970403302186255614733211777117441335028160884035178145254196 432030957601869464908868154528562134698835544456024955666843660292219512483091 060537720198021831010327041783866544718126039719068846237085751808003532704718 565949947612424811099928867915896904956394762460842406593094862150769031498702 067353384834955083636601784877106080980426924713241000946401437360326564518456 679245666955100150229833079849607994988249706172367449361226222961790814311414 660941234159359309585407913908720832273354957208075716517187659944985693795623 875551617575438091780528029464200447215396280746360211329425591600257073562812 638733106005891065245708024474937543184149401482119996276453106800663118382376 163966318093144467129861552759820145141027560068929750246304017351489194576360 789352855505317331416457050499644389093630843874484783961684051845273288403234 520247056851646571647713932377551729479512613239822960239454857975458651745878 771331813875295980941217422730035229650808917770506825924882232215493804837145 478164721397682096332050830564792048208592047549985732038887639160199524091893 894557676874973085695595801065952650303626615975066222508406742889826590751063 756356996821151094966974458054728869363102036782325018232370845979011154847208 761821247781326633041207621658731297081123075815982124863980721240786887811450 165582513617890307086087019897588980745664395515741536319319198107057533663373 803827215279884935039748001589051942087971130805123393322190346624991716915094 854140187106035460379464337900589095772118080446574396280618671786101715674096 766208029576657705129120990794430463289294730615951043090222143937184956063405 618934251305726829146578329334052463502892917547087256484260034962961165413823 007731332729830500160256724014185152041890701154288579920812198449315699905918 201181973350012618772803681248199587707020753240636125931343859554254778196114 293516356122349666152261473539967405158499860355295332924575238881013620234762 466905581643896786309762736550472434864307121849437348530060638764456627218666 170123812771562137974614986132874411771455244470899714452288566294244023018479 120547849857452163469644897389206240194351831008828348024924908540307786387516 591130287395878709810077271827187452901397283661484214287170553179654307650453 432460053636147261818096997693348626407743519992868632383508875668359509726557 481543194019557685043724800102041374983187225967738715495839971844490727914196 584593008394263702087563539821696205532480321226749891140267852859967340524203 109179789990571882194939132075343170798002373659098537552023891164346718558290 685371189795262623449248339249634244971465684659124891855662958932990903523923 333364743520370770101084388003290759834217018554228386161721041760301164591878 053936744747205998502358289183369292233732399948043710841965947316265482574809 948250999183300697656936715968936449334886474421350084070066088359723503953234 017958255703601693699098867113210979889707051728075585519126993067309925070407 024556850778679069476612629808225163313639952117098452809263037592242674257559 989289278370474445218936320348941552104459726188380030067761793138139916205806 270165102445886924764924689192461212531027573139084047000714356136231699237169 484813255420091453041037135453296620639210547982439212517254013231490274058589 206321758949434548906846399313757091034633271415316223280552297297953801880162 859073572955416278867649827418616421878988574107164906919185116281528548679417 363890665388576422915834250067361245384916067413734017357277995634104332688356 950781493137800736235418007061918026732855119194267609122103598746924117283749 312616339500123959924050845437569850795704622266461900010350049018303415354584 283376437811198855631877779253720116671853954183598443830520376281944076159410 682071697030228515225057312609304689842343315273213136121658280807521263154773 060442377475350595228717440266638914881717308643611138906942027908814311944879 941715404210341219084709408025402393294294549387864023051292711909751353600092 197110541209668311151632870542302847007312065803262641711616595761327235156666 253667271899853419989523688483099930275741991646384142707798870887422927705389 122717248632202889842512528721782603050099451082478357290569198855546788607946 280537122704246654319214528176074148240382783582971930101788834567416781139895 475044833931468963076339665722672704339321674542182455706252479721997866854279 897799233957905758189062252547358220523642485078340711014498047872669199018643 882293230538231855973286978092225352959101734140733488476100556401824239219269 506208318381454698392366461363989101210217709597670490830508185470419466437131 229969235889538493013635657618610606222870559942337163102127845744646398973818 856674626087948201864748767272722206267646533809980196688368099415907577685263 986514625333631245053640261056960551318381317426118442018908885319635698696279 503673842431301133175330532980201668881748134298868158557781034323175306478498 321062971842518438553442762012823457071698853051832617964117857960888815032960 229070561447622091509473903594664691623539680920139457817589108893199211226007 392814916948161527384273626429809823406320024402449589445612916704950823581248 739179964864113348032475777521970893277226234948601504665268143987705161531702 669692970492831628550421289814670619533197026950721437823047687528028735412616 639170824592517001071418085480063692325946201900227808740985977192180515853214 739265325155903541020928466592529991435379182531454529059841581763705892790690 989691116438118780943537152133226144362531449012745477269573939348154691631162 492887357471882407150399500944673195431619385548520766573882513963916357672315 100555603726339486720820780865373494244011579966750736071115935133195919712094 896471755302453136477094209463569698222667377520994516845064362382421185353488 798939567318780660610788544000550827657030558744854180577889171920788142335113 866292966717964346876007704799953788338787034871802184243734211227394025571769 081960309201824018842705704609262256417837526526335832424066125331152942345796 556950250681001831090041124537901533296615697052237921032570693705109083078947 999900499939532215362274847660361367769797856738658467093667958858378879562594 646489137665219958828693380183601193236857855855819555604215625088365020332202 451376215820461810670519533065306060650105488716724537794283133887163139559690 583208341689847606560711834713621812324622725884199028614208728495687963932546 428534307530110528571382964370999035694888528519040295604734613113826387889755 178856042499874831638280404684861893818959054203988987265069762020199554841265 000539442820393012748163815853039643992547020167275932857436666164411096256633 730540921951967514832873480895747777527834422109107311135182804603634719818565 557295714474768255285786334934285842311874944000322969069775831590385803935352 135886007960034209754739229673331064939560181223781285458431760556173386112673 478074585067606304822940965304111830667108189303110887172816751957967534718853 722930961614320400638132246584111115775835858113501856904781536893813771847281 475199835050478129771859908470762197460588742325699582889253504193795826061621 184236876851141831606831586799460165205774052942305360178031335726326705479033 840125730591233960188013782542192709476733719198728738524805742124892118347087 662966720727232565056512933312605950577772754247124164831283298207236175057467 387012820957554430596839555568686118839713552208445285264008125202766555767749 596962661260456524568408613923826576858338469849977872670655519185446869846947 849573462260629421962455708537127277652309895545019303773216664918257815467729 200521266714346320963789185232321501897612603437368406719419303774688099929687 758244104787812326625318184596045385354383911449677531286426092521153767325886 672260404252349108702695809964759580579466397341906401003636190404203311357933 654242630356145700901124480089002080147805660371015412232889146572239314507607 167064355682743774396578906797268743847307634645167756210309860409271709095128 086309029738504452718289274968921210667008164858339553773591913695015316201890 888748421079870689911480466927065094076204650277252865072890532854856143316081 269300569378541786109696920253886503457718317668688592368148847527649846882194 973972970773718718840041432312763650481453112285099002074240925585925292610302 106736815434701525234878635164397623586041919412969769040526483234700991115424 260127343802208933109668636789869497799400126016422760926082349304118064382913 834735467972539926233879158299848645927173405922562074910530853153718291168163 721939518870095778818158685046450769934394098743351443162633031724774748689791 820923948083314397084067308407958935810896656477585990556376952523265361442478 023082681183103773588708924061303133647737101162821461466167940409051861526036 009252194721889091810733587196414214447865489952858234394705007983038853886083 103571930600277119455802191194289992272235345870756624692617766317885514435021 828702668561066500353105021631820601760921798468493686316129372795187307897263 735371715025637873357977180818487845886650433582437700414771041493492743845758 710715973155943942641257027096512510811554824793940359768118811728247215825010 949609662539339538092219559191818855267806214992317276316321833989693807561685 591175299845013206712939240414459386239880938124045219148483164621014738918251 010909677386906640415897361047643650006807710565671848628149637111883219244566 394581449148616550049567698269030891118568798692947051352481609174324301538368 470729289898284602223730145265567989862776796809146979837826876431159883210904 371561129976652153963546442086919756737000573876497843768628768179249746943842 746525631632300555130417422734164645512781278457777245752038654375428282567141 288583454443513256205446424101103795546419058116862305964476958705407214198521 210673433241075676757581845699069304604752277016700568454396923404171108988899 341635058515788735343081552081177207188037910404698306957868547393765643363197 978680367187307969392423632144845035477631567025539006542311792015346497792906 624150832885839529054263768766896880503331722780018588506973623240389470047189 761934734430843744375992503417880797223585913424581314404984770173236169471976 571535319775499716278566311904691260918259124989036765417697990362375528652637 573376352696934435440047306719886890196814742876779086697968852250163694985673 021752313252926537589641517147955953878427849986645630287883196209983049451987 439636907068276265748581043911223261879405994155406327013198989570376110532360 629867480377915376751158304320849872092028092975264981256916342500052290887264 692528466610466539217148208013050229805263783642695973370705392278915351056888 393811324975707133102950443034671598944878684711643832805069250776627450012200 352620370946602341464899839025258883014867816219677519458316771876275720050543 979441245990077115205154619930509838698254284640725554092740313257163264079293 418334214709041254253352324802193227707535554679587163835875018159338717423606 155117101312352563348582036514614187004920570437201826173319471570086757853933 607862273955818579758725874410254207710547536129404746010009409544495966288148 691590389907186598056361713769222729076419775517772010427649694961105622059250 242021770426962215495872645398922769766031052498085575947163107587013320886146 326641259114863388122028444069416948826152957762532501987035987067438046982194 205638125583343642194923227593722128905642094308235254408411086454536940496927 149400331978286131818618881111840825786592875742638445005994422956858646048103 301538891149948693543603022181094346676400002236255057363129462629609619876056 425996394613869233083719626595473923462413459779574852464783798079569319865081 597767535055391899115133525229873611277918274854200868953965835942196333150286 956119201229888988700607999279541118826902307891310760361763477948943203210277 335941690865007193280401716384064498787175375678118532132840821657110754952829 497493621460821558320568723218557406516109627487437509809223021160998263303391 546949464449100451528092508974507489676032409076898365294065792019831526541065 813682379198409064571246894847020935776119313998024681340520039478194986620262 400890215016616381353838151503773502296607462795291038406868556907015751662419 298724448271942933100485482445458071889763300323252582158128032746796200281476 243182862217105435289834820827345168018613171959332471107466222850871066611770 346535283957762599774467218571581612641114327179434788599089280848669491413909 771673690027775850268664654056595039486784111079011610400857274456293842549416 759460548711723594642910585090995021495879311219613590831588262068233215615308 683373083817327932819698387508708348388046388478441884003184712697454370937329 836240287519792080232187874488287284372737801782700805878241074935751488997891 173974612932035108143270325140903048746226294234432757126008664250833318768865 075642927160552528954492153765175149219636718104943531785838345386525565664065 725136357506435323650893679043170259787817719031486796384082881020946149007971 513771709906195496964007086766710233004867263147551053723175711432231741141168 062286420638890621019235522354671166213749969326932173704310598722503945657492 461697826097025335947502091383667377289443869640002811034402608471289900074680 776484408871134135250336787731679770937277868216611786534423173226463784769787 