Options Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker: Playlist from August 5, 2013 Options

Benjamen Walker's avatar View Benjamen Walker's profile Options

Too Much Information is the sober hangover after the digital party has run out of memes, apps and schemes. Host Benjamen Walker finds out that, in a world where everyone overshares the truth 140 characters at a time, telling tales might be the most honest thing to do.

On WFMU | 91.1, 90.1, 91.9 FM & wfmu.org
WFMU LIVE Audio Streams (Get help):   Pop-up  |  128k MP3  |  32k MP3  |  24k Real  |  24k Windows

iTunes Feed Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker is also available as a podcast. For more info on how to have the MP3 archives of Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker delivered automatically to your computer and/or MP3 player, visit our Podcast Central page.

<-- Previous playlist | Back to Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker playlists | Next playlist -->


Options August 5, 2013: Online Dating with Chiara Atik: Andrea Silenzi Guest Hosts

Join guest host Andrea Silenzi for a look at the trials, tribulations, unwitting self-discovery and unshakable shame behind ONLINE DATING. She'll be joined for the hour by special guest Chiara Atik, the author of Modern Dating: A Field Guide from the Experts at HowAboutWe. As a dating writer, Atik has test driven all the niche dating websites -- from J-Date to FarmersOnly.com. Plus, Grandma Phyllis and your calls.

Join TMI for a live remote broadcast on Monday, August 26th from 6-7pm at McNally Jackson Books, 52 Prince Street in NYC.

Listen to this show: MP3 - 128K | | Add or read comments

Artist Track Comments
Beex  Beat Beat   Options Get it on the Free Music Archive 
Grandma Phyllis    She met my Grandpa Sol on Classifieds2000.com in 1998. This is what she looks like:

 
Podington Bear  Wind Up Toy   Options Get it on the Free Music Archive 
Chiara Atik    She's the author of Modern Dating: A Field Guide from the Experts at HowAboutWe. This is what she looks like:

 
Jim the Poet    He called in to ask me on a date, which will be the subject of next week's show. This what he looks like:

 
Riz Ortolani   Cannibal Holocaust Theme   Options Thank you for listening! Join me as I guest host for the next 2 weeks. Let me know if you have any stories for the show about love, dating or technology by sending a note to andrea at freemusicarchive.org or tweeting @andreasilenzi 

Listener comments!

Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 4:07pm BW:

showlenzi!
  Mon. 8/5/13 5:18pm Scott N:

When I hook up with someone, and really don't want to see them again.... but they want to see me again... how do I let them down gently? Is the text-message fade away ethical here? Also, what do I do if they start posting to r/askgaybros about me?
  Mon. 8/5/13 5:19pm Scott N:

http://www.reddit.com/r/askgaybros/comments/1jpwgm/dealing_with_guys_who_suck_at_texting/
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:01pm Danne D:

Yay Andrea :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:01pm Danne D:

Hi everyone
a/s/l ?
  Mon. 8/5/13 6:04pm Sternum:

Hahahaha.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:08pm Ike:

1998?! There didn't seem to be a lot of women on dating sites in 1998! (Or maybe I was looking on the wrong sites!) Kudos to her.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:10pm Danne D:

If there's anything I've learned from dating sites it's that I'm much more popular in the Ukraine apparently...
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:10pm Skirkie:

Pretty sure I didn't even have a computer yet in 1998.
  Mon. 8/5/13 6:13pm ?:

I like movies and cool books, are you single? I'm tall and thin, free Thursday ;)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:14pm Danne D:

Wait errand dates are now a thing? I recall an e-date that went so bad it kinda turned into an errand date.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:14pm Matt from Springfield:

Evening everyone! Is it still International Beer Day? Who cares! I've got mine! :D
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:14pm Greg from Bloomfield:

#1 rule of dating: Do NOT, under any circumstances, live in New Jersey.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:15pm Danne D:

@Greg no shit.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:15pm Ike:

GREG, YOU SAID IT. No joke.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:15pm Matt from Springfield:

Funny, I've just started online dating myself...