514433209534000165069213054647689098505020301504488083426184520873053097318949 291642532293361243151430657826407028389840984160295030924189712097160164926561 341343342229882790992178604267981245728534580133826099587717811310216734025656 274400729683406619848067661580502169183372368039902793160642043681207990031626 444914619021945822969099212278855394878353830564686488165556229431567312827439 082645061162894280350166133669782405177015521962652272545585073864058529983037 918035043287670380925216790757120406123759632768567484507915114731344000183257 034492090971243580944790046249431345502890068064870429353403743603262582053579 011839564908935434510134296961754524957396062149028872893279252069653538639644 322538832752249960598697475988232991626354597332444516375533437749292899058117 578635555562693742691094711700216541171821975051983178713710605106379555858890 556885288798908475091576463907469361988150781468526213325247383765119299015610 918977792200870579339646382749068069876916819749236562422608715417610043060890 437797667851966189140414492527048088197149880154205778700652159400928977760133 075684796699295543365613984773806039436889588764605498387147896848280538470173 087111776115966350503997934386933911978988710915654170913308260764740630571141 109883938809548143782847452883836807941888434266622207043872288741394780101772 139228191199236540551639589347426395382482960903690028835932774585506080131798 840716244656399794827578365019551422155133928197822698427863839167971509126241 054872570092407004548848569295044811073808799654748156891393538094347455697212 891982717702076661360248958146811913361412125878389557735719498631721084439890 142394849665925173138817160266326193106536653504147307080441493916936326237376 777709585031325599009576273195730864804246770121232702053374266705314244820816 813030639737873664248367253983748769098060218278578621651273856351329014890350 988327061725893257536399397905572917516009761545904477169226580631511102803843 601737474215247608515209901615858231257159073342173657626714239047827958728150 509563309280266845893764964977023297364131906098274063353108979246424213458374 090116939196425045912881340349881063540088759682005440836438651661788055760895 689672753153808194207733259791727843762566118431989102500749182908647514979400 316070384554946538594602745244746681231468794344161099333890899263841184742525 704457251745932573898956518571657596148126602031079762825416559050604247911401 695790033835657486925280074302562341949828646791447632277400552946090394017753 633565547193100017543004750471914489984104001586794617924161001645471655133707 407395026044276953855383439755054887109978520540117516974758134492607943368954 378322117245068734423198987884412854206474280973562580706698310697993526069339 213568588139121480735472846322778490808700246777630360555123238665629517885371 967303463470122293958160679250915321748903084088651606111901149844341235012464 692802880599613428351188471544977127847336176628506216977871774382436256571177 945006447771837022199910669502165675764404499794076503799995484500271066598781 360380231412683690578319046079276529727769404361302305178708054651154246939526 512710105292707030667302444712597393995051462840476743136373997825918454117641 332790646063658415292701903027601733947486696034869497654175242930604072700505 903950314852292139257559484507886797792525393176515641619716844352436979444735 596426063339105512682606159572621703669850647328126672452198906054988028078288 142979633669674412480598219214633956574572210229867759974673812606936706913408 155941201611596019023775352555630060624798326124988128819293734347686268921923 977783391073310658825681377717232831532908252509273304785072497713944833389255 208117560845296659055394096556854170600117985729381399825831929367910039184409 928657560599359891000296986446097471471847010153128376263114677420914557404181 590880006494323785583930853082830547607679952435739163122188605754967383224319 565065546085288120190236364471270374863442172725787950342848631294491631847534 753143504139209610879605773098720135248407505763719925365047090858251393686346 386336804289176710760211115982887553994012007601394703366179371539630613986365 549221374159790511908358829009765664730073387931467891318146510931676157582135 142486044229244530411316065270097433008849903467540551864067734260358340960860 553374736276093565885310976099423834738222208729246449768456057956251676557408 841032173134562773585605235823638953203853402484227337163912397321599544082842 166663602329654569470357718487344203422770665383738750616921276801576618109542 009770836360436111059240911788954033802142652394892968643980892611463541457153 519434285072135345301831587562827573389826889852355779929572764522939156747756 667605108788764845349363606827805056462281359888587925994094644604170520447004 631513797543173718775603981596264750141090665886616218003826698996196558058720 863972117699521946678985701179833244060181157565807428418291061519391763005919 431443460515404771057005433900018245311773371895585760360718286050635647997900 413976180895536366960316219311325022385179167205518065926351803625121457592623 836934822266589557699466049193811248660909979812857182349400661555219611220720 309227764620099931524427358948871057662389469388944649509396033045434084210246 240104872332875008174917987554387938738143989423801176270083719605309438394006 375611645856094312951759771393539607432279248922126704580818331376416581826956 210587289244774003594700926866265965142205063007859200248829186083974373235384 908396432614700053242354064704208949921025040472678105908364400746638002087012 666420945718170294675227854007450855237772089058168391844659282941701828823301 497155423523591177481862859296760504820386434310877956289292540563894662194826 871104282816389397571175778691543016505860296521745958198887868040811032843273 986719862130620555985526603640504628215230615459447448990883908199973874745296 981077620148713400012253552224669540931521311533791579802697955571050850747387 475075806876537644578252443263804614304288923593485296105826938210349800040524 840708440356116781717051281337880570564345061611933042444079826037795119854869 455915205196009304127100727784930155503889536033826192934379708187432094991415 959339636811062755729527800425486306005452383915106899891357882001941178653568 214911852820785213012551851849371150342215954224451190020739353962740020811046 553020793286725474054365271759589350071633607632161472581540764205302004534018 357233829266191530835409512022632916505442612361919705161383935732669376015691 442994494374485680977569630312958871916112929468188493633864739274760122696415 884890096571708616059814720446742866420876533479985822209061980217321161423041 947775499073873856794118982466091309169177227420723336763503267834058630193019 324299639720444517928812285447821195353089891012534297552472763573022628138209 180743974867145359077863353016082155991131414420509144729353502223081719366350 934686585865631485557586244781862010871188976065296989926932817870557643514338 206014107732926106343152533718224338526352021773544071528189813769875515757454 693972715048846979361950047772097056179391382898984532742622728864710888327017 372325881824465843624958059256033810521560620615571329915608489206434030339526 226345145428367869828807425142256745180618414956468611163540497189768215422772 247947403357152743681940989205011365340012384671429655186734415374161504256325 671343024765512521921803578016924032669954174608759240920700466934039651017813 485783569444076047023254075555776472845075182689041829396611331016013111907739 863246277821902365066037404160672496249013743321724645409741299557052914243820 807609836482346597388669134991978401310801558134397919485283043673901248208244 481412809544377389832005986490915950532285791457688496257866588599917986752055 455809900455646117875524937012455321717019428288461740273664997847550829422802 023290122163010230977215156944642790980219082668986883426307160920791408519769 523555348865774342527753119724743087304361951139611908003025587838764420608504 473063129927788894272918972716989057592524467966018970748296094919064876469370 275077386643239191904225429023531892337729316673608699622803255718530891928440 380507103006477684786324319100022392978525537237556621364474009676053943983823 576460699246526008909062410590421545392790441152958034533450025624410100635953 003959886446616959562635187806068851372346270799732723313469397145628554261546 765063246567662027924520858134771760852169134094652030767339184114750414016892 412131982688156866456148538028753933116023229255561894104299533564009578649534 093511526645402441877594931693056044868642086275720117231952640502309977456764 783848897346431721598062678767183800524769688408498918508614900343240347674268 624595239589035858213500645099817824463608731775437885967767291952611121385919 472545140030118050343787527766440276261894101757687268042817662386068047788524 288743025914524707395054652513533945959878961977891104189029294381856720507096 460626354173294464957661265195349570186001541262396228641389779673332907056737 696215649818450684226369036784955597002607986799626101903933126376855696876702 929537116252800554310078640872893922571451248113577862766490242516199027747109 033593330930494838059785662884478744146984149906712376478958226329490467981208 998485716357108783119184863025450162092980582920833481363840542172005612198935 366937133673339246441612522319694347120641737549121635700857369439730597970971 972666664226743111776217640306868131035189911227133972403688700099686292254646 500638528862039380050477827691283560337254825579391298525150682996910775425764 748832534141213280062671709400909822352965795799780301828242849022147074811112 401860761341515038756983091865278065889668236252393784527263453042041880250844 236319038331838455052236799235775292910692504326144695010986108889991465855188 187358252816430252093928525807796973762084563748211443398816271003170315133440 230952635192958868069082135585368016100021374085115448491268584126869589917414 913382057849280069825519574020181810564129725083607035685105533178784082900004 155251186577945396331753853209214972052660783126028196116485809868458752512999 740409279768317663991465538610893758795221497173172813151793290443112181587102 351874075722210012376872194474720934931232410706508061856237252673254073332487 575448296757345001932190219911996079798937338367324257610393898534927877747398 050808001554476406105352220232540944356771879456543040673589649101761077594836 454082348613025471847648518957583667439979150851285802060782055446299172320202 822291488695939972997429747115537185892423849385585859540743810488262464878805 330427146301194158989632879267832732245610385219701113046658710050008328517731 177648973523092666123458887310288351562644602367199664455472760831011878838915 114934093934475007302585581475619088139875235781233134227986650352272536717123 075686104500454897036007956982762639234410714658489578024140815840522953693749 971066559489445924628661996355635065262340533943914211127181069105229002465742 360413009369188925586578466846121567955425660541600507127664176605687427420032 957716064344860620123982169827172319782681662824993871499544913730205184366907 672357740005393266262276032365975171892590180110429038427418550789488743883270 306328327996300720069801224436511639408692222074532024462412115580435454206421 512158505689615735641431306888344318528085397592773443365538418834030351782294 625370201578215737326552318576355409895403323638231921989217117744946940367829 618592080340386757583411151882417743914507736638407188048935825686854201164503 135763335550944031923672034865101056104987272647213198654343545040913185951314 518127643731043897250700498198705217627249406521461995923214231443977654670835 171474936798618655279171582408065106379950018429593879915835017158075988378496 225739851212981032637937621832245659423668537679911314010804313973233544909082 491049914332584329882103398469814171575601082970658306521134707680368069532297 199059990445120908727577622535104090239288877942463048328031913271049547859918 019696783532146444118926063152661816744319355081708187547705080265402529410921 826485821385752668815558411319856002213515888721036569608751506318753300294211 868222189377554602722729129050429225978771066787384000061677215463844129237119 352182849982435092089180168557279815642185819119749098573057033266764646072875 743056537260276898237325974508447964954564803077159815395582777913937360171742 299602735310276871944944491793978514463159731443535185049141394155732938204854 212350817391254974981930871439661513294204591938010623142177419918406018034794 988769105155790555480695387854006645337598186284641990522045280330626369562649 091082762711590385699505124652999606285544383833032763859980079292284665950355 121124528408751622906026201185777531374794936205549640107300134885315073548735 390560290893352640071327473262196031177343394367338575912450814933573691166454 128178817145402305475066713651825828489809951213919399563324133655677709800308 191027204099714868741813466700609405102146269028044915964654533010775469541308 871416531254481306119240782118869005602778182423502269618934435254763357353648 561936325441775661398170393063287216690572225974520919291726219984440964615826 945638023950283712168644656178523556516412771282691868861557271620147493405227 694659571219831494338162211400693630743044417328478610177774383797703723179525 543410722344551255558999864618387676490397246116795901810003509892864120419516 355110876320426761297982652942588295114127584126273279079880755975185157684126 474220947972184330935297266521001566251455299474512763155091763673025946213293 019040283795424632325855030109670692272022707486341900543830265068121414213505 715417505750863990767394633514620908288893493837643939925690060406731142209331 219593620298297235116325938677224147791162957278075239505625158160313335938231 150051862689053065836812998810866326327198061127154885879809348791291370749823 057592909186293919501472119758606727009254771802575033773079939713453953264619 526999659638565491759045833358579910201271320458390320085387888163363768518208 372788513117522776960978796214237216254521459128183179821604411131167140691482 717098101545778193920231156387195080502467972579249760577262591332855972637121 120190572077140914864507409492671803581515757151405039761096384675556929897038 354731410022380258346876735012977541327953206097115450648421218593649099791776 687477448188287063231551586503289816422828823274686610659273219790716238464215 348985247621678905026099804526648392954235728734397768049577409144953839157556 548545905897649519851380100795801078375994577529919670054760225255203445398871 253878017196071816407812484784725791240782454436168234523957068951427226975043 187363326301110305342333582160933319121880660826834142891041517324721605335584 999322454873077882290525232423486153152097693846104258284971496347534183756200 301491570327968530186863157248840152663983568956363465743532178349319982554211 730846774529708583950761645822963032442432823773745051702856069806788952176819 815671078163340526675953942492628075696832610749532339053622309080708145591983 735537774874202903901814293731152933464446815121294509759653430628421531944572 711861490001765055817709530246887526325011970520947615941676872778447200019278 913725184162285778379228443908430118112149636642465903363419454065718354477191 244662125939265662030688852005559912123536371822692253178145879259375044144893 398160865790087616502463519704582889548179375668104647461410514249887025213993 687050937230544773411264135489280684105910771667782123833281026218558775131272 117934444820144042574508306394473836379390628300897330624138061458941422769474 793166571762318247216835067807648757342049155762821758397297513447899069658953 254894033561561316740327647246921250575911625152965456854463349811431767025729 566184477548746937846423373723898192066204851189437886822480727935202250179654 534375727416391079197295295081294292220534771730418447791567399173841831171036 252439571615271466900581470000263301045264354786590329073320546833887207873544 476264792529769017091200787418373673508771337697768349634425241994995138831507 487753743384945825976556099655595431804092017849718468549737069621208852437701 385375768141663272241263442398215294164537800049250726276515078908507126599703 670872669276430837722968598516912230503746274431085293430527307886528397733524 601746352770320593817912539691562106363762588293757137384075440646896478310070 458061344673127159119460843593582598778283526653115106504162329532904777217408 355934972375855213804830509000964667608830154061282430874064559443185341375522 016630581211103345312074508682433943215904359443031243122747138584203039010607 094031523555617276799416002039397509989762933532585557562480899669182986422267 750236019325797472674257821111973470940235745722227121252685238429587427350156 366009318804549333898974157149054418255973808087156528143010267046028431681923 039253529779576586241439270154974087927313105163611913757700892956482332364829 826302460797587576774537716010249080462430185652416175665560016085912153455626 760219268998285537787258314514408265458348440947846317877737479465358016996077 940556870119232860804113090462935087182712593466871276669487389982459852778649 956916546402945893506496433580982476596516514209098675520380830920323048734270 346828875160407154665383461961122301375945157925269674364253192739003603860823 645076269882749761872357547676288995075211480485252795084503395857083813047693 788132112367428131948795022806632017002246033198967197064916374117585485187848 401205484467258885140156272501982171906696081262778548596481836962141072171421 498636191877475450965030895709947093433785698167446582826791194061195603784539 785583924076127634410576675102430755981455278616781594965706255975507430652108 530159790807334373607943286675789053348366955548680391343372015649883422089339 997164147974693869690548008919306713805717150585730714881564992071408675825960 287605645978242377024246980532805663278704192676846711626687946348695046450742 021937394525926266861355294062478136120620263649819999949840514386828525895634 226432870766329930489172340072547176418868535137233266787792173834754148002280 339299735793615241275582956927683723123479898944627433045456679006203242051639 628258844308543830720149567210646053323853720314324211260742448584509458049408 182092763914000854042202355626021856434899414543995041098059181794888262805206 644108631900168856815516922948620301073889718100770929059048074909242714101893 354281842999598816966099383696164438152887721408526808875748829325873580990567 075581701794916190611400190855374488272620093668560447559655747648567400817738 170330738030547697360978654385938218722058390234444350886749986650604064587434 600533182743629617786251808189314436325120510709469081358644051922951293245007 883339878842933934243512634336520438581291283434529730865290978330067126179813 031679438553572629699874035957045845223085639009891317947594875212639707837594 486113945196028675121056163897600888009274611586080020780334159145179707303683 519697776607637378533301202412011204698860920933908536577322239241244905153278 095095586645947763448226998607481329730263097502881210351772312446509534965369 309001863776409409434983731325132186208021480992268550294845466181471555744470 966953017769043427203189277060471778452793916047228153437980353967986142437095 668322149146543801459382927739339603275404800955223181666738035718393275707714 204672383862461780397629237713120958078936384144792980258806552212926209362393 063731349664018661951081158347117331202580586672763999276357907806381881306915 636627412543125958993611964762610140556350339952314032311381965623632719896183 725484533370206256346422395276694356837676136871196292181875457608161705303159 072882870071231366630872275491866139577373054606599743781098764980241401124214 277366808275139095931340415582626678951084677611866595766016599817808941498575 497628438785610026379654317831363402513581416115190209649913354873313111502270 068193013592959597164019719605362503355847998096348871803911161281359596856547 886832585643789617315976200241962155289629790481982219946226948713746244472909 345647002853769495885959160678928249105441251599630078136836749020937491573289 627002865682934443134234735123929825916673950342599586897069726733258273590312 128874666045146148785034614282776599160809039865257571726308183349444182019353 338507129234577437557934406217871133006310600332405399169368260374617663856575 887758020122936635327026710068126182517291460820254189288593524449107013820621 155382779356529691457650204864328286555793470720963480737269214118689546732276 775133569019015372366903686538916129168888787640752549349424973342718117889275 993159671935475898809792452526236365903632007085444078454479734829180208204492 667063442043755532505052752283377888704080403353192340768563010934777212563908 864041310107381785333831603813528082811904083256440184205374679299262203769871 801806112262449090924264198582086175117711378905160914038157500336642415609521 632819712233502316742260056794128140621721964184270578432895980288233505982820 819666624903585778994033315227481777695284368163008853176969478369058067106482 808359804669884109813515865490693331952239436328792399053481098783027450017206 543369906611778455436468772363184446476806914282800455107468664539280539940910 875493916609573161971503316696830992946634914279878084225722069714887558063748 030886299511847318712477729191007022758889348693945628951580296537215040960310 776128983126358996489341024703603664505868728758905140684123812424738638542790 828273382797332688550493587430316027474906312957234974261122151741715313361862 241091386950068883589896234927631731647834007746088665559873338211382992877691 149549218419208777160606847287467368188616750722101726110383067178785669481294 878504894306308616994879870316051588410828235127415353851336589533294862949449 506186851477910580469603906937266267038651290520113781085861618888694795760741 358553458515176805197333443349523012039577073962377131603024288720053732099825 300897761897312981788194467173116064723147624845755192873278282512718244680782 421521646956781929409823892628494376024885227900362021938669648221562809360537 317804086372726842669642192994681921490870170753336109479138180406328738759384 826953558307739576144799727000347288018278528138950321798634521611106660883931 405322694490545552786789441757920244002145078019209980446138254780585804844241 640477503153605490659143007815837243012313751156228401583864427089071828481675 752712384678245953433444962201009607105137060846180118754312072549133499424761 711563332140893460915656155060031738421870157022610310191660388706466143889773 631878094071152752817468957640158104701696524755774089164456867771715850058326 994340167720215676772406812836656526412298243946513319735919970940327593850266 955747023181320324371642058614103360652453693916005064495306016126782264894243 739716671766123104897503188573216555498834212180284691252908610148552781527762 562375045637576949773433684601560772703550962904939248708840628106794362241870 474700836884267102255830240359984164595112248527263363264511401739524808619463 584078375355688562231711552094722306543709260679735100056554938122457548372854 571179739361575616764169289580525729752233855861138832217110736226581621884244 317885748879810902665379342666421699091405653643224930133486798815488662866505 234699723557473842483059042367714327879231642240387776433019260019228477831383 763253612102533693581262408686669973827597736568222790721583247888864236934639 616436330873013981421143030600873066616480367898409133592629340230432497492688 783164360268101130957071614191283068657732353263965367739031766136131596555358 499939860056515592193675997771793301974468814837110320650369319289452140265091 546518430993655349333718342529843367991593941746622390038952767381333061774762 957494386871697845376721949350659087571191772087547710718993796089477451265475 750187119487073873678589020061737332107569330221632062843206567119209695058576 117396163232621770894542621460985841023781321581772760222273813349541048100307 327510779994899197796388353073444345753297591426376840544226478421606312276964 696715647399904371590332390656072664411643860540483884716191210900870101913072 607104411414324197679682854788552477947648180295973604943970047959604029274629 920357209976195014034831538094771460105633344699882082212058728151072918297121 191787642488035467231691654185225672923442918712816323259696541354858957713320 833991128877591722611527337901034136208561457799239877832508355073019981845902 595835598926055329967377049172245493532968330000223018151722657578752405883224 908582128008974790932610076257877042865600699617621217684547899644070506624171 021332748679623743022915535820078014116534806564748823061500339206898379476625 503654982280532966286211793062843017049240230198571997894883689718304380518217 441914766042975243725168343541121703863137941142209529588579806015293875275379 903093887168357209576071522190027937929278630363726876582268124199338480816602 160372215471014300737753779269906958712128928801905203160128586182549441335382 078488346531163265040764242839087012101519423196165226842200371123046430067344 206474771802135307012409886035339915266792387110170622186588357378121093517977 560442563469499978725112544085452227481091487430725986960204027594117894258128 188215995235965897918114407765335432175759525553615812800116384672031934650729 680799079396371496177431211940202129757312516525376801735910155733815377200195 244454362007184847566341540744232862106099761324348754884743453966598133871746 609302053507027195298394327142537115576660002578442303107342955153394506048622 276496668762407932435319299263925373107689213535257232108088981933916866827894 828117047262450194840970097576092098372409007471797334078814182519584259809624 174761013825264395513525931188504563626418830
Wed. 4/30/14 5:07am
Wed. 4/30/14 5:09am
so, 3-ish, cause I'm supposed to be working
Wed. 4/30/14 5:10am
I used to deliver newspapers to your show.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:14am
Fair call, Umpire. Fair call...
Wed. 4/30/14 5:14am
Bedtime. Night all!
Wed. 4/30/14 5:14am
Night Inked! Your song don't go unplayed.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:16am
hi all. im curious how old is that medicine. sounds so dated, but good.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:16am
This playlist comment thing sure can take a lot of abuse.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:20am
Wed. 4/30/14 5:23am
So, if I can copy/paste 100,000 digits in here, does that mean I can copy/paste whole novels?