@Danne: In my short time there, it seems that you're right, particularly spambots with poor grammar and don't read English well. I must be a superhunk to those bots...
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:15pm steve:

hahaha
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:16pm Matt from Springfield:

Wow, all the New Jerseyans agree! :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:16pm Ike:

(But many other places are even worse.)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:16pm Danne D:

@M_f_S "I like your structure you seem good man."
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:17pm Danne D:

E-dates in the city seem to end with me going to the Strand afterwards since it's cheap and I don't usually get out that way unless I'm on an e-date
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:18pm Matt from Springfield:

@Danne: As long as they call you and leave voicemails saying that, I think Thunk Tank would approve ;)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:18pm Danne D:

Coffee dates are brutal for the "interview scenario" - what are great ideas for 1st dates that enable interaction w/o being things that involve no talking (like movies)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:20pm Danne D:

I find myself doing searches outside a radius of an artibrary town within New Jersey to try to generate more New Jersey results.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:20pm Ike:

IMHO, the problem w/HowAboutWe is that I like a bit of tea/coffee screening first. The "interview" quality can be stressful though, but how else to determine quickly if this person is problematically insane or grating? You can't always tell online. I do not want to be stuck with a person who stresses me out for an entire balloon ride or whatever complex, creative idea date.
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:20pm Skirkie:

Only two dates I ever got from the internet were from fellow Jersey folks. I've had zero success with the internet.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:20pm Greg from Bloomfield:

I do the same thing. Morristown, 07960.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:21pm Matt from Springfield:

Hmm, non-interaction first date. Good idea!
Though that seems harder for me to suggest with girls I meet IRL. Blind dates and online setups are easier to suggest a movie as a first date, IMO.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:21pm Matt from Springfield:

@Greg: Are you the one who always gives your north Jersey ZIP code to Tom S? :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:22pm Danne D:

I always actually ask her if there's a place they are comfortable meeting.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:22pm Ike:

Danne, Greg, me too! OKC has a 25-mile radius built in, so yeah, I use Morristown or Boonton if I want to exclude snobby New Yorkers.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:23pm Danne D:

Starbucks is good for trying to sell shady MLM products
  Mon. 8/5/13 6:24pm e:

this is terrible.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:24pm Danne D:

sorr-e
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:25pm Matt from Springfield:

Noise is a prob for me trying to understand talking. Panera is a good lunch first date, that's about the "right" noise level.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:25pm steve:

geez, dating sounds complicated
  Mon. 8/5/13 6:25pm Danilo:

Great Show
  Mon. 8/5/13 6:25pm Danilo:

Great Show
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:26pm Matt from Springfield:

@steve: It's difficult, for those with any type of social anxiety :(
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:27pm Danne D:

I'm with Andrea, I think a fair balance is the way to go - I think it's reasonable that it be proportionate (Chiara figured out the word I was looking for)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:28pm Danne D:

I am not sure I'm down with the sneak play. Though that's something I'll do with friends actually.
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:29pm Wretch:

Can't hit that "send" button until you're crafted the exact perfect response! Next thing you know, a week has gone by....
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:29pm Danne D:

Poets get all the girls *sigh*
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:29pm Matt from Springfield:

"Jim the Poet Laureate" JIM!? :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:31pm Danne D:

half plus 7.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:31pm Matt from Springfield:

But *I* could pass for a poet!! Maybe I should take my berets out of the closet and grow a goatee...
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:32pm ottovonbqe:

Andrea - just say no.
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:33pm Skirkie:

The street formula is for the older person to go half their age plus seven.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:33pm Matt from Springfield:

Wow, WFMU programming continues to break into scary new territory each day! :)
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:33pm Skirkie:

See, if I were him and I already got the date, I'd save the poem for later.
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:33pm ottovonbqe:

Make sure the date is in public at least.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:34pm Greg from Bloomfield:

This is fantastic. It should be called the "Andrea Showlenzi Finds Herself In Increasingly Awkward Radio Situations Show"
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:34pm Matt from Springfield:

28 = 21-42
40 = 27-66
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:35pm Danne D:

over/under on rest of callers asking Andrea out on a date.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:37pm Danne D:

Good question - what do you consider google etiquette ahead of a first e-date? (i don't actually do this btw, but the topic has come up in conversation)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:37pm Matt from Springfield:

Yeah, how are those religious date sites! Frangry's mentioned the desperate, repressed messages from "wewaited.com"
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:38pm steve:

why does the institution of dating exist at all? why aren't there also sites for finding new friends, just like there are for finding dates? im very introverted and have never consciously been on a date in my life... but have managed a good handful of great girlfriends and long term relationships over the years, just randomly meeting women in real life through mutual interests. the ritual of "going out on a date" sounds so bizarre and unpleasant to me.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:39pm Matt from Springfield:

@Danne: I dunno...see if anything blatant, unambiguously that person (as opposed to one with the same name) shows up? If they don't show up right away, probably best not to dig in too deeply.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:40pm Matt from Springfield:

@steve: I'm not sure about that...but with the Internet the way it is, I'm sure there must be something out there for just meeting friends.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:40pm Danne D:

@M_f_S I concur. Was curious what the expert's view was.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:40pm Danne D:

Politics is always tough in terms of dating.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:44pm Matt from Springfield:

"That's not a funny username! How am I supposed to mock this user when I meet her??"
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:45pm Danne D:

Other difficult not drinking and not being like a bible thumper
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:45pm Danne D:

I'm shocked that Andrea has an okcupid user name that's not FCC friendly
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:46pm Matt from Springfield:

Or, did she just not want to publicize it?
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:48pm Matt from Springfield:

"The National Weather Service advises you to seek shelter, in a dry apartment with a fleece blanket and a cute guy..."
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:49pm Nick the Bard:

I can't even say how hard dating is for me, because I can't even get anyone to go out with me (conversation goes fine, bring up meeting, all contact dies).

Maybe if I liked the convention scene it wouldn't be so bad. Stupid internet people.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:51pm Matt from Springfield:

@Nick: Which convention would be your first choice to check out?
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:52pm Nick the Bard:

@Matt: anything that didn't feel like I'm paying $30 to go to a flea market and gawk at type cast actors and broken wrestlers
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:54pm Danne D:

mentioned how my phone number spelled something to an e-date who had never done that with her phone number and she explains "mine spells WACKO" (and she was)
Avatar Mon. 8/5/13 6:54pm Nick the Bard:

I'm also more convinced that most of the girls on OKCupid aren't really there for dates but more to brag about themselves and their accomplishments.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:57pm Matt from Springfield:

@Danne: That was prescient of the phone company!

12 close relationships? I've got work to do.
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:58pm Matt from Springfield:

"Let's Be Monogamous: The Musical!!!"
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 6:59pm Danne D:

Goodnight lonelyhearts :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 7:00pm Matt from Springfield:

Thanks Andrea and Chiara! Stimulating discussion tonight!
Have a good night everyone!
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 7:00pm Ken From Hyde Park:

@Danne (6:54) - Ha, that's a good one. For a good time, call 1-201-32WACKO today! My name trivia is that you can spell my last name with numbers on a calculator and then turn it upside-down (7 = L, for example).
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 7:00pm Matt from Springfield:

Benjamen Walker's Lonely Hearts Club Band! :)
Avatar    Mon. 8/5/13 7:02pm Danne D:

@Ken wait you've date her too? I didn't give out the rest of the number (actually I have forgotten the rest of the number)
Post a comment!
Name:
Email address
(optional, not public):
Your comment: (No HTML, please)

<-- Previous playlist | Back to Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker playlists | Next playlist -->

RSS feeds for Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker: RSSPlaylists feed | RSSMP3 archives feed

| E-mail Benjamen Walker | Other WFMU Playlists | All artists played by Too Much Information with Benjamen Walker |

Listen on the Internet  |  Contact Us  |  Music & Programs  |  WFMU Home Page  |  Blog  |  Support Us  |  FAQ

Live Audio Streams: Flash  |  128k MP3   |  32k MP3  |  20k Real  |  20k Windows

(C) 2014 WFMU. Generated by KenzoDB, (C) 2000-2014 Ken Garson