Wed. 4/30/14 5:24am
Only one way to find out.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:26am
Are you as curious about tea leaves as I am?
Wed. 4/30/14 5:28am
I guess I'm pretty indifferent on them.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:30am
Forget tea leaves then.
Here's Jules Verne's Around the World in 80 Days!
I always kind of wanted to read that, but couldn't be bothered.
IN WHICH PHILEAS FOGG AND PASSEPARTOUT ACCEPT EACH OTHER,
THE ONE AS MASTER, THE OTHER AS MAN
Mr. Phileas Fogg lived, in 1872, at No. 7, Saville Row, Burlington Gardens, the house in which Sheridan died in 1814. He was one of the most noticeable members of the Reform Club, though he seemed always to avoid attracting attention; an enigmatical personage, about whom little was known, except that he was a polished man of the world. People said that he resembled Byron—at least that his head was Byronic; but he was a bearded, tranquil Byron, who might live on a thousand years without growing old.
Certainly an Englishman, it was more doubtful whether Phileas Fogg was a Londoner. He was never seen on 'Change, nor at the Bank, nor in the counting-rooms of the "City"; no ships ever came into London docks of which he was the owner; he had no public employment; he had never been entered at any of the Inns of Court, either at the Temple, or Lincoln's Inn, or Gray's Inn; nor had his voice ever resounded in the Court of Chancery, or in the Exchequer, or the Queen's Bench, or the Ecclesiastical Courts. He certainly was not a manufacturer; nor was he a merchant or a gentleman farmer. His name was strange to the scientific and learned societies, and he never was known to take part in the sage deliberations of the Royal Institution or the London Institution, the Artisan's Association, or the Institution of Arts and Sciences. He belonged, in fact, to none of the numerous societies which swarm in the English capital, from the Harmonic to that of the Entomologists, founded mainly for the purpose of abolishing pernicious insects.
Phileas Fogg was a member of the Reform, and that was all.
The way in which he got admission to this exclusive club was simple enough.
He was recommended by the Barings, with whom he had an open credit. His cheques were regularly paid at sight from his account current, which was always flush.
Was Phileas Fogg rich? Undoubtedly. But those who knew him best could not imagine how he had made his fortune, and Mr. Fogg was the last person to whom to apply for the information. He was not lavish, nor, on the contrary, avaricious; for, whenever he knew that money was needed for a noble, useful, or benevolent purpose, he supplied it quietly and sometimes anonymously. He was, in short, the least communicative of men. He talked very little, and seemed all the more mysterious for his taciturn manner. His daily habits were quite open to observation; but whatever he did was so exactly the same thing that he had always done before, that the wits of the curious were fairly puzzled.
Had he travelled? It was likely, for no one seemed to know the world more familiarly; there was no spot so secluded that he did not appear to have an intimate acquaintance with it. He often corrected, with a few clear words, the thousand conjectures advanced by members of the club as to lost and unheard-of travellers, pointing out the true probabilities, and seeming as if gifted with a sort of second sight, so often did events justify his predictions. He must have travelled everywhere, at least in the spirit.
It was at least certain that Phileas Fogg had not absented himself from London for many years. Those who were honoured by a better acquaintance with him than the rest, declared that nobody could pretend to have ever seen him anywhere else. His sole pastimes were reading the papers and playing whist. He often won at this game, which, as a silent one, harmonised with his nature; but his winnings never went into his purse, being reserved as a fund for his charities. Mr. Fogg played, not to win, but for the sake of playing. The game was in his eyes a contest, a struggle with a difficulty, yet a motionless, unwearying struggle, congenial to his tastes.
Phileas Fogg was not known to have either wife or children, which may happen to the most honest people; either relatives or near friends, which is certainly more unusual. He lived alone in his house in Saville Row, whither none penetrated. A single domestic sufficed to serve him. He breakfasted and dined at the club, at hours mathematically fixed, in the same room, at the same table, never taking his meals with other members, much less bringing a guest with him; and went home at exactly midnight, only to retire at once to bed. He never used the cosy chambers which the Reform provides for its favoured members. He passed ten hours out of the twenty-four in Saville Row, either in sleeping or making his toilet. When he chose to take a walk it was with a regular step in the entrance hall with its mosaic flooring, or in the circular gallery with its dome supported by twenty red porphyry Ionic columns, and illumined by blue painted windows. When he breakfasted or dined all the resources of the club—its kitchens and pantries, its buttery and dairy—aided to crowd his table with their most succulent stores; he was served by the gravest waiters, in dress coats, and shoes with swan-skin soles, who proffered the viands in special porcelain, and on the finest linen; club decanters, of a lost mould, contained his sherry, his port, and his cinnamon-spiced claret; while his beverages were refreshingly cooled with ice, brought at great cost from the American lakes.
If to live in this style is to be eccentric, it must be confessed that there is something good in eccentricity.
The mansion in Saville Row, though not sumptuous, was exceedingly comfortable. The habits of its occupant were such as to demand but little from the sole domestic, but Phileas Fogg required him to be almost superhumanly prompt and regular. On this very 2nd of October he had dismissed James Forster, because that luckless youth had brought him shaving-water at eighty-four degrees Fahrenheit instead of eighty-six; and he was awaiting his successor, who was due at the house between eleven and half-past.
Phileas Fogg was seated squarely in his armchair, his feet close together like those of a grenadier on parade, his hands resting on his knees, his body straight, his head erect; he was steadily watching a complicated clock which indicated the hours, the minutes, the seconds, the days, the months, and the years. At exactly half-past eleven Mr. Fogg would, according to his daily habit, quit Saville Row, and repair to the Reform.
A rap at this moment sounded on the door of the cosy apartment where Phileas Fogg was seated, and James Forster, the dismissed servant, appeared.
"The new servant," said he.
A young man of thirty advanced and bowed.
"You are a Frenchman, I believe," asked Phileas Fogg, "and your name is John?"
"Jean, if monsieur pleases," replied the newcomer, "Jean Passepartout, a surname which has clung to me because I have a natural aptness for going out of one business into another. I believe I'm honest, monsieur, but, to be outspoken, I've had several trades. I've been an itinerant singer, a circus-rider, when I used to vault like Leotard, and dance on a rope like Blondin. Then I got to be a professor of gymnastics, so as to make better use of my talents; and then I was a sergeant fireman at Paris, and assisted at many a big fire. But I quitted France five years ago, and, wishing to taste the sweets of domestic life, took service as a valet here in England. Finding myself out of place, and hearing that Monsieur Phileas Fogg was the most exact and settled gentleman in the United Kingdom, I have come to monsieur in the hope of living with him a tranquil life, and forgetting even the name of Passepartout."
"Passepartout suits me," responded Mr. Fogg. "You are well recommended to me; I hear a good report of you. You know my conditions?"
"Good! What time is it?"
"Twenty-two minutes after eleven," returned Passepartout, drawing an enormous silver watch from the depths of his pocket.
"You are too slow," said Mr. Fogg.
"Pardon me, monsieur, it is impossible—"
"You are four minutes too slow. No matter; it's enough to mention the error. Now from this moment, twenty-nine minutes after eleven, a.m., this Wednesday, 2nd October, you are in my service."
Phileas Fogg got up, took his hat in his left hand, put it on his head with an automatic motion, and went off without a word.
Passepartout heard the street door shut once; it was his new master going out. He heard it shut again; it was his predecessor, James Forster, departing in his turn. Passepartout remained alone in the house in Saville Row.
IN WHICH PASSEPARTOUT IS CONVINCED THAT HE HAS AT LAST FOUND HIS IDEAL
"Faith," muttered Passepartout, somewhat flurried, "I've seen people at Madame Tussaud's as lively as my new master!"
Madame Tussaud's "people," let it be said, are of wax, and are much visited in London; speech is all that is wanting to make them human.
During his brief interview with Mr. Fogg, Passepartout had been carefully observing him. He appeared to be a man about forty years of age, with fine, handsome features, and a tall, well-shaped figure; his hair and whiskers were light, his forehead compact and unwrinkled, his face rather pale, his teeth magnificent. His countenance possessed in the highest degree what physiognomists call "repose in action," a quality of those who act rather than talk. Calm and phlegmatic, with a clear eye, Mr. Fogg seemed a perfect type of that English composure which Angelica Kauffmann has so skilfully represented on canvas. Seen in the various phases of his daily life, he gave the idea of being perfectly well-balanced, as exactly regulated as a Leroy chronometer. Phileas Fogg was, indeed, exactitude personified, and this was betrayed even in the expression of his very hands and feet; for in men, as well as in animals, the limbs themselves are expressive of the passions.
He was so exact that he was never in a hurry, was always ready, and was economical alike of his steps and his motions. He never took one step too many, and always went to his destination by the shortest cut; he made no superfluous gestures, and was never seen to be moved or agitated. He was the most deliberate person in the world, yet always reached his destination at the exact moment.
He lived alone, and, so to speak, outside of every social relation; and as he knew that in this world account must be taken of friction, and that friction retards, he never rubbed against anybody.
As for Passepartout, he was a true Parisian of Paris. Since he had abandoned his own country for England, taking service as a valet, he had in vain searched for a master after his own heart. Passepartout was by no means one of those pert dunces depicted by Moliere with a bold gaze and a nose held high in the air; he was an honest fellow, with a pleasant face, lips a trifle protruding, soft-mannered and serviceable, with a good round head, such as one likes to see on the shoulders of a friend. His eyes were blue, his complexion rubicund, his figure almost portly and well-built, his body muscular, and his physical powers fully developed by the exercises of his younger days. His brown hair was somewhat tumbled; for, while the ancient sculptors are said to have known eighteen methods of arranging Minerva's tresses, Passepartout was familiar with but one of dressing his own: three strokes of a large-tooth comb completed his toilet.
It would be rash to predict how Passepartout's lively nature would agree with Mr. Fogg. It was impossible to tell whether the new servant would turn out as absolutely methodical as his master required; experience alone could solve the question. Passepartout had been a sort of vagrant in his early years, and now yearned for repose; but so far he had failed to find it, though he had already served in ten English houses. But he could not take root in any of these; with chagrin, he found his masters invariably whimsical and irregular, constantly running about the country, or on the look-out for adventure. His last master, young Lord Longferry, Member of Parliament, after passing his nights in the Haymarket taverns, was too often brought home in the morning on policemen's shoulders. Passepartout, desirous of respecting the gentleman whom he served, ventured a mild remonstrance on such conduct; which, being ill-received, he took his leave. Hearing that Mr. Phileas Fogg was looking for a servant, and that his life was one of unbroken regularity, that he neither travelled nor stayed from home overnight, he felt sure that this would be the place he was after. He presented himself, and was accepted, as has been seen.
At half-past eleven, then, Passepartout found himself alone in the house in Saville Row. He began its inspection without delay, scouring it from cellar to garret. So clean, well-arranged, solemn a mansion pleased him; it seemed to him like a snail's shell, lighted and warmed by gas, which sufficed for both these purposes. When Passepartout reached the second story he recognised at once the room which he was to inhabit, and he was well satisfied with it. Electric bells and speaking-tubes afforded communication with the lower stories; while on the mantel stood an electric clock, precisely like that in Mr. Fogg's bedchamber, both beating the same second at the same instant. "That's good, that'll do," said Passepartout to himself.
He suddenly observed, hung over the clock, a card which, upon inspection, proved to be a programme of the daily routine of the house. It comprised all that was required of the servant, from eight in the morning, exactly at which hour Phileas Fogg rose, till half-past eleven, when he left the house for the Reform Club—all the details of service, the tea and toast at twenty-three minutes past eight, the shaving-water at thirty-seven minutes past nine, and the toilet at twenty minutes before ten. Everything was regulated and foreseen that was to be done from half-past eleven a.m. till midnight, the hour at which the methodical gentleman retired.
Mr. Fogg's wardrobe was amply supplied and in the best taste. Each pair of trousers, coat, and vest bore a number, indicating the time of year and season at which they were in turn to be laid out for wearing; and the same system was applied to the master's shoes. In short, the house in Saville Row, which must have been a very temple of disorder and unrest under the illustrious but dissipated Sheridan, was cosiness, comfort, and method idealised. There was no study, nor were there books, which would have been quite useless to Mr. Fogg; for at the Reform two libraries, one of general literature and the other of law and politics, were at his service. A moderate-sized safe stood in his bedroom, constructed so as to defy fire as well as burglars; but Passepartout found neither arms nor hunting weapons anywhere; everything betrayed the most tranquil and peaceable habits.
Having scrutinised the house from top to bottom, he rubbed his hands, a broad smile overspread his features, and he said joyfully, "This is just what I wanted! Ah, we shall get on together, Mr. Fogg and I! What a domestic and regular gentleman! A real machine; well, I don't mind serving a machine."
IN WHICH A CONVERSATION TAKES PLACE WHICH SEEMS LIKELY TO COST PHILEAS FOGG DEAR
Phileas Fogg, having shut the door of his house at half-past eleven, and having put his right foot before his left five hundred and seventy-five times, and his left foot before his right five hundred and seventy-six times, reached the Reform Club, an imposing edifice in Pall Mall, which could not have cost less than three millions. He repaired at once to the dining-room, the nine windows of which open upon a tasteful garden, where the trees were already gilded with an autumn colouring; and took his place at the habitual table, the cover of which had already been laid for him. His breakfast consisted of a side-dish, a broiled fish with Reading sauce, a scarlet slice of roast beef garnished with mushrooms, a rhubarb and gooseberry tart, and a morsel of Cheshire cheese, the whole being washed down with several cups of tea, for which the Reform is famous. He rose at thirteen minutes to one, and directed his steps towards the large hall, a sumptuous apartment adorned with lavishly-framed paintings. A flunkey handed him an uncut Times, which he proceeded to cut with a skill which betrayed familiarity with this delicate operation. The perusal of this paper absorbed Phileas Fogg until a quarter before four, whilst the Standard, his next task, occupied him till the dinner hour. Dinner passed as breakfast had done, and Mr. Fogg re-appeared in the reading-room and sat down to the Pall Mall at twenty minutes before six. Half an hour later several members of the Reform came in and drew up to the fireplace, where a coal fire was steadily burning. They were Mr. Fogg's usual partners at whist: Andrew Stuart, an engineer; John Sullivan and Samuel Fallentin, bankers; Thomas Flanagan, a brewer; and Gauthier Ralph, one of the Directors of the Bank of England—all rich and highly respectable personages, even in a club which comprises the princes of English trade and finance.
"Well, Ralph," said Thomas Flanagan, "what about that robbery?"
"Oh," replied Stuart, "the Bank will lose the money."
"On the contrary," broke in Ralph, "I hope we may put our hands on the robber. Skilful detectives have been sent to all the principal ports of America and the Continent, and he'll be a clever fellow if he slips through their fingers."
"But have you got the robber's description?" asked Stuart.
"In the first place, he is no robber at all," returned Ralph, positively.
"What! a fellow who makes off with fifty-five thousand pounds, no robber?"
"Perhaps he's a manufacturer, then."
"The Daily Telegraph says that he is a gentleman."
It was Phileas Fogg, whose head now emerged from behind his newspapers, who made this remark. He bowed to his friends, and entered into the conversation. The affair which formed its subject, and which was town talk, had occurred three days before at the Bank of England. A package of banknotes, to the value of fifty-five thousand pounds, had been taken from the principal cashier's table, that functionary being at the moment engaged in registering the receipt of three shillings and sixpence. Of course, he could not have his eyes everywhere. Let it be observed that the Bank of England reposes a touching confidence in the honesty of the public. There are neither guards nor gratings to protect its treasures; gold, silver, banknotes are freely exposed, at the mercy of the first comer. A keen observer of English customs relates that, being in one of the rooms of the Bank one day, he had the curiosity to examine a gold ingot weighing some seven or eight pounds. He took it up, scrutinised it, passed it to his neighbour, he to the next man, and so on until the ingot, going from hand to hand, was transferred to the end of a dark entry; nor did it return to its place for half an hour. Meanwhile, the cashier had not so much as raised his head. But in the present instance things had not gone so smoothly. The package of notes not being found when five o'clock sounded from the ponderous clock in the "drawing office," the amount was passed to the account of profit and loss. As soon as the robbery was discovered, picked detectives hastened off to Liverpool, Glasgow, Havre, Suez, Brindisi, New York, and other ports, inspired by the proffered reward of two thousand pounds, and five per cent. on the sum that might be recovered. Detectives were also charged with narrowly watching those who arrived at or left London by rail, and a judicial examination was at once entered upon.
There were real grounds for supposing, as the Daily Telegraph said, that the thief did not belong to a professional band. On the day of the robbery a well-dressed gentleman of polished manners, and with a well-to-do air, had been observed going to and fro in the paying room where the crime was committed. A description of him was easily procured and sent to the detectives; and some hopeful spirits, of whom Ralph was one, did not despair of his apprehension. The papers and clubs were full of the affair, and everywhere people were discussing the probabilities of a successful pursuit; and the Reform Club was especially agitated, several of its members being Bank officials.
Ralph would not concede that the work of the detectives was likely to be in vain, for he thought that the prize offered would greatly stimulate their zeal and activity. But Stuart was far from sharing this confidence; and, as they placed themselves at the whist-table, they continued to argue the matter. Stuart and Flanagan played together, while Phileas Fogg had Fallentin for his partner. As the game proceeded the conversation ceased, excepting between the rubbers, when it revived again.
"I maintain," said Stuart, "that the chances are in favour of the thief, who must be a shrewd fellow."
"Well, but where can he fly to?" asked Ralph. "No country is safe for him."
"Where could he go, then?"
"Oh, I don't know that. The world is big enough."
"It was once," said Phileas Fogg, in a low tone. "Cut, sir," he added, handing the cards to Thomas Flanagan.
The discussion fell during the rubber, after which Stuart took up its thread.
"What do you mean by `once'? Has the world grown smaller?"
"Certainly," returned Ralph. "I agree with Mr. Fogg. The world has grown smaller, since a man can now go round it ten times more quickly than a hundred years ago. And that is why the search for this thief will be more likely to succeed."
"And also why the thief can get away more easily."
"Be so good as to play, Mr. Stuart," said Phileas Fogg.
But the incredulous Stuart was not convinced, and when the hand was finished, said eagerly: "You have a strange way, Ralph, of proving that the world has grown smaller. So, because you can go round it in three months—"
"In eighty days," interrupted Phileas Fogg.
"That is true, gentlemen," added John Sullivan. "Only eighty days, now that the section between Rothal and Allahabad, on the Great Indian Peninsula Railway, has been opened. Here is the estimate made by the Daily Telegraph:
From London to Suez via Mont Cenis and
Brindisi, by rail and steamboats ................. 7 days
From Suez to Bombay, by steamer .................... 13 "
From Bombay to Calcutta, by rail ................... 3 "
From Calcutta to Hong Kong, by steamer ............. 13 "
From Hong Kong to Yokohama (Japan), by steamer ..... 6 "
From Yokohama to San Francisco, by steamer ......... 22 "
From San Francisco to New York, by rail ............. 7 "
From New York to London, by steamer and rail ........ 9 "
Total ............................................ 80 days."
"Yes, in eighty days!" exclaimed Stuart, who in his excitement made a false deal. "But that doesn't take into account bad weather, contrary winds, shipwrecks, railway accidents, and so on."
"All included," returned Phileas Fogg, continuing to play despite the discussion.
"But suppose the Hindoos or Indians pull up the rails," replied Stuart; "suppose they stop the trains, pillage the luggage-vans, and scalp the passengers!"
"All included," calmly retorted Fogg; adding, as he threw down the cards, "Two trumps."
Stuart, whose turn it was to deal, gathered them up, and went on: "You are right, theoretically, Mr. Fogg, but practically—"
"Practically also, Mr. Stuart."
"I'd like to see you do it in eighty days."
"It depends on you. Shall we go?"
"Heaven preserve me! But I would wager four thousand pounds that such a journey, made under these conditions, is impossible."
"Quite possible, on the contrary," returned Mr. Fogg.
"Well, make it, then!"
"The journey round the world in eighty days?"
"I should like nothing better."
"At once. Only I warn you that I shall do it at your expense."
"It's absurd!" cried Stuart, who was beginning to be annoyed at the persistency of his friend. "Come, let's go on with the game."
"Deal over again, then," said Phileas Fogg. "There's a false deal."
Stuart took up the pack with a feverish hand; then suddenly put them down again.
"Well, Mr. Fogg," said he, "it shall be so: I will wager the four thousand on it."
"Calm yourself, my dear Stuart," said Fallentin. "It's only a joke."
"When I say I'll wager," returned Stuart, "I mean it."
"All right," said Mr. Fogg; and, turning to the others, he continued: "I have a deposit of twenty thousand at Baring's which I will willingly risk upon it."
"Twenty thousand pounds!" cried Sullivan. "Twenty thousand pounds, which you would lose by a single accidental delay!"
"The unforeseen does not exist," quietly replied Phileas Fogg.
"But, Mr. Fogg, eighty days are only the estimate of the least possible time in which the journey can be made."
"A well-used minimum suffices for everything."
"But, in order not to exceed it, you must jump mathematically from the trains upon the steamers, and from the steamers upon the trains again."
"I will jump—mathematically."
"You are joking."
"A true Englishman doesn't joke when he is talking about so serious a thing as a wager," replied Phileas Fogg, solemnly. "I will bet twenty thousand pounds against anyone who wishes that I will make the tour of the world in eighty days or less; in nineteen hundred and twenty hours, or a hundred and fifteen thousand two hundred minutes. Do you accept?"
"We accept," replied Messrs. Stuart, Fallentin, Sullivan, Flanagan, and Ralph, after consulting each other.
"Good," said Mr. Fogg. "The train leaves for Dover at a quarter before nine. I will take it."
"This very evening?" asked Stuart.
"This very evening," returned Phileas Fogg. He took out and consulted a pocket almanac, and added, "As today is Wednesday, the 2nd of October, I shall be due in London in this very room of the Reform Club, on Saturday, the 21st of December, at a quarter before nine p.m.; or else the twenty thousand pounds, now deposited in my name at Baring's, will belong to you, in fact and in right, gentlemen. Here is a cheque for the amount."
A memorandum of the wager was at once drawn up and signed by the six parties, during which Phileas Fogg preserved a stoical composure. He certainly did not bet to win, and had only staked the twenty thousand pounds, half of his fortune, because he foresaw that he might have to expend the other half to carry out this difficult, not to say unattainable, project. As for his antagonists, they seemed much agitated; not so much by the value of their stake, as because they had some scruples about betting under conditions so difficult to their friend.
The clock struck seven, and the party offered to suspend the game so that Mr. Fogg might make his preparations for departure.
"I am quite ready now," was his tranquil response. "Diamonds are trumps: be so good as to play, gentlemen."
IN WHICH PHILEAS FOGG ASTOUNDS PASSEPARTOUT, HIS SERVANT
Having won twenty guineas at whist, and taken leave of his friends, Phileas Fogg, at twenty-five minutes past seven, left the Reform Club.
Passepartout, who had conscientiously studied the programme of his duties, was more than surprised to see his master guilty of the inexactness of appearing at this unaccustomed hour; for, according to rule, he was not due in Saville Row until precisely midnight.
Mr. Fogg repaired to his bedroom, and called out, "Passepartout!"
Passepartout did not reply. It could not be he who was called; it was not the right hour.
"Passepartout!" repeated Mr. Fogg, without raising his voice.
Passepartout made his appearance.
"I've called you twice," observed his master.
"But it is not midnight," responded the other, showing his watch.
"I know it; I don't blame you. We start for Dover and Calais in ten minutes."
A puzzled grin overspread Passepartout's round face; clearly he had not comprehended his master.
"Monsieur is going to leave home?"
"Yes," returned Phileas Fogg. "We are going round the world."
Passepartout opened wide his eyes, raised his eyebrows, held up his hands, and seemed about to collapse, so overcome was he with stupefied astonishment.
"Round the world!" he murmured.
"In eighty days," responded Mr. Fogg. "So we haven't a moment to lose."
"But the trunks?" gasped Passepartout, unconsciously swaying his head from right to left.
"We'll have no trunks; only a carpet-bag, with two shirts and three pairs of stockings for me, and the same for you. We'll buy our clothes on the way. Bring down my mackintosh and traveling-cloak, and some stout shoes, though we shall do little walking. Make haste!"
Passepartout tried to reply, but could not. He went out, mounted to his own room, fell into a chair, and muttered: "That's good, that is! And I, who wanted to remain quiet!"
He mechanically set about making the preparations for departure. Around the world in eighty days! Was his master a fool? No. Was this a joke, then? They were going to Dover; good! To Calais; good again! After all, Passepartout, who had been away from France five years, would not be sorry to set foot on his native soil again. Perhaps they would go as far as Paris, and it would do his eyes good to see Paris once more. But surely a gentleman so chary of his steps would stop there; no doubt—but, then, it was none the less true that he was going away, this so domestic person hitherto!
By eight o'clock Passepartout had packed the modest carpet-bag, containing the wardrobes of his master and himself; then, still troubled in mind, he carefully shut the door of his room, and descended to Mr. Fogg.
Mr. Fogg was quite ready. Under his arm might have been observed a red-bound copy of Bradshaw's Continental Railway Steam Transit and General Guide, with its timetables showing the arrival and departure of steamers and railways. He took the carpet-bag, opened it, and slipped into it a goodly roll of Bank of England notes, which would pass wherever he might go.
"You have forgotten nothing?" asked he.
"My mackintosh and cloak?"
"Here they are."
"Good! Take this carpet-bag," handing it to Passepartout. "Take good care of it, for there are twenty thousand pounds in it."
Passepartout nearly dropped the bag, as if the twenty thousand pounds were in gold, and weighed him down.
Master and man then descended, the street-door was double-locked, and at the end of Saville Row they took a cab and drove rapidly to Charing Cross. The cab stopped before the railway station at twenty minutes past eight. Passepartout jumped off the box and followed his master, who, after paying the cabman, was about to enter the station, when a poor beggar-woman, with a child in her arms, her naked feet smeared with mud, her head covered with a wretched bonnet, from which hung a tattered feather, and her shoulders shrouded in a ragged shawl, approached, and mournfully asked for alms.
Mr. Fogg took out the twenty guineas he had just won at whist, and handed them to the beggar, saying, "Here, my good woman. I'm glad that I met you;" and passed on.
Passepartout had a moist sensation about the eyes; his master's action touched his susceptible heart.
Two first-class tickets for Paris having been speedily purchased, Mr. Fogg was crossing the station to the train, when he perceived his five friends of the Reform.
"Well, gentlemen," said he, "I'm off, you see; and, if you will examine my passport when I get back, you will be able to judge whether I have accomplished the journey agreed upon."
"Oh, that would be quite unnecessary, Mr. Fogg," said Ralph politely. "We will trust your word, as a gentleman of honour."
"You do not forget when you are due in London again?" asked Stuart.
"In eighty days; on Saturday, the 21st of December, 1872, at a quarter before nine p.m. Good-bye, gentlemen."
Phileas Fogg and his servant seated themselves in a first-class carriage at twenty minutes before nine; five minutes later the whistle screamed, and the train slowly glided out of the station.
The night was dark, and a fine, steady rain was falling. Phileas Fogg, snugly ensconced in his corner, did not open his lips. Passepartout, not yet recovered from his stupefaction, clung mechanically to the carpet-bag, with its enormous treasure.
Just as the train was whirling through Sydenham, Passepartout suddenly uttered a cry of despair.
"What's the matter?" asked Mr. Fogg.
"Alas! In my hurry—I—I forgot—"
"To turn off the gas in my room!"
"Very well, young man," returned Mr. Fogg, coolly; "it will burn—at your expense."
IN WHICH A NEW SPECIES OF FUNDS, UNKNOWN TO THE MONEYED MEN, APPEARS ON 'CHANGE
Phileas Fogg rightly suspected that his departure from London would create a lively sensation at the West End. The news of the bet spread through the Reform Club, and afforded an exciting topic of conversation to its members. From the club it soon got into the papers throughout England. The boasted "tour of the world" was talked about, disputed, argued with as much warmth as if the subject were another Alabama claim. Some took sides with Phileas Fogg, but the large majority shook their heads and declared against him; it was absurd, impossible, they declared, that the tour of the world could be made, except theoretically and on paper, in this minimum of time, and with the existing means of travelling. The Times, Standard, Morning Post, and Daily News, and twenty other highly respectable newspapers scouted Mr. Fogg's project as madness; the Daily Telegraph alone hesitatingly supported him. People in general thought him a lunatic, and blamed his Reform Club friends for having accepted a wager which betrayed the mental aberration of its proposer.
Articles no less passionate than logical appeared on the question, for geography is one of the pet subjects of the English; and the columns devoted to Phileas Fogg's venture were eagerly devoured by all classes of readers. At first some rash individuals, principally of the gentler sex, espoused his cause, which became still more popular when the Illustrated London News came out with his portrait, copied from a photograph in the Reform Club. A few readers of the Daily Telegraph even dared to say, "Why not, after all? Stranger things have come to pass."
At last a long article appeared, on the 7th of October, in the bulletin of the Royal Geographical Society, which treated the question from every point of view, and demonstrated the utter folly of the enterprise.
Everything, it said, was against the travellers, every obstacle imposed alike by man and by nature. A miraculous agreement of the times of departure and arrival, which was impossible, was absolutely necessary to his success. He might, perhaps, reckon on the arrival of trains at the designated hours, in Europe, where the distances were relatively moderate; but when he calculated upon crossing India in three days, and the United States in seven, could he rely beyond misgiving upon accomplishing his task? There were accidents to machinery, the liability of trains to run off the line, collisions, bad weather, the blocking up by snow—were not all these against Phileas Fogg? Would he not find himself, when travelling by steamer in winter, at the mercy of the winds and fogs? Is it uncommon for the best ocean steamers to be two or three days behind time? But a single delay would suffice to fatally break the chain of communication; should Phileas Fogg once miss, even by an hour; a steamer, he would have to wait for the next, and that would irrevocably render his attempt vain.
This article made a great deal of noise, and, being copied into all the papers, seriously depressed the advocates of the rash tourist.
Everybody knows that England is the world of betting men, who are of a higher class than mere gamblers; to bet is in the English temperament. Not only the members of the Reform, but the general public, made heavy wagers for or against Phileas Fogg, who was set down in the betting books as if he were a race-horse. Bonds were issued, and made their appearance on 'Change; "Phileas Fogg bonds" were offered at par or at a premium, and a great business was done in them. But five days after the article in the bulletin of the Geographical Society appeared, the demand began to subside: "Phileas Fogg" declined. They were offered by packages, at first of five, then of ten, until at last nobody would take less than twenty, fifty, a hundred!
Lord Albemarle, an elderly paralytic gentleman, was now the only advocate of Phileas Fogg left. This noble lord, who was fastened to his chair, would have given his fortune to be able to make the tour of the world, if it took ten years; and he bet five thousand pounds on Phileas Fogg. When the folly as well as the uselessness of the adventure was pointed out to him, he contented himself with replying, "If the thing is feasible, the first to do it ought to be an Englishman."
The Fogg party dwindled more and more, everybody was going against him, and the bets stood a hundred and fifty and two hundred to one; and a week after his departure an incident occurred which deprived him of backers at any price.
The commissioner of police was sitting in his office at nine o'clock one evening, when the following telegraphic dispatch was put into his hands:
Suez to London.
Rowan, Commissioner of Police, Scotland Yard:
I've found the bank robber, Phileas Fogg. Send with out delay warrant of arrest to Bombay.
The effect of this dispatch was instantaneous. The polished gentleman disappeared to give place to the bank robber. His photograph, which was hung with those of the rest of the members at the Reform Club, was minutely examined, and it betrayed, feature by feature, the description of the robber which had been provided to the police. The mysterious habits of Phileas Fogg were recalled; his solitary ways, his sudden departure; and it seemed clear that, in undertaking a tour round the world on the pretext of a wager, he had had no other end in view than to elude the detectives, and throw them off his track.
IN WHICH FIX, THE DETECTIVE, BETRAYS A VERY NATURAL IMPATIENCE
The circumstances under which this telegraphic dispatch about Phileas Fogg was sent were as follows:
The steamer Mongolia, belonging to the Peninsular and Oriental Company, built of iron, of two thousand eight hundred tons burden, and five hundred horse-power, was due at eleven o'clock a.m. on Wednesday, the 9th of October, at Suez. The Mongolia plied regularly between Brindisi and Bombay via the Suez Canal, and was one of the fastest steamers belonging to the company, always making more than ten knots an hour between Brindisi and Suez, and nine and a half between Suez and Bombay.
Two men were promenading up and down the wharves, among the crowd of natives and strangers who were sojourning at this once straggling village—now, thanks to the enterprise of M. Lesseps, a fast-growing town. One was the British consul at Suez, who, despite the prophecies of the English Government, and the unfavourable predictions of Stephenson, was in the habit of seeing, from his office window, English ships daily passing to and fro on the great canal, by which the old roundabout route from England to India by the Cape of Good Hope was abridged by at least a half. The other was a small, slight-built personage, with a nervous, intelligent face, and bright eyes peering out from under eyebrows which he was incessantly twitching. He was just now manifesting unmistakable signs of impatience, nervously pacing up and down, and unable to stand still for a moment. This was Fix, one of the detectives who had been dispatched from England in search of the bank robber; it was his task to narrowly watch every passenger who arrived at Suez, and to follow up all who seemed to be suspicious characters, or bore a resemblance to the description of the criminal, which he had received two days before from the police headquarters at London. The detective was evidently inspired by the hope of obtaining the splendid reward which would be the prize of success, and awaited with a feverish impatience, easy to understand, the arrival of the steamer Mongolia.
"So you say, consul," asked he for the twentieth time, "that this steamer is never behind time?"
"No, Mr. Fix," replied the consul. "She was bespoken yesterday at Port Said, and the rest of the way is of no account to such a craft. I repeat that the Mongolia has been in advance of the time required by the company's regulations, and gained the prize awarded for excess of speed."
"Does she come directly from Brindisi?"
"Directly from Brindisi; she takes on the Indian mails there, and she left there Saturday at five p.m. Have patience, Mr. Fix; she will not be late. But really, I don't see how, from the description you have, you will be able to recognise your man, even if he is on board the Mongolia."
"A man rather feels the presence of these fellows, consul, than recognises them. You must have a scent for them, and a scent is like a sixth sense which combines hearing, seeing, and smelling. I've arrested more than one of these gentlemen in my time, and, if my thief is on board, I'll answer for it; he'll not slip through my fingers."
"I hope so, Mr. Fix, for it was a heavy robbery."
"A magnificent robbery, consul; fifty-five thousand pounds! We don't often have such windfalls. Burglars are getting to be so contemptible nowadays! A fellow gets hung for a handful of shillings!"
"Mr. Fix," said the consul, "I like your way of talking, and hope you'll succeed; but I fear you will find it far from easy. Don't you see, the description which you have there has a singular resemblance to an honest man?"
"Consul," remarked the detective, dogmatically, "great robbers always resemble honest folks. Fellows who have rascally faces have only one course to take, and that is to remain honest; otherwise they would be arrested off-hand. The artistic thing is, to unmask honest countenances; it's no light task, I admit, but a real art."
Mr. Fix evidently was not wanting in a tinge of self-conceit.
Little by little the scene on the quay became more animated; sailors of various nations, merchants, ship-brokers, porters, fellahs, bustled to and fro as if the steamer were immediately expected. The weather was clear, and slightly chilly. The minarets of the town loomed above the houses in the pale rays of the sun. A jetty pier, some two thousand yards along, extended into the roadstead. A number of fishing-smacks and coasting boats, some retaining the fantastic fashion of ancient galleys, were discernible on the Red Sea.
As he passed among the busy crowd, Fix, according to habit, scrutinised the passers-by with a keen, rapid glance.
It was now half-past ten.
"The steamer doesn't come!" he exclaimed, as the port clock struck.
"She can't be far off now," returned his companion.
"How long will she stop at Suez?"
"Four hours; long enough to get in her coal. It is thirteen hundred and ten miles from Suez to Aden, at the other end of the Red Sea, and she has to take in a fresh coal supply."
"And does she go from Suez directly to Bombay?"
"Without putting in anywhere."
"Good!" said Fix. "If the robber is on board he will no doubt get off at Suez, so as to reach the Dutch or French colonies in Asia by some other route. He ought to know that he would not be safe an hour in India, which is English soil."
"Unless," objected the consul, "he is exceptionally shrewd. An English criminal, you know, is always better concealed in London than anywhere else."
This observation furnished the detective food for thought, and meanwhile the consul went away to his office. Fix, left alone, was more impatient than ever, having a presentiment that the robber was on board the Mongolia. If he had indeed left London intending to reach the New World, he would naturally take the route via India, which was less watched and more difficult to watch than that of the Atlantic. But Fix's reflections were soon interrupted by a succession of sharp whistles, which announced the arrival of the Mongolia. The porters and fellahs rushed down the quay, and a dozen boats pushed off from the shore to go and meet the steamer. Soon her gigantic hull appeared passing along between the banks, and eleven o'clock struck as she anchored in the road. She brought an unusual number of passengers, some of whom remained on deck to scan the picturesque panorama of the town, while the greater part disembarked in the boats, and landed on the quay.
Fix took up a position, and carefully examined each face and figure which made its appearance. Presently one of the passengers, after vigorously pushing his way through the importunate crowd of porters, came up to him and politely asked if he could point out the English consulate, at the same time showing a passport which he wished to have visaed. Fix instinctively took the passport, and with a rapid glance read the description of its bearer. An involuntary motion of surprise nearly escaped him, for the description in the passport was identical with that of the bank robber which he had received from Scotland Yard.
"Is this your passport?" asked he.
"No, it's my master's."
"And your master is—"
"He stayed on board."
"But he must go to the consul's in person, so as to establish his identity."
"Oh, is that necessary?"
"And where is the consulate?"
"There, on the corner of the square," said Fix, pointing to a house two hundred steps off.
"I'll go and fetch my master, who won't be much pleased, however, to be disturbed."
The passenger bowed to Fix, and returned to the steamer.
WHICH ONCE MORE DEMONSTRATES THE USELESSNESS OF PASSPORTS AS AIDS TO DETECTIVES
The detective passed down the quay, and rapidly made his way to the consul's office, where he was at once admitted to the presence of that official.
"Consul," said he, without preamble, "I have strong reasons for believing that my man is a passenger on the Mongolia." And he narrated what had just passed concerning the passport.
"Well, Mr. Fix," replied the consul, "I shall not be sorry to see the rascal's face; but perhaps he won't come here—that is, if he is the person you suppose him to be. A robber doesn't quite like to leave traces of his flight behind him; and, besides, he is not obliged to have his passport countersigned."
"If he is as shrewd as I think he is, consul, he will come."
"To have his passport visaed?"
"Yes. Passports are only good for annoying honest folks, and aiding in the flight of rogues. I assure you it will be quite the thing for him to do; but I hope you will not visa the passport."
"Why not? If the passport is genuine I have no right to refuse."
"Still, I must keep this man here until I can get a warrant to arrest him from London."
"Ah, that's your look-out. But I cannot—"
The consul did not finish his sentence, for as he spoke a knock was heard at the door, and two strangers entered, one of whom was the servant whom Fix had met on the quay. The other, who was his master, held out his passport with the request that the consul would do him the favour to visa it. The consul took the document and carefully read it, whilst Fix observed, or rather devoured, the stranger with his eyes from a corner of the room.
"You are Mr. Phileas Fogg?" said the consul, after reading the passport.
"And this man is your servant?"
"He is: a Frenchman, named Passepartout."
"You are from London?"
"And you are going—"
"Very good, sir. You know that a visa is useless, and that no passport is required?"
"I know it, sir," replied Phileas Fogg; "but I wish to prove, by your visa, that I came by Suez."
"Very well, sir."
The consul proceeded to sign and date the passport, after which he added his official seal. Mr. Fogg paid the customary fee, coldly bowed, and went out, followed by his servant.
"Well?" queried the detective.
"Well, he looks and acts like a perfectly honest man," replied the consul.
"Possibly; but that is not the question. Do you think, consul, that this phlegmatic gentleman resembles, feature by feature, the robber whose description I have received?"
"I concede that; but then, you know, all descriptions—"
"I'll make certain of it," interrupted Fix. "The servant seems to me less mysterious than the master; besides, he's a Frenchman, and can't help talking. Excuse me for a little while, consul."
Fix started off in search of Passepartout.
Meanwhile Mr. Fogg, after leaving the consulate, repaired to the quay, gave some orders to Passepartout, went off to the Mongolia in a boat, and descended to his cabin. He took up his note-book, which contained the following memoranda:
"Left London, Wednesday, October 2nd, at 8.45 p.m. "Reached Paris, Thursday, October 3rd, at 7.20 a.m. "Left Paris, Thursday, at 8.40 a.m. "Reached Turin by Mont Cenis, Friday, October 4th, at 6.35 a.m. "Left Turin, Friday, at 7.20 a.m. "Arrived at Brindisi, Saturday, October 5th, at 4 p.m. "Sailed on the Mongolia, Saturday, at 5 p.m. "Reached Suez, Wednesday, October 9th, at 11 a.m. "Total of hours spent, 158+; or, in days, six days and a half."
These dates were inscribed in an itinerary divided into columns, indicating the month, the day of the month, and the day for the stipulated and actual arrivals at each principal point Paris, Brindisi, Suez, Bombay, Calcutta, Singapore, Hong Kong, Yokohama, San Francisco, New York, and London—from the 2nd of October to the 21st of December; and giving a space for setting down the gain made or the loss suffered on arrival at each locality. This methodical record thus contained an account of everything needed, and Mr. Fogg always knew whether he was behind-hand or in advance of his time. On this Friday, October 9th, he noted his arrival at Suez, and observed that he had as yet neither gained nor lost. He sat down quietly to breakfast in his cabin, never once thinking of inspecting the town, being one of those Englishmen who are wont to see foreign countries through the eyes of their domestics.
IN WHICH PASSEPARTOUT TALKS RATHER MORE, PERHAPS, THAN IS PRUDENT
Fix soon rejoined Passepartout, who was lounging and looking about on the quay, as if he did not feel that he, at least, was obliged not to see anything.
"Well, my friend," said the detective, coming up with him, "is your passport visaed?"
"Ah, it's you, is it, monsieur?" responded Passepartout. "Thanks, yes, the passport is all right."
"And you are looking about you?"
"Yes; but we travel so fast that I seem to be journeying in a dream. So this is Suez?"
"Certainly, in Egypt."
"And in Africa?"
"In Africa!" repeated Passepartout. "Just think, monsieur, I had no idea that we should go farther than Paris; and all that I saw of Paris was between twenty minutes past seven and twenty minutes before nine in the morning, between the Northern and the Lyons stations, through the windows of a car, and in a driving rain! How I regret not having seen once more Pere la Chaise and the circus in the Champs Elysees!"
"You are in a great hurry, then?"
"I am not, but my master is. By the way, I must buy some shoes and shirts. We came away without trunks, only with a carpet-bag."
"I will show you an excellent shop for getting what you want."
"Really, monsieur, you are very kind."
And they walked off together, Passepartout chatting volubly as they went along.
"Above all," said he; "don't let me lose the steamer."
"You have plenty of time; it's only twelve o'clock."
Passepartout pulled out his big watch. "Twelve!" he exclaimed; "why, it's only eight minutes before ten."
"Your watch is slow."
"My watch? A family watch, monsieur, which has come down from my great-grandfather! It doesn't vary five minutes in the year. It's a perfect chronometer, look you."
"I see how it is," said Fix. "You have kept London time, which is two hours behind that of Suez. You ought to regulate your watch at noon in each country."
"I regulate my watch? Never!"
"Well, then, it will not agree with the sun."
"So much the worse for the sun, monsieur. The sun will be wrong, then!"
And the worthy fellow returned the watch to its fob with a defiant gesture. After a few minutes silence, Fix resumed: "You left London hastily, then?"
"I rather think so! Last Friday at eight o'clock in the evening, Monsieur Fogg came home from his club, and three-quarters of an hour afterwards we were off."
"But where is your master going?"
"Always straight ahead. He is going round the world."
"Round the world?" cried Fix.
"Yes, and in eighty days! He says it is on a wager; but, between us, I don't believe a word of it. That wouldn't be common sense. There's something else in the wind."
"Ah! Mr. Fogg is a character, is he?"
"I should say he was."
"Is he rich?"
"No doubt, for he is carrying an enormous sum in brand new banknotes with him. And he doesn't spare the money on the way, either: he has offered a large reward to the engineer of the Mongolia if he gets us to Bombay well in advance of time."
"And you have known your master a long time?"
"Why, no; I entered his service the very day we left London."
The effect of these replies upon the already suspicious and excited detective may be imagined. The hasty departure from London soon after the robbery; the large sum carried by Mr. Fogg; his eagerness to reach distant countries; the pretext of an eccentric and foolhardy bet—all confirmed Fix in his theory. He continued to pump poor Passepartout, and learned that he really knew little or nothing of his master, who lived a solitary existence in London, was said to be rich, though no one knew whence came his riches, and was mysterious and impenetrable in his affairs and habits. Fix felt sure that Phileas Fogg would not land at Suez, but was really going on to Bombay.
"Is Bombay far from here?" asked Passepartout.
"Pretty far. It is a ten days' voyage by sea."
"And in what country is Bombay?"
"The deuce! I was going to tell you there's one thing that worries me—my burner!"
"My gas-burner, which I forgot to turn off, and which is at this moment burning at my expense. I have calculated, monsieur, that I lose two shillings every four and twenty hours, exactly sixpence more than I earn; and you will understand that the longer our journey—"
Did Fix pay any attention to Passepartout's trouble about the gas? It is not probable. He was not listening, but was cogitating a project. Passepartout and he had now reached the shop, where Fix left his companion to make his purchases, after recommending him not to miss the steamer, and hurried back to the consulate. Now that he was fully convinced, Fix had quite recovered his equanimity.
"Consul," said he, "I have no longer any doubt. I have spotted my man. He passes himself off as an odd stick who is going round the world in eighty days."
"Then he's a sharp fellow," returned the consul, "and counts on returning to London after putting the police of the two countries off his track."
"We'll see about that," replied Fix.
"But are you not mistaken?"
"I am not mistaken."
"Why was this robber so anxious to prove, by the visa, that he had passed through Suez?"
"Why? I have no idea; but listen to me."
He reported in a few words the most important parts of his conversation with Passepartout.
"In short," said the consul, "appearances are wholly against this man. And what are you going to do?"
"Send a dispatch to London for a warrant of arrest to be dispatched instantly to Bombay, take passage on board the Mongolia, follow my rogue to India, and there, on English ground, arrest him politely, with my warrant in my hand, and my hand on his shoulder."
Having uttered these words with a cool, careless air, the detective took leave of the consul, and repaired to the telegraph office, whence he sent the dispatch which we have seen to the London police office. A quarter of an hour later found Fix, with a small bag in his hand, proceeding on board the Mongolia; and, ere many moments longer, the noble steamer rode out at full steam upon the waters of the Red Sea.
IN WHICH THE RED SEA AND THE INDIAN OCEAN PROVE PROPITIOUS
TO THE DESIGNS OF PHILEAS FOGG
The distance between Suez and Aden is precisely thirteen hundred and ten miles, and the regulations of the company allow the steamers one hundred and thirty-eight hours in which to traverse it. The Mongolia, thanks to the vigorous exertions of the engineer, seemed likely, so rapid was her speed, to reach her destination considerably within that time. The greater part of the passengers from Brindisi were bound for India some for Bombay, others for Calcutta by way of Bombay, the nearest route thither, now that a railway crosses the Indian peninsula. Among the passengers was a number of officials and military officers of various grades, the latter being either attached to the regular British forces or commanding the Sepoy troops, and receiving high salaries ever since the central government has assumed the powers of the East India Company: for the sub-lieutenants get 280 pounds, brigadiers, 2,400 pounds, and generals of divisions, 4,000 pounds. What with the military men, a number of rich young Englishmen on their travels, and the hospitable efforts of the purser, the time passed quickly on the Mongolia. The best of fare was spread upon the cabin tables at breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the eight o'clock supper, and the ladies scrupulously changed their toilets twice a day; and the hours were whirled away, when the sea was tranquil, with music, dancing, and games.
But the Red Sea is full of caprice, and often boisterous, like most long and narrow gulfs. When the wind came from the African or Asian coast the Mongolia, with her long hull, rolled fearfully. Then the ladies speedily disappeared below; the pianos were silent; singing and dancing suddenly ceased. Yet the good ship ploughed straight on, unretarded by wind or wave, towards the straits of Bab-el-Mandeb. What was Phileas Fogg doing all this time? It might be thought that, in his anxiety, he would be constantly watching the changes of the wind, the disorderly raging of the billows—every chance, in short, which might force the Mongolia to slacken her speed, and thus interrupt his journey. But, if he thought of these possibilities, he did not betray the fact by any outward sign.
Always the same impassible member of the Reform Club, whom no incident could surprise, as unvarying as the ship's chronometers, and seldom having the curiosity even to go upon the deck, he passed through the memorable scenes of the Red Sea with cold indifference; did not care to recognise the historic towns and villages which, along its borders, raised their picturesque outlines against the sky; and betrayed no fear of the dangers of the Arabic Gulf, which the old historians always spoke of with horror, and upon which the ancient navigators never ventured without propitiating the gods by ample sacrifices. How did this eccentric personage pass his time on the Mongolia? He made his four hearty meals every day, regardless of the most persistent rolling and pitching on the part of the steamer; and he played whist indefatigably, for he had found partners as enthusiastic in the game as himself. A tax-collector, on the way to his post at Goa; the Rev. Decimus Smith, returning to his parish at Bombay; and a brigadier-general of the English army, who was about to rejoin his brigade at Benares, made up the party, and, with Mr. Fogg, played whist by the hour together in absorbing silence.
As for Passepartout, he, too, had escaped sea-sickness, and took his meals conscientiously in the forward cabin. He rather enjoyed the voyage, for he was well fed and well lodged, took a great interest in the scenes through which they were passing, and consoled himself with the delusion that his master's whim would end at Bombay. He was pleased, on the day after leaving Suez, to find on deck the obliging person with whom he had walked and chatted on the quays.
"If I am not mistaken," said he, approaching this person, with his most amiable smile, "you are the gentleman who so kindly volunteered to guide me at Suez?"
"Ah! I quite recognise you. You are the servant of the strange Englishman—"
"Just so, monsieur—"
"Monsieur Fix," resumed Passepartout, "I'm charmed to find you on board. Where are you bound?"
"Like you, to Bombay."
"That's capital! Have you made this trip before?"
"Several times. I am one of the agents of the Peninsular Company."
"Then you know India?"
"Why yes," replied Fix, who spoke cautiously.
"A curious place, this India?"
"Oh, very curious. Mosques, minarets, temples, fakirs, pagodas, tigers, snakes, elephants! I hope you will have ample time to see the sights."
"I hope so, Monsieur Fix. You see, a man of sound sense ought not to spend his life jumping from a steamer upon a railway train, and from a railway train upon a steamer again, pretending to make the tour of the world in eighty days! No; all these gymnastics, you may be sure, will cease at Bombay."
"And Mr. Fogg is getting on well?" asked Fix, in the most natural tone in the world.
"Quite well, and I too. I eat like a famished ogre; it's the sea air."
"But I never see your master on deck."
"Never; he hasn't the least curiosity."
"Do you know, Mr. Passepartout, that this pretended tour in eighty days may conceal some secret errand—perhaps a diplomatic mission?"
"Faith, Monsieur Fix, I assure you I know nothing about it, nor would I give half a crown to find out."
After this meeting, Passepartout and Fix got into the habit of chatting together, the latter making it a point to gain the worthy man's confidence. He frequently offered him a glass of whiskey or pale ale in the steamer bar-room, which Passepartout never failed to accept with graceful alacrity, mentally pronouncing Fix the best of good fellows.
Meanwhile the Mongolia was pushing forward rapidly; on the 13th, Mocha, surrounded by its ruined walls whereon date-trees were growing, was sighted, and on the mountains beyond were espied vast coffee-fields. Passepartout was ravished to behold this celebrated place, and thought that, with its circular walls and dismantled fort, it looked like an immense coffee-cup and saucer. The following night they passed through the Strait of Bab-el-Mandeb, which means in Arabic The Bridge of Tears, and the next day they put in at Steamer Point, north-west of Aden harbour, to take in coal. This matter of fuelling steamers is a serious one at such distances from the coal-mines; it costs the Peninsular Company some eight hundred thousand pounds a year. In these distant seas, coal is worth three or four pounds sterling a ton.
The Mongolia had still sixteen hundred and fifty miles to traverse before reaching Bombay, and was obliged to remain four hours at Steamer Point to coal up. But this delay, as it was foreseen, did not affect Phileas Fogg's programme; besides, the Mongolia, instead of reaching Aden on the morning of the 15th, when she was due, arrived there on the evening of the 14th, a gain of fifteen hours.
Mr. Fogg and his servant went ashore at Aden to have the passport again visaed; Fix, unobserved, followed them. The visa procured, Mr. Fogg returned on board to resume his former habits; while Passepartout, according to custom, sauntered about among the mixed population of Somalis, Banyans, Parsees, Jews, Arabs, and Europeans who comprise the twenty-five thousand inhabitants of Aden. He gazed with wonder upon the fortifications which make this place the Gibraltar of the Indian Ocean, and the vast cisterns where the English engineers were still at work, two thousand years after the engineers of Solomon.
"Very curious, very curious," said Passepartout to himself, on returning to the steamer. "I see that it is by no means useless to travel, if a man wants to see something new." At six p.m. the Mongolia slowly moved out of the roadstead, and was soon once more on the Indian Ocean. She had a hundred and sixty-eight hours in which to reach Bombay, and the sea was favourable, the wind being in the north-west, and all sails aiding the engine. The steamer rolled but little, the ladies, in fresh toilets, reappeared on deck, and the singing and dancing were resumed. The trip was being accomplished most successfully, and Passep
Wed. 4/30/14 5:30am
Took me a while to scroll down to the "Post It" button
Wed. 4/30/14 5:30am
Also, turns out there is a limit.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:33am
Still, I applaud your effort. And I think we all learned a lot.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:34am
All in all, I'd say that was an experiment well worth our time.
Turns out the WFMU playlist comments board is a good place to share short stories and shortish novels.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:41am
great set djdj
Wed. 4/30/14 5:42am
Wed. 4/30/14 5:55am
BTW You mispronounced Lieth ... it's Liy-TH not Leth.
Wed. 4/30/14 5:56am
today i learned there was no character limit on wfmu comment board. this is evil, hark. how are we supposed to work once we know that ?
Wed. 4/30/14 5:57am
Still got it worng ... it's LEE-TH! Great set BTW
Wed. 4/30/14 5:59am
Sorry I blew your mind bibi!
Some things are better left undiscovered.
Thanks for a great set, Pat!
Wed. 4/30/14 5:59am
LEE-TH! I will NEVER forget!
| E-mail DJ Disk Jockey | Other WFMU Playlists | All artists played by Redundancy Radio with DJ Disk Jockey |